Suicide and Suicide Attempts: Jumping Out the Window

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Photo credit, photographer: Brian McElhiney, property of Stars and Stripes, fair use

When serving as military police (MP) while stationed aboard Camp Kinser, a major logistics base for Marine Corps Forces on Okinawa, Japan from 1997 to 1999, I responded to an emergency call at the Kinser towers (on-base military family housing).

The crisis call related to an attempted suicide in-progress. Regarding this matter, the American Psychological Association (APA) states of attempted suicide:

[A] deliberate but unsuccessful attempt to take one’s own life. Research has suggested that older men who are of low socioeconomic status and who are single, divorced, or widowed are at an especially high risk for suicide. Many studies have found an association between childhood physical or sexual abuse and a history of death by suicide as well.

Additional risk factors include hopelessness, heightened impulsivity, problem-solving deficits, perfectionism, a family history of suicide, and certain mental disorders (i.e., depression, bipolar disorder, substance use disorders, psychotic disorders). Although protective factors are studied far less commonly, one of the most consistently identified is a supportive social network or family.

The call to which I responded followed the completed suicide of the service member’s Okinawan spouse within that same year. Regarding suicide, the APA states:

[T]he act of intentionally taking one’s own life. Death by suicide can occur in the context of a major depressive episode, but it may also occur as a result of substance use or other physical or mental disorders.

It can manifest independently of any psychiatric disorder, sometimes without warning signs, particularly as a result of stressful circumstances such as prolonged bereavement, bullying, financial difficulties, or declining health.

I recalled the aftereffects regarding the death of the male Marine’s wife. She’d jumped out the window of their seventh story residence at the Kinser towers. The impact of her body striking the ground left an indention in the dirt and grass, as she apparently died on impact.

A buddy of mine, a fellow MP, attempted cardiopulmonary resuscitation on the decedent’s body, to no avail. For some time thereafter, he was self-disturbed. For context, Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy (REBT) demonstrates a causative relationship that results in this outcome.

REBT uses the ABC model to illustrate that when an undesirable Action occurs and you Believe an unhelpful narrative about the event, it’s your unfavorable assumption, not the occurrence itself, that causes an unpleasant Consequence. This outcome is called self-disturbance.

Noteworthy, from a psychological standpoint, people disturb themselves using a Belief-Consequence (B-C) connection. Of course, this isn’t to suggest that in the context of the naturalistic or physical world there is no Action-Consequence (A-C) connection.

For instance, when my buddy performed chest compressions on the decedent’s torso (Action), his hands reportedly went through her body (Consequence). From an A-C outlook, a body with catastrophic damage due to impact with the ground may not have its ribs intact anymore.

Nevertheless, from a B-C perspective, when the MP was unable to save the decedent (Action) and Believed, “Life is worthless if I can’t save her, and I can’t stand it! It’s terrible, because I must be able to resuscitate everyone,” he was thereafter self-disturbed (Consequence).

Addressing how people upset themselves with unhelpful attitudes, the ABC model incorporates Disputation of unproductive philosophies of life in order to explore Effective new beliefs. Whereas rigid beliefs cause self-disturbance, flexible beliefs result in an un-disturbed condition.

Additionally, REBT uses unconditional acceptance (UA) to relieve self-induced suffering. This is accomplished through use of unconditional self-acceptance (USA), unconditional other-acceptance (UOA), and unconditional life-acceptance (ULA).

Whereas the ABC model is a scientific approach to wellness, UA serves as a philosophical method for un-disturbing yourself. I view the former as an abortive approach to disturbance and the latter as a preventative method. Of course, not all REBT practitioners use the same style as I.

With my approach to REBT, I incorporate author Stephen Covey’s concepts regarding the circles of control, influence, and concern, as well as an area of no concern. UA maps onto the circle of control (USA), circle of influence (UOA), and circle of concern and area of no concern (ULA).

The circle of control encompasses only oneself, the circle of influence encapsulates elements which may be subject to one’s sway, the circle of concern engrosses most matters one can imagine, and the area of no concern relates to all content which isn’t yet imagined.

Irrespective of whether or not my MP buddy would’ve used either the ABC model or UA, he likely wouldn’t have wound up sitting in an almost pitch-black room while holding a book in his hand and staring at it with a vacant look in his eyes once the lights were suddenly turned on.

Alas, he knew nothing about REBT. Nor did the service member who was the subject of the emergent call to which I responded. The latter contacted a neighbor at the towers and requested that an individual look after is two school-aged children moments before I arrived on-scene.

As I stood in front of the large widow at which the man stared, he said to me, “Move out of my way,” to which I immediately replied, “Not on my watch!” Because of the A-C connection, my body obstructing his charge to the window kept the service member from dying that night.

When thinking back all those years, I’m reminded of the song “Jumping (Out the Window)” by rapper Ron Browz, from his album Etherboy (2009). If you’re a fan of auto-tune, which I’m not, then you may enjoy the track. The hook mindlessly states:

I’m jumping out the window with this one

Jumping out the window with this one

Jumping out the window with this one

Jumping out the window

Window…

Window…

I use UA to tolerate and accept that this track exists, and regarding the notion that people actually enjoy it. Nonetheless, it reminds me of the departed Okinawan woman and the following Christmas when her widow attempted to commit suicide. (Unpleasantness all around!)

For you, I offer a psychoeducational lesson on how to un-disturb yourself. Staring at that window may be tempting at times. Still, you don’t have to actually charge toward it. “Jumping out the window” is a choice, and you can choose otherwise. The choice is yours.

If you’re looking for a provider who tries to work to help you understand how thinking impacts physical, mental, emotional, and behavioral elements of your life, I invite you to reach out today by using the contact widget on my website.

As the world’s foremost hip hop-influenced REBT psychotherapist, I’m pleased to try to help people with an assortment of issues from anger (hostility, rage, and aggression) to relational issues, adjustment matters, trauma experience, justice involvement, attention-deficit hyperactivity disorder, anxiety and depression, and other mood or personality-related matters.

At Hollings Therapy, LLC, serving all of Texas, I aim to treat clients with dignity and respect while offering a multi-lensed approach to the practice of psychotherapy and life coaching. My mission includes: Prioritizing the cognitive and emotive needs of clients, an overall reduction in client suffering, and supporting sustainable growth for the clients I serve. Rather than simply trying to help you to feel better, I want to try to help you get better!

Deric Hollings, LPC, LCSW

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