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Qué Será, Será: Whatever Will Be, Will Be
[DISCLAIMER] Photo credit (edited), property of Philips, fair use Within my blog, I often reference my late mother. Despite her flaws, of which there were many – though perhaps no more so than my own, she wasn’t a good or bad person. She was merely a fallible human being, as am I. Therefore, any interpretation I have of her behavior is subjective. One act which was personally favorable regards how my mom used to sing when cleaning our home, holding me close, or whenever h

Deric Hollings
Jul 219 min read


This Man Should Be in Hell, He’s Horrible
[DISCLAIMER] When providing psychoeducational lessons on Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy (REBT), I teach people about the ABC model of self-disturbance (how people upset themselves through use of irrational beliefs). Now, I’ll address a finer point of this psychotherapeutic model of wellness. For context, REBT uses the ABC model to illustrate how when an undesirable Action occurs and you Believe an unhelpful narrative about the event, it’s your unfavorable assumption, n

Deric Hollings
Jul 139 min read


Self-Distress and Distress Tolerance
[DISCLAIMER] Photo credit, fair use Early in my graduate studies regarding professional care for mental, emotional, and behavioral health (collectively “mental health”), I chose to practice Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy (REBT), a psychotherapeutic modality developed by the late psychologist Albert Ellis. REBT uses the ABC model to illustrate that when an undesirable Action occurs and you Believe an unhelpful narrative about the event, it’s your unfavorable assumption,

Deric Hollings
Jul 711 min read


Spilled Milk: Tolerance and Acceptance
[DISCLAIMER] I invite you to consider that one source states, “We’ve all heard the phase before – ‘Don’t cry over spilled milk.’ It’s a classic saying meant to remind us that getting upset over things we can’t change won’t do any good,” using milk as a symbol of something valuable, yet easily lost. Sometimes expressed as “there’s no use crying over spilled milk,” the meaning of this idiomatic expression infers that there’s no point in being upset over something that has a

Deric Hollings
Jun 1817 min read


It Is What It Is
[DISCLAIMER] “Son,” my dad told me when I was a child, “I don’t know why I brought children into this world when it’s so wicked [morally very bad; evil],” per 1 John 5:19. He went on to explain that anyone with knowledge of the Bible would do well to reconsider the desire to have kids. This was a revelation to me, as my dad had four children! Furthermore, his admission was contrary to what my late stepmom told me when saying it was an “abomination” not to abide by the bib

Deric Hollings
May 299 min read


I Can't Make It Out Alone
[DISCLAIMER] When providing psychoeducational lessons on Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy (REBT), I teach people about the ABC model of self-disturbance (how people upset themselves through use of irrational beliefs). Now, I’ll address a finer point of this psychotherapeutic model of wellness. For context, REBT uses the ABC model to illustrate how when an undesirable Action occurs and you Believe an unhelpful narrative about the event, it’s your unfavorable assumption, n

Deric Hollings
May 117 min read


Discomfort Anxiety: Where Are You Going?
[DISCLAIMER] In high school, after years of tolerating distorted vision, a family that invited me to live with them from the children’s home in which I was a resident took me to an optometrist. It turned out that I needed prescription eyewear. If memory serves, once I received my new glasses, I was excited about being able to see details of the leaves on a tree from a window of the optometry clinic. “See that?” the optometrist said, “That’s what you’ve been missing!” On

Deric Hollings
May 1011 min read


The Devil Wears Prada 2: Maybe We Should Just Be Not Perfect Together
[DISCLAIMER] *The Devil Wears Prada 2 (2026) spoilers contained herein. Photo credit, property of 20th Century Studios, fair use I never read the novel The Devil Wears Prada (2003)—about a young woman hired as a personal assistant to a powerful fashion magazine editor, a job that becomes challenging as she experiences difficulty trying to keep up with her boss’s schedule and disobliging expectations. All the same, I watched the comedy-drama film The Devil Wears Prada (2

Deric Hollings
May 411 min read


It's Just Easy Come and Easy Go: Tolerance and Acceptance
[ DISCLAIMER ] When living in a children’s home during high school, a family with whom I attended Churches of Christ services asked me to live with them. They had a daughter, who was in the same grade as I and to whom I’ll refer as “Antebellum,” who at one point drove a red Chevrolet Corsica . Whether or not Antebellum knew I was in love with her for many years remains unknown, as we fell out of contact a couple decades ago. Nevertheless, she was my first love (the firs

Deric Hollings
Mar 148 min read


Better Let It Go
[ DISCLAIMER ] In 2006, hip hop duo Little Brother (lyricists Phonte and Big Pooh ) released Separate but Equal which contained the track “ Let It Go ”, produced by 9th Wonder , that featured lyricist Yasiin Bey and a sample of “ Got to Get Along ” (1976) by Jamaican reggae fusion band Third World . Notably, the hook states, “ Let it go . Ah, ah, let it go. Better let it go. Ah, just let it go. Pull it back, let it go. Ah, and let it flow, like… (All my hopes were

Deric Hollings
Mar 612 min read


Cold Feet: Can You Stand Them?
[ DISCLAIMER ] Photo credit , fair use Years ago, I spoke with client X whose wife had recently departed. He reminded me of an important lesson about the distinction between low frustration tolerance (LFT) and high frustration tolerance (HFT)— Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy (REBT) concepts. I now share his example with you. In common parlance, tolerance is defined as the capacity to endure pain or hardship. Additionally, according to the American Psychological Asso

Deric Hollings
Feb 108 min read


We Must Seize What Flees
[ DISCLAIMER ] There’s a line on lyricist Murs ’s song “ Woke Up Dead ”, produced by Jesse Shatkin and from the album Have a Nice Life (2015), that states “gettin’ older as my life gets shorter.” It’s the sort of message that at first may seem like a throwaway line. Of course, we get older as our lives get shorter. Still, I wonder about how often (or not) people contemplate their own mortality. With each passing day, they grow older while their lives get shorter. All th

Deric Hollings
Nov 1, 20256 min read


My Lil' Ol' Tie
[ DISCLAIMER ] My late stepmom used demeaning remarks when mocking people in her uniquely comical way. For context, “demeaning” is...

Deric Hollings
Sep 30, 20255 min read


Is This the Tool You Want to Use?
[ DISCLAIMER ] Photo credit , property of Crunchyroll, fair use Not long after it first aired as an English dub version, I enjoyed the...

Deric Hollings
Sep 18, 20256 min read


Agree to Disagree
[ DISCLAIMER ] Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy (REBT) uses the ABC model to illustrate that when an undesirable A ction occurs and...

Deric Hollings
May 25, 20256 min read


I Can't Take It: It's More Than I Can Handle
[DISCLAIMER] Have you ever been exposed to a CS gas chamber? I have. In a blogpost entitled Resilience, I described my experience from...

Deric Hollings
May 19, 20256 min read


Life-Downing
[ DISCLAIMER ] The current blog entry is intended to serve as a threequel to recent blogposts entitled Self-Downing and Other-Downing...

Deric Hollings
Jan 8, 202510 min read


Insufferable vs. Undesirable
[DISCLAIMER] Having attended Valleyview Junior High School in my youth, I witnessed a homecoming football custom for which students...

Deric Hollings
Feb 14, 20246 min read


Resignation
[DISCLAIMER] Page seven of The REBT Therapist’s Pocket Companion invites Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy (REBT) practitioners to help...

Deric Hollings
Jan 3, 20245 min read


Accept Yourself
[DISCLAIMER] Earlier this morning, when practicing self-improvement through physical training, I heard a line from rapper ANoyd’s song...

Deric Hollings
Jul 28, 20234 min read
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