What Type of Monster Does That?

[DISCLAIMER]

Photo credit, fair use

Imagine visiting someone’s home and needing to relieve yourself in the bathroom. It’s not number one, but number two. Your host points the way toward the facilities and off you go.

Paying little attention to your surroundings, once seated on the toilet, you handle your business. Then, you discover something almost unspeakable. Your host has placed the toilet paper roll on upside down (feeding the stream of thin, absorbent paper product counterclockwise).

“What type of monster does that?” you think, “Everyone knows that the toilet paper roll is supposed to go over and not under!” Aside from the shitting that occurred in the bathroom, you’ve begun shoulding on your host and poorly evaluating this person. Allow me to explain.

Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy (REBT) uses the ABC model to illustrate that when an undesirable Action occurs and you Believe an unhelpful narrative about the event, it’s your unfavorable assumption and not the occurrence itself that causes an unpleasant Consequence.

For example, your host placed a toilet paper roll on upside down (Action) and you used irrational Beliefs relating to a global evaluation and demandingness thusly, “What type of monster does that? Everyone knows that the toilet paper roll is supposed to go over and not under!”

A global evaluation occurs when your rigid requirements aren’t met, as you, other people, and/or life are rated as totally undesirable, bad, or unworthy. In the example used herein, you’ve appraised your host as having such little worth that the person is comparable to a monster.

Demandingness is conceptualized by inflexible expectations of oneself, others, and/or life which include inferences, evaluations, and/or beliefs which manifest with words such as “should,” “must,” or “ought” (and derivatives thereunto). This includes terms such as “supposed to.”

While you and I may agree it’s objectively true that a toilet paper roll is supposed to go in the direction of over (not under) itself (/s), other people may disagree with our worldview. Also, when others disagree with our perspective, this doesn’t render them as worthless as monsters.

Given this relatively brief psychoeducational lesson on self-disturbance which is addressed by the ABC model, perhaps you can stop shoulding on and negatively appraising other people. Besides, what type of monster does that!? (/s).

If you’re looking for a provider who tries to work to help understand how thinking impacts physical, mental, emotional, and behavioral elements of your life—helping you to sharpen your critical thinking skills, I invite you to reach out today by using the contact widget on my website.

As a psychotherapist, I’m pleased to try to help people with an assortment of issues ranging from anger (hostility, rage, and aggression) to relational issues, adjustment matters, trauma experience, justice involvement, attention-deficit hyperactivity disorder, anxiety and depression, and other mood or personality-related matters.

At Hollings Therapy, LLC, serving all of Texas, I aim to treat clients with dignity and respect while offering a multi-lensed approach to the practice of psychotherapy and life coaching. My mission includes: Prioritizing the cognitive and emotive needs of clients, an overall reduction in client suffering, and supporting sustainable growth for the clients I serve. Rather than simply trying to help you to feel better, I want to try to help you get better!

Deric Hollings, LPC, LCSW

References:

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