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Is There No Standard Anymore?

  • Writer: Deric Hollings
    Deric Hollings
  • 11 minutes ago
  • 7 min read

 

When serving in Okinawa, Japan (1997-1999), a fellow member of the United States Marine Corps military police invited me to listen to a song on his MiniDisc player. “How are you from Texas and don’t know about this band?” he asked while handing me his headphones.

 

My ears were then battered when listening to the song “Walk” by Texas-based heavy metal band Pantera, from their album Vulgar Display of Power (1992). In part, the lyrics state:

 

[Verse 1]

Can’t you see I’m easily bothered by persistence?

One step from lashing out at you

You want in to get under my skin and call yourself a friend

I’ve got more friends like you, what do I do?

 

[Pre-Chorus]

Is there no standard anymore?

What it takes, who I am

Where I’ve been, belong

You can’t be something you’re not

Be yourself by yourself

Stay away from me

A lesson learned in life

Known from the dawn of time

 

[Chorus]

Respect

Walk

What did you say?

Respect

Walk

Are you talkin’ to me?

Are you talkin’ to me?

 

According to one source, “Vocalist Phil Anselmo said that the message of the song was ‘Take your fucking attitude and take a fuckin’ walk with that. Keep that shit away from me’.” I now view this message through the proverbial lens of Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy (REBT).

 

REBT uses the ABC model to illustrate that when an undesirable Action occurs and you Believe an unhelpful narrative about the event, it’s your unfavorable assumption, not the occurrence itself, that causes an unpleasant Consequence. This is known as distress or disturbance.

 

In particular, there are four predominate irrational beliefs which people often use to upset themselves: global evaluations, low frustration tolerance, awfulizing, and demandingness. When contemplating these unproductive beliefs, think of the acronym GLAD.

 

Additionally, from a psychological standpoint, people distress or disturb themselves using a Belief-Consequence (B-C) connection. Of course, this isn’t to suggest that in the context of the naturalistic or physical world there is no Action-Consequence (A-C) connection.

 

From an A-C outlook, one source reports that “Phil was pronounced dead for 4-5 minutes after going into cardiac arrest due to heroin overdose after the band’s show in Dallas, TX back in ‘96.” Use of heroin that gets under one’s skin (Action) may cause cardiac arrest (Consequence).

 

From a B-C view, someone persistently says something to Anselmo (Action) and he Believes, “You’re worthless [G], and I can’t stand you being under my skin [L]! It’s awful that you call yourself a friend [A], because there must be standards which prevent the way you act [D]!”

 

For context, standards are levels of quality, achievement, performance, etc., which are considered acceptable or desirable. With his GLAD script regarding violated standards, Anselmo then causes his own anger, as he’s “one step from lashing out” at a friend (Consequence).

 

Addressing how people upset themselves with unhelpful attitudes, the ABC model incorporates Disputation of unproductive philosophies of life in order to explore Effective new beliefs. Whereas rigid beliefs cause self-disturbance, flexible beliefs result in an un-disturbed condition.

 

Years since first having heard Pantera, the line “is there no standard anymore” popped into my mind today. For context, one source reports, “Mueller, who [died,] oversaw the probe into the Trump 2016 campaign’s ties to Russia, was 81. Trump responded: ‘Good, I’m glad he’s dead.”

 

I can understand how Trump may be glad that Mueller has now passed, and how some people believe it’s acceptable to celebrate the death of their perceived detractors. As fallible human beings, people often express satisfaction at the passing of personally-unappreciated individuals.

 

Being that I take a principled stance on free speech, I fully advocate the right of Trump to cheer Mueller’s death. This is a standard that I apply to all people, not only Trump. Now, I ask, does Trump apply a similar standard to other people? Apparently not! According to one source:

 

President Donald Trump made a jaw-dropping quip about “hate speech” and slain activist Charlie Kirk during a new Fox News interview.

 

The aftermath of the stunning Kirk killing has prompted what many see as an assault on free speech. Trump Attorney General Pam Bondi has drawn criticism for threatening to go after people over “hate speech” — including mockery or celebration of Kirk’s assassination.

 

It appears as though members of the Trump administration, to include Donald Trump, have standards (elements established by authority, custom, or general consent as a model or example) regarding their own behavior, though a separate set of standards for the actions of others.

 

Without self-distressing or self-disturbing with unaccommodating beliefs about these apparent hypocritical standards, I’ll dismissively say, as Anselmo said, “Take your fucking attitude and take a fuckin’ walk with that. Keep that shit away from me!” Respect! Walk!

 

If you’re looking for a provider who tries to work to help understand how thinking impacts physical, mental, emotional, and behavioral elements of your life—helping you to sharpen your critical thinking skills, I invite you to reach out today by using the contact widget on my website.

 

As a psychotherapist, I’m pleased to try to help people with an assortment of issues ranging from anger (hostility, rage, and aggression) to relational issues, adjustment matters, trauma experience, justice involvement, attention-deficit hyperactivity disorder, anxiety and depression, and other mood or personality-related matters.

 

At Hollings Therapy, LLC, serving all of Texas, I aim to treat clients with dignity and respect while offering a multi-lensed approach to the practice of psychotherapy and life coaching. My mission includes: Prioritizing the cognitive and emotive needs of clients, an overall reduction in client suffering, and supporting sustainable growth for the clients I serve. Rather than simply trying to help you to feel better, I want to try to help you get better!

 

 

Deric Hollings, LPC, LCSW


Photo credit (edited), Designed by Freepik, fair use

 

References:

 

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