Where I Grew Up
- Deric Hollings
- May 7
- 5 min read
Growing up in Bomb City, I frequently visited Palo Duro Canyon (PDC), the second largest canyon system in the United States. As a child, I used to look for arrowheads and dinosaur fossils when there, yet, I only found tarantulas, scorpions, and rattlesnakes. I still enjoyed it all.
In adolescence, I’d go hiking through the canyon, relish in overnight camping trips, and spend time with youth group and gang-related friends in the state park. Although I’ve been only a couple of times in adulthood, I’ve rarely had anything other than a satisfactory experience there.
Having lived in Austin, Texas for over a decade, I sometimes forget the joy and pleasure I’ve had in connection with PDC memories. Yesterday, a friend of mine from back home (“True”) sent me to following photo that she took on her recent visit to the canyon:
For whatever reason, as one may expect that a country tune would play in one’s head when thinking about PDC, a hip hop song popped into my mind. From his 2019 album James Savage, the track “Where I Grew Up” by rapper Jayo Felony played in my head. The chorus states:
(Where I grew up)
It was nothin’ but the worst fights
Turn around, and it can turn into your worst night
(Where I grew up)
Niggas love to fuccin’ play fight
Until the shit got serious and ended they life
(Where I grew up)
And he keep a side bitch with bad ass kids
(Where I grew up)
Mothafuccas get pacced out
Ain’t no fair fights wit’ the homies, lil’ bitch
Words of the song remind me that when seeing an arguably beautiful photo of the place from which I originate, there’s another dynamic to my memories that’s associated with the area I still consider home. Where I grew up, there were unattractive elements of people’s behavior.
This calls to mind a psychoeducational lesson in Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy (REBT). In particular, I think about the technique of unconditional acceptance that consists of unconditional self-acceptance, unconditional other-acceptance, and unconditional life-acceptance.
For context, one source claims, “Southeast San Diego rapper James Savage, aka Jayo Felony, is a former member of the Rollin 40s Neighborhood, a Crip gang.” Jayo Felony’s alleged former gang set is a rival to the Crip set with which my friends in adolescence were affiliated.
In any case, I appreciate that my mind thought of the rapper’s track when I saw what I consider to be a beautiful sight, because I unconditionally accept myself as a fallible human being who makes mistakes. For instance, I once made the mistake of failing to prepare for a trip to PDC.
The only food and drink items which remained for my Crip friends and me after being in the canyon were barbeque chips and root beer. I got so sick from consuming the highly processed nutrients that to this day I won’t consume either or those items. (They’re now disgusting to me.)
Similarly, I unconditionally accept others as flawed beings who commit errors. As an example, one of the children with whom I spent time in PDC many years ago went on to be arrested for possession of marijuana in adulthood. (Why is recreational use of marijuana is still illegal?)
Additionally, I unconditionally accept that life itself is imperfect. For instance, I once visited PDC when the weather was warm in the morning. By that afternoon, I and the youth group members with whom I went fled the canyon when snow was blowing sideways. (C’est la vie!)
Ultimately, I’m glad that “Where I Grew Up” popped into my head when viewing the photo of PDC. After all, I was provided an opportunity to post yet another poorly written blog entry for the zeros of people (on average) that read my content. (Such is life.)
If you’re looking for a provider who tries to work to help you understand how thinking impacts physical, mental, emotional, and behavioral elements of your life, I invite you to reach out today by using the contact widget on my website.
As the world’s foremost hip hop-influenced REBT psychotherapist, I’m pleased to try to help people with an assortment of issues from anger (hostility, rage, and aggression) to relational issues, adjustment matters, trauma experience, justice involvement, attention-deficit hyperactivity disorder, anxiety and depression, and other mood or personality-related matters.
At Hollings Therapy, LLC, serving all of Texas, I aim to treat clients with dignity and respect while offering a multi-lensed approach to the practice of psychotherapy and life coaching. My mission includes: Prioritizing the cognitive and emotive needs of clients, an overall reduction in client suffering, and supporting sustainable growth for the clients I serve. Rather than simply trying to help you to feel better, I want to try to help you get better!
Deric Hollings, LPC, LCSW
References:
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