Do What You Have to Do

[DISCLAIMER]

In 1996, the classic rap group from Queens, New York, Lost Boyz (“LB”), released Legal Drug Money which one of my favorite old school albums from the golden age of hip hop. It was one of those anthologies which weren’t heavily polluted by useless filler (lower quality songs).

On the album was the track “Jeeps, Lex Coups, Bimaz & Benz”, produced by Easy Mo Bee, which was released as a single in 1995, and on which Mr. Cheeks stated:

Keep the shit live for the year ‘95!

I got more niggas in my tribe than there’s bees in the bee hive

LB Fam — every day, stay high

Mr. Cheeks — every day I

Concentrate to get my shit straight

Make us wait before it’s too fuckin’ late!

The Lost Boyz — yeah, that’s who I be’s wit’!

That’s who I runs wit’, who I smoke trees wit’!

Pack your bags, head outta town

I’ll be back around, so be gone before sundown

From Jamaica comes a nigga named Cheeks

With techniques for the streets over ruffneck beats!

There’s rumors goin’ around about the Cheeks can’t remain raw

I’m the motherfucker choppin’ crews like a chainsaw

Talk what you wanna, do what you gotta!

Well, let me tell you somethin’, man — you can’t do me nada!

Common of the braggadocio permeating rap of the 90s, Mr. Cheeks described his endeavors. Still, what stands out to me is how he addressed his perspective on gossip. Apparently unbothered by one who talks “what you wanna,” the lyricist invited such behavior.

In fact, he outright encouraged gossip about him when saying “do what you gotta!” When expressing “you can’t do me nada,” Mr. Cheeks presumably meant that whoever spoke ill of him couldn’t affect the lyricist one way or another. This is arguably a healthy worldview.

Similarly, on Situation: Critical (1998), early electronic dance music (EDM) artist Ultra Naté featured the song “Free” which was released as a single in 1997. On the chorus, she twice states:

‘Cause you’re free

To do what you want to do

You’ve got to live your life

Do what you want to do

Per my interpretation of Ultra Naté’s lyrics, the EDM singer invites one to accept that people are self-determined and autonomous individuals (i.e., “free”) who have agency (i.e., the ability to “do what you want to do”). This is akin to Mr. Cheeks’s pronouncement in two ways.

First, Ultra Naté welcomes individuals to do as they will, as she doesn’t unhelpfully demand that they must do as she desires. Second, the vocalist doesn’t indicate that another person’s choices will necessarily impact her. This outlook aligns with the psychotherapeutic modality I practice.

As Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy (REBT) is informed by Stoic philosophy, this blog entry is part of an ongoing series regarding a book entitled The Daily Stoic: 366 Meditations on Wisdom, Perseverance, and the Art of Living by Ryan Holiday and Stephen Hanselman.

The authors quote Epictetus who stated, “First tell yourself what kind of person you want to be, then do what you have to do. For in nearly every pursuit we see this to be the case. Those in athletic pursuit first choose the sport they want, and then do that work” (page 142).

The ancient Stoic philosopher’s invitation to “do what you have to do” represents a helpful recommendatory should statement. It’s as though he advocated that one recommendatorily should act as if one is capable of accomplishing a pursuit, and then to work toward that goal.

I use this useful technique when working with clients while providing REBT services. Regarding this approach to rational living, authors of The Daily Stoic state (page 142):

An archer is highly unlikely to hit a target she did not aim for. The same goes for you, whatever your target. You are certain to miss the target if you don’t bother to draw back and fire. Our perceptions and principles guide us in the selection of what we want—but ultimately our actions determine whether we get there or not.

Photo credit, fair use

Imagine being that archer who never bothers to draw back and fire. You want to strike your target, though you never take action. In that case, are you even considered an archer? The same principle applies elsewhere in life.

In consideration of the perceived perspectives of Mr. Cheeks and Ultra Naté, imagine that they wanted to achieve success with their interests and goals. However, their metric for achievement was based on the perceptions of others. “You’re nothing, and never will be,” the crowd declares.

How likely would the music artists be to hit their proverbial targets when outsourcing their self-worth to the masses? The same principle applies to you. Therefore, I encourage you to do what you have to do to achieve success with your interests and goals, within reason.

Of course, I’m not advocating criminal activity, dishonesty, or other actions aligned with foul play. Rather, reasonably, you can allow the opinions of others to metaphorically roll away like water off a duck’s back. About this approach, authors of The Daily Stoic conclude (page 142):

So yes, spend some time—real, uninterrupted time—thinking about what’s important to you, what your priorities are. Then, work toward that and forsake all the others. It’s not enough to wish and hope. One must act—and act right.

Do what you have to do, within reason. Meanwhile, others can talk what they wanna, do what they gotta, but let me tell you somethin’, they can’t do you nada! This is ‘cause you’re free to do what you want to do. You’ve got to live your life – not anyone else’s.

If you’re looking for a provider who tries to work to help understand how thinking impacts physical, mental, emotional, and behavioral elements of your life—helping you to sharpen your critical thinking skills, I invite you to reach out today by using the contact widget on my website.

As the world’s foremost hip hop and EDM-influenced REBT psychotherapist, I’m pleased to try to help people with an assortment of issues from anger (hostility, rage, and aggression) to relational issues, adjustment matters, trauma experience, justice involvement, attention-deficit hyperactivity disorder, anxiety and depression, and other mood or personality-related matters.

At Hollings Therapy, LLC, serving all of Texas, I aim to treat clients with dignity and respect while offering a multi-lensed approach to the practice of psychotherapy and life coaching. My mission includes: Prioritizing the cognitive and emotive needs of clients, an overall reduction in client suffering, and supporting sustainable growth for the clients I serve. Rather than simply trying to help you to feel better, I want to try to help you get better!

Deric Hollings, LPC, LCSW

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