Fence-Sitting

[DISCLAIMER]

Within my blog, I tend to discuss controversial topics. When doing so, I offer my opinions on various matters such as transgender issues, the likely genocide or ethnic cleansing carried out by Israel, racism within the United States, inequality of conscription policies, politics, etc.

In this way, it’s not valid for others to claim that I tend toward fence-sitting—a state of indecision or neutrality with respect to conflicting positions. Still, I wonder what you think about so-called fence-sitters—people who remain neutral or undecided in a controversy.

Is it immoral and unethical for individuals simply to remain neutral while not self-disturbing about ever-changing matters of the world? Why must anyone hold an opinion about anything? When further contemplating this matter, I’m reminded of a book I’ve been steadily reading.

As Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy (REBT) is informed by Stoic philosophy, this blog entry is part of an ongoing series regarding a book entitled The Daily Stoic: 366 Meditations on Wisdom, Perseverance, and the Art of Living by Ryan Holiday and Stephen Hanselman.

The authors quote ancient Stoic philosopher Marcus Aurelius who stated, “We have the power to hold no opinion about a thing and to not let it upset our state of mind—for things have no natural power to shape our judgments” (page 55). Do you have an opinion on Aurelius’s perspective?

Suppose you took no position on the ancient Roman emperor’s outlook, as you simply remained neutral. Do you maintain that your fence-sitting behavior is worthy of condemnation? I don’t. Regarding this topic, authors of The Daily Stoic state (page 55):

Here’s a funny exercise: think about all the upsetting things you don’t know about—stuff people might have said about you behind your back, mistakes you might have made that never came to your attention, things you dropped or lost without even realizing it. What’s your reaction? You don’t have one because you don’t know about it.

Are you willing to entertain the thought exercise proposed by the authors? Can you imagine a time when you may’ve had something stuck in your teeth, had toilet paper clinging to your shoe, or an unmemorable moment during which you unwittingly passed gas in front of other people?

Any of these scenarios are plausible. Still, I wonder if in this moment you’re willing to take a hardline position about your behavior during some historical time. If not, why mustn’t you fence-sit in this regard? Finalizing their outlook, authors of The Daily Stoic conclude (page 55):

In other words, it is possible to hold no opinion about a negative thing. You just need to cultivate that power instead of wielding it accidentally. Especially when having an opinion is likely to make us aggravated.

Practice the ability of having absolutely no thoughts about something—act as if you had no idea it ever occurred. Or that you’ve never heard of it before. Let it become irrelevant or nonexistent to you. It’ll be a lot less powerful this way.

Admittedly, it’s easier to ignore a perspective on imaginary historical events, such as accidentally farting in front of other people, than to intentionally take no position on the apparent terroristic actions of Israel. Taking a position on the slaughter of innocents can be hard.

If you choose to hold no option, then I invite you to engage in fence-sitting that may be criticized by others. I, too, do so in regard to most matters I encounter through media sources. As long as you view your action regarding inaction as one of empowerment, then fence-sit away!

If you’re looking for a provider who tries to work to help understand how thinking impacts physical, mental, emotional, and behavioral elements of your life—helping you to sharpen your critical thinking skills, I invite you to reach out today by using the contact widget on my website.

As a psychotherapist, I’m pleased to try to help people with an assortment of issues ranging from anger (hostility, rage, and aggression) to relational issues, adjustment matters, trauma experience, justice involvement, attention-deficit hyperactivity disorder, anxiety and depression, and other mood or personality-related matters.

At Hollings Therapy, LLC, serving all of Texas, I aim to treat clients with dignity and respect while offering a multi-lensed approach to the practice of psychotherapy and life coaching. My mission includes: Prioritizing the cognitive and emotive needs of clients, an overall reduction in client suffering, and supporting sustainable growth for the clients I serve. Rather than simply trying to help you to feel better, I want to try to help you get better!

Deric Hollings, LPC, LCSW

References:

Daily Stoic. (n.d.). Translating the Stoics: An interview with “The Daily Stoic” co-author Stephen Hanselman. Retrieved from https://dailystoic.com/stephen-hanselman-interview/

Holiday, R. and Hanselman, S. (2016). The daily stoic: 366 meditations on wisdom, perseverance, and the art of living. Penguin Random House LLC. Retrieved from https://www.pdfdrive.com/the-daily-stoic-366-meditations-on-wisdom-perseverance-and-the-art-of-living-d61378067.html

Hollings, D. (2022, September 21). Acting as if. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/acting-as-if

Hollings, D. (2022, March 15). Disclaimer. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/disclaimer

Hollings, D. (2024, December 30). Empowerment. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/empowerment

Hollings, D. (2025, February 11). Ethnic cleansing. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/ethnic-cleansing

Hollings, D. (2024, May 17). Feeling better vs. getting better. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/feeling-better-vs-getting-better-1

Hollings, D. (2024, January 27). Genocide. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/genocide

Hollings, D. (2023, October 12). Get better. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/get-better

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Hollings, D. (2025, April 23). Judgment. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/judgment

Hollings, D. (2023, September 19). Life coaching. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/life-coaching

Hollings, D. (2024, April 3). Maybe you’re the racist. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/maybe-you-re-the-racist

Hollings, D. (2024, November 6). Media. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/media

Hollings, D. (2024, October 14). Mistakes. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/mistakes

Hollings, D. (2023, October 2). Morals and ethics. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/morals-and-ethics

Hollings, D. (2024, November 18). Opinions. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/opinions

Hollings, D. (2024, May 5). Psychotherapist. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/psychotherapist

Hollings, D. (2022, March 24). Rational emotive behavior therapy (REBT). Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/rational-emotive-behavior-therapy-rebt

Hollings, D. (2024, July 10). Recommendatory should beliefs. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/recommendatory-should-beliefs

Hollings, D. (2024, January 20). Reliability vs. validity. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/reliability-vs-validity

Hollings, D. (2022, November 1). Self-disturbance. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/self-disturbance

Hollings, D. (2025, May 25). Shootin’. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/shootin

Hollings, D. (2022, October 7). Should, must, and ought. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/should-must-and-ought

Hollings, D. (2024, April 21). Stoicism. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/stoicism

Hollings, D. (2022, August 12). Swimming in controversial belief. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/swimming-in-controversial-belief

Hollings, D. (2022, August 27). The lowering tide. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/the-lowering-tide

Hollings, D. (2025, February 28). To try is my goal. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/to-try-is-my-goal

Hollings, D. (2024, July 3). What equality? Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/what-equality

Wikipedia. (n.d.). Marcus Aurelius. Retrieved from https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Marcus_Aurelius

Wikipedia. (n.d.). Ryan Holiday. Retrieved from https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ryan_Holiday