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It Is in Your Power Not to Want What You Don't Have

  • Writer: Deric Hollings
    Deric Hollings
  • 2 days ago
  • 4 min read

 

As Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy (REBT) is informed by Stoic philosophy, this blog entry is part of an ongoing series regarding a book entitled The Daily Stoic: 366 Meditations on Wisdom, Perseverance, and the Art of Living by Ryan Holiday and Stephen Hanselman.

 

The authors quote ancient Stoic philosopher Seneca who stated, “No person has the power to have everything they want, but it is in their power not to want what they don’t have, and to cheerfully put to good use what they do have” (page 264).

 

When contemplating this quote, I’m reminded of the mixtape The Bar Exam 4 (2017) by lyricist Royce da 5’9” and DJ Green Lantern. On the anthology is a song entitled “Play My Music” in which the lyricist states, “That’s my children saying, ‘That’s my hero, man,’ other children saying, ‘That’s my car that he rollin’ in.”

 

For context, there was an urban pastime in the ‘80s and ‘90s during which children would call out which car they desired as vehicles maneuvered through the neighborhoods of impoverished communities. I recall playing this game of imagination with other boys.

 

As an example, if a shiny red sports car drove by, the first boy to call out “that’s my car” would be credited with fictional ownership of the vehicle. Whichever kid was quick enough to identify what was subjectively considered the best ride then garnered favor among the other children.

 

Regarding “Play My Music”, Royce da 5’9” alludes to Seneca’s lesson. On one hand, the lyricist’s children apparently appreciate what they do have—viewing their dad as a “hero.” On the other hand, kids not of the lyricist’s linage ostensibly want what they don’t have—Royce da 5’9”’s car.

 

Per my interpretation of Seneca’s perspective, Royce da 5’9”’s children couldn’t have everything they wanted, even though their dad is presumably well-off through his hip hop earnings. All the same, his kids seemingly have access to their dad, putting to good use what they do have.

 

Ultimately, there will likely always be a bigger, faster, more expensive car that passes us by on the figurative street of life. We may wish for or dream about having that which we don’t have. Still, it is in your power not to want what you don’t have, and to appreciate what you do possess.

 

If you’re looking for a provider who tries to work to help understand how thinking impacts physical, mental, emotional, and behavioral elements of your life—helping you to sharpen your critical thinking skills, I invite you to reach out today by using the contact widget on my website.

 

As the world’s foremost hip hop-influenced REBT psychotherapist, I’m pleased to try to help people with an assortment of issues from anger (hostility, rage, and aggression) to relational issues, adjustment matters, trauma experience, justice involvement, attention-deficit hyperactivity disorder, anxiety and depression, and other mood or personality-related matters.

 

At Hollings Therapy, LLC, serving all of Texas, I aim to treat clients with dignity and respect while offering a multi-lensed approach to the practice of psychotherapy and life coaching. My mission includes: Prioritizing the cognitive and emotive needs of clients, an overall reduction in client suffering, and supporting sustainable growth for the clients I serve. Rather than simply trying to help you to feel better, I want to try to help you get better!

 

 

Deric Hollings, LPC, LCSW


Photo credit, Designed by Freepik, fair use

 

References:

 

Apple Music. (n.d.). The Bar Exam 4. Retrieved from https://music.apple.com/us/album/the-bar-exam-4/1453118625

Daily Stoic. (n.d.). Translating the Stoics: An interview with “The Daily Stoic” co-author Stephen Hanselman. Retrieved from https://dailystoic.com/stephen-hanselman-interview/

DatPiff. (2017, June 20). Royce Da 5’9 - Play My Music [Video]. YouTube. Retrieved from https://youtu.be/wSwaCn3OSvg?si=THXrFxLn_DhUNsFM

Holiday, R. and Hanselman, S. (2016). The daily stoic: 366 meditations on wisdom, perseverance, and the art of living. Penguin Random House LLC. Retrieved from https://www.pdfdrive.com/the-daily-stoic-366-meditations-on-wisdom-perseverance-and-the-art-of-living-d61378067.html

Hollings, D. (2026, March 3). Blowback and knock-on effects: Subjectivity of beliefs. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/blowback-and-knock-on-effects-subjectivity-of-beliefs

Hollings, D. (2024, October 21). Desire. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/desire

Hollings, D. (2022, March 15). Disclaimer. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/disclaimer

Hollings, D. (2023, September 8). Fair use. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/fair-use

Hollings, D. (2024, May 17). Feeling better vs. getting better. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/feeling-better-vs-getting-better-1

Hollings, D. (2023, October 12). Get better. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/get-better

Hollings, D. (n.d.). Hollings Therapy, LLC [Official website]. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/

Hollings, D. (2024, September 26). Interpreted reality. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/interpreted-reality

Hollings, D. (2023, September 19). Life coaching. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/life-coaching

Hollings, D. (2025, September 19). Power. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/power

Hollings, D. (2024, May 5). Psychotherapist. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/psychotherapist

Hollings, D. (2022, March 24). Rational emotive behavior therapy (REBT). Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/rational-emotive-behavior-therapy-rebt

Hollings, D. (2024, April 21). Stoicism. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/stoicism

Hollings, D. (2025, February 28). To try is my goal. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/to-try-is-my-goal

Hollings, D. (2024, April 17). Wishes, dreams, and goals. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/wishes-dreams-and-goals

Wikipedia. (n.d.). DJ Green Lantern. Retrieved from https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/DJ_Green_Lantern

Wikipedia. (n.d.). Royce da 5’9”. Retrieved from https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Royce_da_5%279%22

Wikipedia. (n.d.). Ryan Holiday. Retrieved from https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ryan_Holiday

Wikipedia. (n.d.). Seneca the Younger. Retrieved from https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Seneca_the_Younger

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