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All Things Are Mutually Woven Together

  • Writer: Deric Hollings
    Deric Hollings
  • 1 day ago
  • 5 min read

Photo credit, Designed by Magnific, fair use

 

Growing up, I observed many women engage in the act of quilting (the process of joining a minimum of three layers of fabric together either through stitching manually using a needle and thread, or mechanically with a sewing machine or specialized longarm quilting system).

 

These mostly conservative-leaning quilters gathered together in small clusters, arranging colorful patterns of individual patchwork pieces which were sewn or stitched together in one unified quilting project. As such, it wasn’t unusual to see elaborate quilts within the homes I visited.

 

Some quilts were used as covers on beds. Others were hung on walls. Often, handcrafted quilts were exchanged during holidays and other occasions. Also, there appeared to have been an unwritten rule about store-bought versus human-made quilts.

 

The former was generally dismissed as lazy, though the latter was revered for its meticulous detail, original patterns, time-consuming endeavors, and overall contribution by various women who engaged in quilting. Reflecting upon that time in my life, I now think of a book.

 

As Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy (REBT) is informed by Stoic philosophy, this blog entry is part of an ongoing series regarding a book entitled The Daily Stoic: 366 Meditations on Wisdom, Perseverance, and the Art of Living by Ryan Holiday and Stephen Hanselman.

 

One of the central themes of quilting espoused by the women I observed in my youth was that all things were interconnected (mutually joined or related) with mutual (directed by each toward the other or the others) interdependence (the state of being dependent upon one another).

 

For example, woman X contributed her square or rectangle. If woman Y’s piece of fabric didn’t match the quilt theme of woman X’s, then the final product would be considered undesirable to the eyes. Also, some fabrics weren’t used (e.g., silk) while others were favored (e.g., cotton).

 

With interconnectedness and mutual interdependence, quilts were woven together using intentionally elaborate themes which meshed well together. Addressing a similar perspective on life, authors of The Daily Stoic quote Marcus Aurelius who stated (page 302):

 

Meditate often on the interconnectedness and mutual interdependence of all things in the universe. For in a sense, all things are mutually woven together and therefore have an affinity for each other—for one thing follows after another according to their tension of movement, their sympathetic stirrings, and the unity of all substance.

 

What the women of my youth taught me, even if only through a secondhand observational lesson, was that to which Aurelius alluded. We are all connected in one way or another. About this view, authors of The Daily Stoic state (page 302):

 

Anne Lamott once observed that all writers “are little rivers running into one lake,” all contributing to the same big project. The same is true in many industries—though sadly, even inside the same company, people selfishly forget they’re working together. As human beings we all breathe the atoms that made up our ancestors and flow into the same earth when we die.

 

One of the women from my youth once said something to me along the lines of, “You know, we’re drinking the same water that the pharaohs once drank.” She elaborated by suggesting, similar to what the authors stated, that the atoms shared throughout history were connected.

 

Although it may be fashionable in some societal enclaves to express how each individual is an island unto oneself, this simply isn’t a fact. Even I—one who favors a staunch individualist outlook on life—can recognize this! Of a connected view, the authors conclude (page 302):

 

Over and over again, the Stoics reminded themselves of the interconnectedness of life. Perhaps that was because life in Greece and Rome was particularly harsh. Animals and people were slaughtered senselessly to amuse the masses in the Colosseum (events lamented in the Stoic writings).

 

Countries were conquered and its citizens sold into slavery to expand the empire (the futility of which the Stoics also lamented). This kind of cruelty is possible only when we forget how we’re related to our fellow human beings and the environment. Today, take a moment to remember that we are woven together and that each of us plays a role (good, bad, or ugly) in this world.

 

Even if you never take part in a quilting circle, you’re still connected to the women of my past through our exchange of shared atoms. All things are mutually woven together—you, me, the women of my past, and even your enemies. Now, I invite you to contemplate this fact of life.

 

If you’re looking for a provider who tries to work to help understand how thinking impacts physical, mental, emotional, and behavioral elements of your life—helping you to sharpen your critical thinking skills, I invite you to reach out today by using the contact widget on my website.

 

As a psychotherapist, I’m pleased to try to help people with an assortment of issues ranging from anger (hostility, rage, and aggression) to relational issues, adjustment matters, trauma experience, justice involvement, attention-deficit hyperactivity disorder, anxiety and depression, and other mood or personality-related matters.

 

At Hollings Therapy, LLC, serving all of Texas, I aim to treat clients with dignity and respect while offering a multi-lensed approach to the practice of psychotherapy and life coaching. My mission includes: Prioritizing the cognitive and emotive needs of clients, an overall reduction in client suffering, and supporting sustainable growth for the clients I serve. Rather than simply trying to help you to feel better, I want to try to help you get better!

 

 

Deric Hollings, LPC, LCSW

 

References:

 

Daily Stoic. (n.d.). Translating the Stoics: An interview with “The Daily Stoic” co-author Stephen Hanselman. Retrieved from https://dailystoic.com/stephen-hanselman-interview/

Holiday, R. and Hanselman, S. (2016). The daily stoic: 366 meditations on wisdom, perseverance, and the art of living. Penguin Random House LLC. Retrieved from https://www.pdfdrive.com/the-daily-stoic-366-meditations-on-wisdom-perseverance-and-the-art-of-living-d61378067.html

Hollings, D. (2022, March 15). Disclaimer. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/disclaimer

Hollings, D. (2023, September 8). Fair use. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/fair-use

Hollings, D. (2024, May 17). Feeling better vs. getting better. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/feeling-better-vs-getting-better-1

Hollings, D. (2023, October 12). Get better. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/get-better

Hollings, D. (n.d.). Hollings Therapy, LLC [Official website]. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/

Hollings, D. (2026, March 11). Just the facts. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/just-the-facts

Hollings, D. (2023, September 19). Life coaching. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/life-coaching

Hollings, D. (2023, April 24). On truth. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/on-truth

Hollings, D. (2024, May 5). Psychotherapist. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/psychotherapist

Hollings, D. (2022, March 24). Rational emotive behavior therapy (REBT). Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/rational-emotive-behavior-therapy-rebt

Hollings, D. (2026, March 5). Rules-based order: Rules will vary. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/rules-based-order-rules-will-vary

Hollings, D. (2024, April 21). Stoicism. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/stoicism

Hollings, D. (2026, April 6). The big ‘L’. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/the-big-l

Hollings, D. (2025, February 28). To try is my goal. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/to-try-is-my-goal

Wikipedia. (n.d.). Anne Lamott. Retrieved from https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anne_Lamott

Wikipedia. (n.d.). Individualism. Retrieved from https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Individualism

Wikipedia. (n.d.). Longarm quilting. Retrieved from https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Longarm_quilting

Wikipedia. (n.d.). Marcus Aurelius. Retrieved from https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Marcus_Aurelius

Wikipedia. (n.d.). Quilting. Retrieved from https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Quilting

Wikipedia. (n.d.). Ryan Holiday. Retrieved from https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ryan_Holiday

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