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Writer's pictureDeric Hollings

Adages

 

When practicing rational emotive behavior therapy (REBT) with clients, I often encourage people to come up with meaningful adages which may augment the work we do together. An adage is a saying often in metaphorical form that typically embodies a common observation.

 

In a blogpost entitled Unconditional Acceptance, I listed a number of these of the axiomatic tools up with which I was raised. Many adages were imparted to me by my late stepmom, such as, “You’re painting with a broad brush.”

 

In this example, my stepmom cautioned me to consider perspective. When metaphorically painting with a broad brush, I subjected myself, others, and my outlook on life to the element of overgeneralization—making broad assumptions based on limited experience or evidence.

 

Regarding such an illogical and unreasonable (collectively “irrational”) perspective, I stated in a separate blogpost entitled Assumptions:

 

Growing up, I often heard people state about assumptions, “When you ‘assume,’ you make an ‘ass’ out of ‘u’ and ‘me.’.” The saying was intended to discourage people from confidently asserting that their beliefs were true when in fact assumptions may not be at all valid.

 

This adage relates to caution about assumptions and serves as a relatively quick dispute to irrational thinking. As an example, if I irrationally assume that a client completed a homework exercise, I can helpfully remind myself, “When you ‘assume,’ you make an ‘ass’ out of ‘u’ and ‘me.’.”

 

In a separate blogpost entitled All Things, I stated that “when experiencing layered undesirable Activating events, unhelpful Beliefs, and unpleasant Consequences, I’ll disrupt the unproductive belief-consequence connection by repeatedly reminding myself, ‘All things, all things, all things!”

 

This adage pertains to the ABC model and another axiomatic expression imparted to me by my stepmom, “This, too, shall pass.” Regardless of whether a moment is positive, neutral, or negative, it will inevitably pass as all things eventually do. I find this particular tool to be useful.

 

Presuming that you understand how the use of adages may serve as relatively quick challenges to irrational beliefs and other unfavorable ways of thinking, what are some axiomatic sayings which you’ve heard through your life and which may be of meaningful use to you?

 

If you’re looking for a provider who works to help you understand how thinking impacts physical, mental, emotional, and behavioral elements of your life—helping you to sharpen your critical thinking skills, I invite you to reach out today by using the contact widget on my website.

 

As a psychotherapist, I’m pleased to help people with an assortment of issues ranging from anger (hostility, rage, and aggression) to relational issues, adjustment matters, trauma experience, justice involvement, attention-deficit hyperactivity disorder, anxiety and depression, and other mood or personality-related matters.

 

At Hollings Therapy, LLC, serving all of Texas, I aim to treat clients with dignity and respect while offering a multi-lensed approach to the practice of psychotherapy and life coaching. My mission includes: Prioritizing the cognitive and emotive needs of clients, an overall reduction in client suffering, and supporting sustainable growth for the clients I serve. Rather than simply helping you to feel better, I want to help you get better!

 

 

Deric Hollings, LPC, LCSW


 

References:

 

Cookie_studio. (n.d.). Portrait of thoughtful Hispanic man looking aside pondering making decision or choosing standing over white background [Image]. Freepik. Retrieved from https://www.freepik.com/free-photo/portrait-thoughtful-hispanic-man-looking-aside-pondering-making-decision-choosing-standing-white-background_24481213.htm#fromView=search&page=1&position=15&uuid=e37bdcb4-49df-4004-ae5c-c9e1f179a59b

Hollings, D. (2024, October 18). ABC model. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/abc-model

Hollings, D. (2024, September 20). All things. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/all-things

Hollings, D. (2024, November 15). Assumptions. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/assumptions

Hollings, D. (2023, February 20). Dipping into layers. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/dipping-into-layers

Hollings, D. (2022, March 15). Disclaimer. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/disclaimer

Hollings, D. (2023, September 8). Fair use. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/fair-use

Hollings, D. (2023, October 12). Get better. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/get-better

Hollings, D. (n.d.). Hollings Therapy, LLC [Official website]. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/

Hollings, D. (2024, April 18). Homework. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/homework

Hollings, D. (2023, May 18). Irrational beliefs. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/irrational-beliefs

Hollings, D. (2024, November 8). Is your fear valid? Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/is-your-fear-valid

Hollings, D. (2023, September 19). Life coaching. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/life-coaching

Hollings, D. (2023, January 8). Logic and reason. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/logic-and-reason

Hollings, D. (2022, June 23). Meaningful purpose. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/meaningful-purpose

Hollings, D. (2024, April 22). On disputing. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/on-disputing

Hollings, D. (2023, September 3). On feelings. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/on-feelings

Hollings, D. (2023, April 24). On truth. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/on-truth

Hollings, D. (2022, March 24). Rational emotive behavior therapy (REBT). Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/rational-emotive-behavior-therapy-rebt

Hollings, D. (2022, December 25). The B-C connection. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/the-b-c-connection

Hollings, D. (2024, May 14). This, too, shall pass. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/this-too-shall-pass

Hollings, D. (2023, September 19). Unconditional acceptance. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/unconditional-acceptance-1

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