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Griping, Whining, Bitching, Moaning, Complaining Whinging, Venting, Etc.

  • Writer: Deric Hollings
    Deric Hollings
  • Jun 15
  • 5 min read

 

I often hear of people relating the practice of care for mental, emotional, and behavioral health to the action of griping, whining, bitching, moaning, complaining, whinging, venting, etc. While I get how this misconception persists, psychotherapy (i.e., talk therapy) can entail more than this.

 

For context, to “gripe” is to complain with grumbling. To “whine” is to utter a high-pitched plaintive or distressed cry. To “bitch” is to protest about something that is perceived to be extremely difficult, objectionable, or unpleasant. To “moan” is to bewail audibly.

 

To “complain” is to express grief, pain, or discontent. To “whinge” is to complain fretfully. To “vent” is to give often vigorous or emotional expression to. Essentially, each of these terms synonymously represents the same experience.

 

When in talk therapy, an individual can lament (to mourn aloud) about various matters with one disagrees while experiencing catharsis (the process or effect of releasing, and thereby providing relief from, strong or repressed emotions). In essence, one feels better when venting in this way.

 

Although some practitioners of various psychotherapeutic modalities condone this approach to health care, Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy (REBT) focuses on helping people get better – not to merely experience transient symptom relief. Thus, REBT is a method of rational living.

 

For context, forgive me a personal anecdote from my professional background. Years ago, I had a client whose apparent main goal for seeking out my services was to tell “stories.” In fact, this individual stated as much.

 

The client received my initial informed consent documentation that described REBT techniques related to the ABC model and unconditional acceptance. With these tools, an individual learns to significantly reduce self-disturbance associated with irrational beliefs.

 

As well, I advocated understanding of, belief in, and daily practice of REBT techniques in order to become proficient enough with this method in order to get better. However, my former client ostensibly wasn’t interested in anything other than feeling better during our sessions.

 

This person didn’t complete negotiated homework tasks, neglected use of REBT tools, and would present to session for “story time” as an expressed objective. Morally and ethically, I was uncomfortable with taking someone’s money while simply listening to lamentation about life.

 

When discussing the matter of griping, whining, bitching, moaning, complaining, whinging, venting, etc. with the client, this individual decided on going elsewhere for treatment or management of symptoms. Thus, my moral and ethical quandary resolved itself.

 

Looking back, I give kudos to my former client for taking self-determined and autonomous advocacy steps which were displayed during our abrupt final session. I imagine it took some degree of courage to own up to the fact that this person didn’t want to actually get better.

 

Because I’m not beholden to a quest for financial gain, I was content when the client unexpectedly terminated our sessions. All these years later, I’m now able to share this anecdote with you as a matter of a psychoeducational lesson.

 

Mourning aloud about various disagreeable elements of life may feel better than keeping the information within your mind. However, you aren’t likely to get better from a cognitive, emotive, sensational, or behavioral standpoint. Over 50 years of evidence supports this fact.

 

Of course, you have personal agency and can choose a feel-better rather than get-better approach to life. If so, I imagine you won’t experience difficulty finding a psychotherapist who’ll take your money and listen to you gripe, whine, bitch, moan, complain, whinge, vent, etc.

 

If you’re looking for a provider who tries to work to help understand how thinking impacts physical, mental, emotional, and behavioral elements of your life—helping you to sharpen your critical thinking skills, I invite you to reach out today by using the contact widget on my website.

 

As a psychotherapist, I’m pleased to try to help people with an assortment of issues ranging from anger (hostility, rage, and aggression) to relational issues, adjustment matters, trauma experience, justice involvement, attention-deficit hyperactivity disorder, anxiety and depression, and other mood or personality-related matters.

 

At Hollings Therapy, LLC, serving all of Texas, I aim to treat clients with dignity and respect while offering a multi-lensed approach to the practice of psychotherapy and life coaching. My mission includes: Prioritizing the cognitive and emotive needs of clients, an overall reduction in client suffering, and supporting sustainable growth for the clients I serve. Rather than simply trying to help you to feel better, I want to try to help you get better!

 

 

Deric Hollings, LPC, LCSW


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References:

 

David, D., Cotet, C., Matu, S., Mogoase, C., and Stefan, S. (2017, September 12). 50 years of rational-emotive and cognitive-behavioral therapy: A systematic review and meta-analysis. Journal of Clinical Psychology. Retrieved from https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/28898411/

Hollings, D. (2025, May 7). C is for contentment and that’s good enough for me. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/c-is-for-contentment-and-that-s-good-enough-for-me

Hollings, D. (2024, November 10). Catharsis. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/catharsis

Hollings, D. (2024, October 29). Cognitive continuum. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/cognitive-continuum

Hollings, D. (2022, March 15). Disclaimer. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/disclaimer

Hollings, D. (2025, March 2). Disturbed about symptoms. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/disturbed-about-symptoms

Hollings, D. (2023, September 8). Fair use. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/fair-use

Hollings, D. (2024, May 17). Feeling better vs. getting better. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/feeling-better-vs-getting-better-1

Hollings, D. (2025, March 5). Five major characteristics of four major irrational beliefs. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/five-major-characteristics-of-four-major-irrational-beliefs

Hollings, D. (2023, October 12). Get better. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/get-better

Hollings, D. (2024, April 13). Goals. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/goals

Hollings, D. (n.d.). Hollings Therapy, LLC [Official website]. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/

Hollings, D. (2024, May 27). Intellectual vs. emotional insight. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/intellectual-vs-emotional-insight

Hollings, D. (2024, January 2). Interests and goals. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/interests-and-goals

Hollings, D. (2023, September 19). Life coaching. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/life-coaching

Hollings, D. (2024, March 4). Mental, emotional, and behavioral health. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/mental-emotional-and-behavioral-health

Hollings, D. (2023, October 2). Morals and ethics. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/morals-and-ethics

Hollings, D. (2024, June 2). Nonadaptive behavior. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/nonadaptive-behavior

Hollings, D. (2024, February 24). Personal agency. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/personal-agency

Hollings, D. (2022, November 7). Personal ownership. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/personal-ownership

Hollings, D. (2024, January 1). Psychoeducation. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/psychoeducation

Hollings, D. (2023, September 15). Psychotherapeutic modalities. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/psychotherapeutic-modalities

Hollings, D. (2024, May 5). Psychotherapist. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/psychotherapist

Hollings, D. (2022, March 24). Rational emotive behavior therapy (REBT). Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/rational-emotive-behavior-therapy-rebt

Hollings, D. (2024, May 15). Rational living. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/rational-living

Hollings, D. (2024, May 19). Rationale for homework. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/rationale-for-homework

Hollings, D. (2024, March 14). REBT and emotions. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/rebt-and-emotions

Hollings, D. (2024, May 26). Self-determination and autonomy. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/self-determination-and-autonomy

Hollings, D. (2022, November 1). Self-disturbance. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/self-disturbance

Hollings, D. (2024, April 21). Sensation. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/sensation

Hollings, D. (2025, February 28). To try is my goal. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/to-try-is-my-goal

Hollings, D. (2025, January 9). Traditional ABC model. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/traditional-abc-model

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Hollings, D. (2024, October 20). Unconditional acceptance redux. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/unconditional-acceptance-redux

Hollings, D. (2024, January 16). Understanding, belief, and practice. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/understanding-belief-and-practice

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