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Virtue Makes Adversities Bearable

  • Writer: Deric Hollings
    Deric Hollings
  • 3 days ago
  • 6 min read

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When enlisting in the United States (U.S.) Marine Corps (1996), I didn’t think much of virtue (conformity to a standard of moral and ethical right or wrong). Ergo, though there were a number of reasons why I chose military service, virtue wasn’t my justification.

 

Without expounding upon my particular knowledge at the time, it’s worth noting that I knew I could take a human life if necessary. After all, by that point in my life, I was quite familiar with adversity (a state or instance of serious or continued difficulty or misfortune).

 

Thus, killing for a cause was something I considered bearable (capable of being borne—the past participle of bear: to accept or allow oneself to be subjected to especially without giving way). When thinking about this matter at present, I’m reminded of a book that I’ve been reading.

 

As Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy (REBT) is informed by Stoic philosophy, this blog entry is part of an ongoing series regarding a book entitled The Daily Stoic: 366 Meditations on Wisdom, Perseverance, and the Art of Living by Ryan Holiday and Stephen Hanselman.

 

It’s worth noting that when enlisting in the Corps, I didn’t experience psychopathy (mental disorder, especially when marked by egocentric and antisocial activity, a lack of remorse for one’s actions, an absence of empathy for others, and often criminal tendencies).

 

Rather, I was willing and able to do what perhaps most members of a civilized society are unwilling and unable to do. To better understand the internal mechanism that afforded me this capability, consider that authors of The Daily Stoic quote Seneca who stated (page 96):

 

I may wish to be free from torture, but if the time comes for me to endure it, I’ll wish to bear it courageously with bravery and honor. Wouldn’t I prefer not to fall into war? But if war does befall me, I’ll wish to carry nobly the wounds, starvation, and other necessities of war.

 

Neither am I so crazy as to desire illness, but if I must suffer illness, I’ll wish to do nothing rash or dishonorable. The point is not to wish for these adversities, but for the virtue that makes adversities bearable.

 

Although virtue didn’t factor into my decision to join the military, it was acquired virtue once I served as a Marine that provided me a perspective similar to that of Seneca. I didn’t wish for or prefer to experience adversities. Yet, I was prepared to bear them for the sake of a cause.

 

All these years later, I think about how misguided I was regarding military service. There’s no way I’d currently volunteer to give my life, or take another life, in support of U.S. politicians who mainly serve large corporations. What virtue is there in warmongering?

 

Nevertheless, I don’t regret the lessons I learned along the way. Moreover, I now maintain a similar outlook concerning that expressed by authors of The Daily Stoic who state (page 96):

 

President James Garfield was a great man—raised in humble circumstances, self-educated, and eventually a Civil War hero—whose presidency was cut short by an assassin’s bullet. In his brief time in office, he faced a bitterly divided country as well as a bitterly and internally divided Republican Party.

 

During one fight, which challenged the very authority of his office, he stood firm, telling an adviser: “Of course I deprecate war, but if it is brought to my door the bringer will find me at home.”

 

I, too, remain prepared to carry out actions which were associated with my military service – though on my own behalf, rather than for immoral and unethical plans from those in positions of oppressive power. Thus, the bringer of violence to my door will find me at home.

 

Make no mistake about it, I don’t wish for or prefer to experience adversities. All the same, I remain willing and able to do what perhaps most members of a civilized society are unwilling and unable to do. About this perspective, authors of The Daily Stoic conclude (page 96):

 

We’d be crazy to want to face difficulty in life. But we’d be equally crazy to pretend that it isn’t going to happen. Which is why when it knocks on our door—as it very well may this morning—let’s make sure we’re prepared to answer.

 

Not the way we are when a surprise visitor comes late at night, but the way we are when we’re waiting for an important guest: dressed, in the right head space, ready to go.

 

Personally, I’m prepared to answer the proverbial knock upon my door either way. Be it an unwelcome visitor that chooses violence on a particular morning, or a surprise visitor late at night with a mistaken address, I stay in the “right head space, ready to go.” How about you?

 

If you’re looking for a provider who tries to work to help understand how thinking impacts physical, mental, emotional, and behavioral elements of your life—helping you to sharpen your critical thinking skills, I invite you to reach out today by using the contact widget on my website.

 

As a psychotherapist, I’m pleased to try to help people with an assortment of issues ranging from anger (hostility, rage, and aggression) to relational issues, adjustment matters, trauma experience, justice involvement, attention-deficit hyperactivity disorder, anxiety and depression, and other mood or personality-related matters.

 

At Hollings Therapy, LLC, serving all of Texas, I aim to treat clients with dignity and respect while offering a multi-lensed approach to the practice of psychotherapy and life coaching. My mission includes: Prioritizing the cognitive and emotive needs of clients, an overall reduction in client suffering, and supporting sustainable growth for the clients I serve. Rather than simply trying to help you to feel better, I want to try to help you get better!

 

 

Deric Hollings, LPC, LCSW

 

References:

 

Daily Stoic. (n.d.). Translating the Stoics: An interview with “The Daily Stoic” co-author Stephen Hanselman. Retrieved from https://dailystoic.com/stephen-hanselman-interview/

Holiday, R. and Hanselman, S. (2016). The daily stoic: 366 meditations on wisdom, perseverance, and the art of living. Penguin Random House LLC. Retrieved from https://www.pdfdrive.com/the-daily-stoic-366-meditations-on-wisdom-perseverance-and-the-art-of-living-d61378067.html

Hollings, D. (2024, September 14). Crazy. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/crazy

Hollings, D. (2024, October 21). Desire. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/desire

Hollings, D. (2022, March 15). Disclaimer. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/disclaimer

Hollings, D. (2024, July 10). Empirical should beliefs. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/empirical-should-beliefs

Hollings, D. (2024, May 17). Feeling better vs. getting better. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/feeling-better-vs-getting-better-1

Hollings, D. (2023, October 12). Get better. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/get-better

Hollings, D. (n.d.). Hollings Therapy, LLC [Official website]. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/

Hollings, D. (2025, March 4). Justification. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/justification

Hollings, D. (2023, September 19). Life coaching. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/life-coaching

Hollings, D. (2023, October 2). Morals and ethics. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/morals-and-ethics

Hollings, D. (2023, November 25). No ragrets. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/no-ragrets

Hollings, D. (2022, October 22). On empathy. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/on-empathy

Hollings, D. (2024, June 16). On virtue. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/on-virtue

Hollings, D. (2025, April 25). Preferences vs. expectations. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/preferences-vs-expectations

Hollings, D. (2024, March 6). Psychopathy. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/psychopathy

Hollings, D. (2024, May 5). Psychotherapist. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/psychotherapist

Hollings, D. (2022, March 24). Rational emotive behavior therapy (REBT). Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/rational-emotive-behavior-therapy-rebt

Hollings, D. (2024, December 5). Reasoning. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/reasoning

Hollings, D. (2024, April 21). Stoicism. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/stoicism

Hollings, D. (2025, June 11). Stop the violence. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/stop-the-violence

Hollings, D. (2025, February 28). To try is my goal. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/to-try-is-my-goal

Hollings, D. (2024, April 17). Wishes, dreams, and goals. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/wishes-dreams-and-goals

Wikipedia. (n.d.). American Civil War. Retrieved from https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/American_Civil_War

Wikipedia. (n.d.). James A. Garfield. Retrieved from https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/James_A._Garfield

Wikipedia. (n.d.). Ryan Holiday. Retrieved from https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ryan_Holiday

Wikipedia. (n.d.). Seneca the Younger. Retrieved from https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Seneca_the_Younger

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