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Writer's pictureDeric Hollings

Accepting Decline

 

“What’s my PIN [personal identification number]? C’mon, think. I know this. PIN, PIN, PIN. What is it,” I thought to myself when standing in front of an automated teller machine while spending spring break in New Orleans, Louisiana with friends in 2010.

 

I’d completely forgotten my PIN and my travel companions were patiently awaiting my portion of funds for a planned outing that day. What I experienced at that time was the effect of traumatic brain injury (TBI), as I had numerous concussive events when serving in the military.

 

According to one source, “New research led by the Perelman School of Medicine at the University of Pennsylvania shows that a single head injury could lead to dementia later in life. This risk further increases as the number of head injuries sustained by an individual increases.”

 

Years following the trip to Louisiana, I sat in front of my laptop one morning and thought, “What’s my password? There’s no way I forgot this! What is it?” Although I’d accessed my laptop on a daily basis, I suddenly forgot the password on that particular day.

 

As well, I’ve suddenly forgotten names of people known to me for years, I’ll intermittently struggle to find words when communicating, it’s at times difficult to regulate my mood, and complex tasks can sometimes prove overwhelming. All of this occurs years after TBI events.

 

Per one source, “Certain types of TBI may increase the risk of developing Alzheimer’s or another type of dementia years after the injury takes place.” Although immediate effects of a TBI event may resolve relatively quickly, lasting cognitive decline may result. According to one source:

 

Mild cognitive impairment (MCI) is the stage between the expected decline in memory and thinking that happens with age and the more serious decline of dementia. MCI may include problems with memory, language or judgment.

 

People with MCI may be aware that their memory or mental function has “slipped.” Family and close friends also may notice changes. But these changes aren’t bad enough to impact daily life or affect usual activities.

 

As alluded to, MCI stemming from multiple TBI events impacts me in a number of ways. Of these decline-related symptoms regarding dementia, I sporadically experience some of the following:

 

·  Memory loss, which is usually noticed by someone else.

·  Problems communicating or finding words.

·  Trouble with visual and spatial abilities, such as getting lost while driving.

·  Problems with reasoning or problem-solving.

·  Trouble performing complex tasks.

·  Trouble with planning and organizing.

·  Poor coordination and control of movements.

·  Confusion and disorientation.

 

When first becoming aware of “slipping” in regard to cognitive decline, I upset myself with unhelpful assumptions about the process. The 2010 incident wasn’t the earliest memory-related event for me, though it was an important one.

 

This is because I was in graduate school for counseling between 2009 and 2011, learning about Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy (REBT) as a primary psychotherapeutic modality. Importantly, this self-help model afforded me an opportunity to tolerate and accept cognitive decline.

 

In particular, REBT uses the technique of unconditional acceptance to relieve suffering. This is accomplished through use of unconditional self-acceptance, unconditional other-acceptance, and unconditional life-acceptance.

 

Additionally, foundational components incorporated into REBT relate to Stoicism—a philosophical practice valuing four virtues (wisdom, courage, temperance or moderation, and justice) as a means of achieving eudemonia—a life well-lived, as well as humanism—the process of healing oneself.

 

As well, REBT is influenced by existentialist principles—essentially positing that each of us will inevitably die and that we can search for purpose and meaning as a method of living a well-lived existence. Still, it’s worth noting that REBT isn’t some esoteric model without pragmatic value.

 

The model also uses a scientific approach to helping people get better rather than to merely feel better in regard to displeasing aspects of life. Importantly, all of the philosophical and scientific techniques of REBT require frequent (and I mean daily) practice.

 

Thus, when enrolled in grad school during 2010, I learned to stop self-disturbing with irrational beliefs about MCI. Till this day, I remain unbothered by the plausible and reasonable assumption that I may one day experience full-on dementia.

 

This is because I accept decline as it is rather than unproductively demanding that matters shouldn’t be as they are. If you’d like to know how you can also stop upsetting yourself and start accepting cognitive, relational, societal, and other forms of decline, I’m here to help.

 

If you’re looking for a provider who works to help you understand how thinking impacts physical, mental, emotional, and behavioral elements of your life—helping you to sharpen your critical thinking skills, I invite you to reach out today by using the contact widget on my website.

