All I Do Is Win

[DISCLAIMER]

I sat at a table in Torchy’s Tacos and awaited my takeout order when five multiracial males of approximately middle to high school age entered the restaurant. “Attention, Torchy’s,” one of the males stated, “I’m an up and coming rapper from Pflugerville. Can I have your attention?”

I was intrigued to hear what he had to say, as one of the other males recorded or livestreamed the event on his smartphone. “I wanna perform ‘All I Do Is Win,’ by DJ Khaled,” the aspiring rapper continued, “Sing along if you know the lyrics.”

Released on DJ Khaled’s 2010 album Victory, “All I Do Is Win” features vocalist T-Pain and rappers Ludacris, Snoop Dogg, and Rick Ross. It was a popular song upon its release, as the ambitious rapper in Torchy’s sang the chorus with three other males:

All I do is win, win, win, no matter what (What)

Got money on my mind, I can never get enough (‘Nough)

And every time I step up in the building, everybody hands go up

And they stay there (There)

And they say, “Yeah!” (Yeah!), and they stay there

(Up, down, up, down, up, down)

‘Cause all I do is win (Win), win (Win), win

And if you goin’ in, put your hands in the air, make ‘em stay there

Apparently not enthused about the spontaneous entertainment, most people in Torchy’s simply ignored the youths. Alternatively, I paid close attention and contemplated the shame attacking element of the aspirant rapper’s behavior.

In Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy (REBT), the tool of shame attacking exercises is quite useful at addressing self-disturbance associated with perceived rejection regarding one’s own behavior in a public setting. Expanding upon this helpful tool, one source states:

Shame attacking exercises are behavioral exposure assignments that have people perform behaviors that they fear or experience shame about doing. Perhaps the title shame attack is a misnomer, as people often experience social anxiety about doing these behaviors. The exercise has three goals.

First and most important, is to provide experiences that proves that you can act against your emotions, survive the discomfort, and behave as you planned despite unhealthy negative emotions.

Second, it convinces you that even if people dislike or disapprove of you for your behavior, it is not awful and you can stand their disapproval.

Third and least important, it teaches us that most people do not even notice what we do, and we exaggerate the disapproval and reject we expect.

I contemplated the hopeful rapper’s actions at Torchy’s Tacos as something of a shame attacking exercise. If he’s serious about wanting to perform in front of crowds, then rigorously subjecting himself to potential rejection in smaller venues may help him tolerate uncomfortable distress.

All last week, when visiting friends for their daughter’s high school graduation, I also performed shame attacking exercises throughout my trip. In particular, I wore carnival t-shirts which I purchased in Rio de Janeiro, Brasil when attending these elaborate events in 2000 and 2001.

Featured in the above photo is one of the t-shirts I wore last week, as this picture was taken in 2002, when I was stationed at Marine Corps Air Station Miramar, San Diego, California. Donning various carnival shirts on my trip, I subjected myself to perceived rejection from others.

Thankfully, a friend of the graduating senior I was visiting said, “That’s a really ugly shirt, but I love it!” My shame attacking exercise was a success. After all, I learned that I could stand unpleasant emotions and rejection-based comments, and even find satisfaction in the process.

Hopefully the up and coming rapper at Torchy’s also found meaning in his endeavor yesterday. Props to him for facing potential rejection! As far as I’m concerned, the young male has already won, won, won, won, won, à la the DJ Khaled song.

Considering the value of shame attacking exercises, what method of facing potential rejection are you willing to undergo? May you also win, win, win, win, win, and happy shame attacking to you!

If you’re looking for a provider who tries to work to help you understand how thinking impacts physical, mental, emotional, and behavioral elements of your life, I invite you to reach out today by using the contact widget on my website.

As the world’s foremost hip hop-influenced REBT psychotherapist, I’m pleased to try to help people with an assortment of issues from anger (hostility, rage, and aggression) to relational issues, adjustment matters, trauma experience, justice involvement, attention-deficit hyperactivity disorder, anxiety and depression, and other mood or personality-related matters.

At Hollings Therapy, LLC, serving all of Texas, I aim to treat clients with dignity and respect while offering a multi-lensed approach to the practice of psychotherapy and life coaching. My mission includes: Prioritizing the cognitive and emotive needs of clients, an overall reduction in client suffering, and supporting sustainable growth for the clients I serve. Rather than simply trying to help you to feel better, I want to try to help you get better!

Deric Hollings, LPC, LCSW

References:

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MNRK Music Group. (2010, March 3). DJ Khaled - All I Do Is Win feat. Ludacris, Rick Ross, T-Pain & Snoop Dogg (Official music video) [Video]. YouTube. Retrieved from https://youtu.be/GGXzlRoNtHU?si=tZ0gwA0NvfXoGXzV

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