Two Ears and Only One Mouth

[DISCLAIMER]

Photo credit, fair use

As Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy (REBT) is informed by Stoic philosophy, this blog entry is part of an ongoing series regarding a book entitled The Daily Stoic: 366 Meditations on Wisdom, Perseverance, and the Art of Living by Ryan Holiday and Stephen Hanselman.

Authors of The Daily Stoic quote Diogenes Laertius, biographer of the Greek philosophers, who stated, “To the youngster talking nonsense Zeno said, ‘The reason why we have two ears and only one mouth is so we might listen more and talk less’” (page 187).

This is wisdom (accumulated philosophical or scientific learning) that I preferably should keep in mind. Particularly, when working with clients during teletherapy sessions, I would do well to remember Zeno’s axiom. To be blunt, I sometimes talk too much. (Is anyone surprised by this?)

Regarding Zeno’s wisdom, authors of The Daily Stoic question, “Why do the wise have so few problems compared with the rest of us?” (page 187). I’m not convinced of this assumption—that wise people have fewer problems than “the rest of us.” What evidence is there for this claim?

Rather than exhuming a significant amount of information to counteract this questionable claim, I’m cognizant of the fact that I’ve openly admitted I “sometimes talk too much.” Therefore, I’ll instead listen to what authors of The Daily Stoic have to say about their position (page 187):

There are a few simple reasons. First, the wise seem to manage expectations as much as possible. They rarely expect what isn’t possible in the first place.

Second, the wise always consider both the best and worst case scenarios. They don’t just think about what they wish to happen, but also what very realistically can happen if things were to suddenly turn.

Third, the wise act with a reverse clause—meaning that they not only consider what might go wrong, but they are prepared for that to be exactly what they want to happen—it is an opportunity for excellence and virtue.

And if you follow it today, you too will find that nothing surprises you or happens contrary to your expectations.

I concur with a balance of one’s preferences and expectations. Regarding all the rest, I’ll remain mindful of my two ears and only one mouth. If you find value in the unsubstantiated claims of the authors, then good! May their assumptions which lack evidential support serve you well.

If you’re looking for a provider who tries to work to help understand how thinking impacts physical, mental, emotional, and behavioral elements of your life—helping you to sharpen your critical thinking skills, I invite you to reach out today by using the contact widget on my website.

As a psychotherapist, I’m pleased to try to help people with an assortment of issues ranging from anger (hostility, rage, and aggression) to relational issues, adjustment matters, trauma experience, justice involvement, attention-deficit hyperactivity disorder, anxiety and depression, and other mood or personality-related matters.

At Hollings Therapy, LLC, serving all of Texas, I aim to treat clients with dignity and respect while offering a multi-lensed approach to the practice of psychotherapy and life coaching. My mission includes: Prioritizing the cognitive and emotive needs of clients, an overall reduction in client suffering, and supporting sustainable growth for the clients I serve. Rather than simply trying to help you to feel better, I want to try to help you get better!

Deric Hollings, LPC, LCSW

References:

Daily Stoic. (n.d.). Translating the Stoics: An interview with “The Daily Stoic” co-author Stephen Hanselman. Retrieved from https://dailystoic.com/stephen-hanselman-interview/

Easy.Peasy.AI. (2025, August 9). Zeno of Cyprus: The father of Stoicism in Greek philosophy [Image]. Retrieved from https://easy-peasy.ai/ai-image-generator/images/zeno-cyprus-greek-philosopher-stoicism-founder

Holiday, R. and Hanselman, S. (2016). The daily stoic: 366 meditations on wisdom, perseverance, and the art of living. Penguin Random House LLC. Retrieved from https://www.pdfdrive.com/the-daily-stoic-366-meditations-on-wisdom-perseverance-and-the-art-of-living-d61378067.html

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Hollings, D. (2022, June 20). Teletherapy. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/teletherapy

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Wikipedia. (n.d.). Diogenes Laertius. Retrieved from https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Diogenes_Laertius

Wikipedia. (n.d.). Ryan Holiday. Retrieved from https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ryan_Holiday

Wikipedia. (n.d.). Zeno (emperor). Retrieved from https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Zeno_(emperor)