 

As a psychotherapist, I’m pleased to help people with an assortment of issues ranging from anger (hostility, rage, and aggression) to relational issues, adjustment matters, trauma experience, justice involvement, attention-deficit hyperactivity disorder, anxiety and depression, and other mood or personality-related matters.

 

At Hollings Therapy, LLC, serving all of Texas, I aim to treat clients with dignity and respect while offering a multi-lensed approach to the practice of psychotherapy and life coaching. My mission includes: Prioritizing the cognitive and emotive needs of clients, an overall reduction in client suffering, and supporting sustainable growth for the clients I serve. Rather than simply helping you to feel better, I want to help you get better!

 

 

Deric Hollings, LPC, LCSW


 

References:

 

Alzheimer’s Association. (n.d.). Traumatic brain injury (TBI). Retrieved from https://www.alz.org/alzheimers-dementia/what-is-dementia/related_conditions/traumatic-brain-injury

Geesler, K. (2021, March 9). Head injury 25 years later – Penn study finds increased risk of dementia. Penn Medicine. Retrieved from https://www.pennmedicine.org/news/news-releases/2021/march/head-injury-25-years-later-penn-study-finds-increased-risk-of-dementia

Hollings, D. (2024, May 23). A humanistic approach to mental health. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/a-humanistic-approach-to-mental-health

Hollings, D. (2024, May 22). A philosophical approach to mental health. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/a-philosophical-approach-to-mental-health

Hollings, D. (2024, May 24). A scientific approach to mental health. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/a-scientific-approach-to-mental-health

Hollings, D. (2022, October 31). Demandingness. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/demandingness

Hollings, D. (2022, March 15). Disclaimer. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/disclaimer

Hollings, D. (2024, April 26). Eudaimonia. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/eudaimonia

Hollings, D. (2024, April 21). Existentialism. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/existentialism

Hollings, D. (2023, September 8). Fair use. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/fair-use

Hollings, D. (2024, April 2). Four major irrational beliefs. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/four-major-irrational-beliefs

Hollings, D. (2023, October 12). Get better. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/get-better

Hollings, D. (n.d.). Hollings Therapy, LLC [Official website]. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/

Hollings, D. (2023, September 19). Life coaching. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/life-coaching

Hollings, D. (2022, June 23). Meaningful purpose. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/meaningful-purpose

Hollings, D. (2023, September 3). On feelings. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/on-feelings

Hollings, D. (2023, March 20). Practice. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/practice

Hollings, D. (2023, September 15). Psychotherapeutic modalities. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/psychotherapeutic-modalities

Hollings, D. (2022, March 24). Rational emotive behavior therapy (REBT). Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/rational-emotive-behavior-therapy-rebt

Hollings, D. (2022, November 1). Self-disturbance. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/self-disturbance

Hollings, D. (2022, October 7). Should, must, and ought. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/should-must-and-ought

Hollings, D. (2024, April 21). Stoicism. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/stoicism

Hollings, D. (2024, March 19). TBI. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/__tbi

Hollings, D. (2023, September 6). The absence of suffering. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/the-absence-of-suffering

Hollings, D. (2022, December 14). The is-ought problem. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/the-is-ought-problem

Hollings, D. (2023, February 16). Tna. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/tna

Hollings, D. (2022, July 11). Unconditional acceptance. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/unconditional-acceptance

Hollings, D. (2023, March 11). Unconditional life-acceptance. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/unconditional-life-acceptance

Hollings, D. (2023, February 25). Unconditional other-acceptance. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/unconditional-other-acceptance

Hollings, D. (2023, March 1). Unconditional self-acceptance. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/unconditional-self-acceptance

Hollings, D. (2023, September 22). You’re gonna die someday. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/you-re-gonna-die-someday

Mayo Clinic Staff. (n.d.). Dementia. Mayo Foundation for Medical Education and Research. Retrieved from https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/dementia/symptoms-causes/syc-20352013

Mayo Clinic Staff. (2024, February 13). Mild cognitive impairment (MCI). Mayo Foundation for Medical Education and Research. Retrieved from https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/mild-cognitive-impairment/symptoms-causes/syc-20354578

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