Eighty Years Here, We Live and We Die, It's Like a Blink of an Eye

[DISCLAIMER]

When they were assembled, before apparently going on to pursue solo careers, the group Tragic Allies reminded me of golden age hip hop. Therefore, I still appreciate the album 14 Forms: The Book of Estee Nack (2015) by former group members lyricist Estee Nack and producer Purpose.

As a side note, Estee Nack has more self-ascribed nicknames than any other rapper or lyricist of which I can think. A personal favorite is “Nacknuggets.” In any event, on the aforementioned anthology is a track entitled “T.I.M.E.” in which Nacknuggets states:

Aye, yo, my father always used to talk to me about time

How many trillions of years since the universe was created

Solar System divides the Sun, Moon, and stars shine

Across the sky, light from the Earth, the stars align

I never paid it much mind. Why? Maybe ‘cause I was blind

But in this day and time, I heed the signs

Millennium is a thought

Eighty years here, we live and die, it’s like a blink of an eye

Compare the flesh to the u-n-i-verse, this shit is deep

It takes twenty-four hours for the clock to repeat

Now, eight of them hours, you gon’ use to sleep

Eight hours more, workin’ a nine-to-five, ‘cause you gotta eat

That means eight hours a day times three hundred and sixty-five

That’s two thousand, nine hundred-twenty hours a year

Two hundred, thirty-three thousand, six hundred hours a lifetime

That’s if you’re lucky, ‘cause there’s poison up in this country

What type of mark is left to show and prove the value of every breath?

The product of your every step, fine, just let it intertwine

And sink in, these just thoughts from my mind when I’m thinkin’ ‘bout time

The lyricist alluded to a belief that’s rational (in accordance with both logic and reason) when examining the amount of time fallible humans may predictably experience in life. His conclusion now spawns a psychoeducational lesson on Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy (REBT).

According to the United States Centers for Disease Control and Prevention—the same entity that botched the COVID-19 response, data suggests that life expectancy at birth for both sexes is 79.0 years; 76.5 years for males and 81.4 years for females. This is a prediction, not a guarantee.

REBT uses unconditional acceptance (UA) to relieve self-induced suffering for shorter than expected rates of living. This is accomplished through use of unconditional self-acceptance (USA), unconditional other-acceptance (UOA), and unconditional life-acceptance (ULA).

With my approach to REBT, I incorporate author Stephen Covey’s concepts regarding the circles of control, influence, and concern, as well as an area of no concern. UA maps onto the circle of control (USA), circle of influence (UOA), and circle of concern and area of no concern (ULA).

The circle of control encompasses only oneself, the circle of influence encapsulates elements which may be subject to one’s sway, the circle of concern engrosses most matters one can imagine, and the area of no concern relates to all content which isn’t yet imagined.

Regarding my circle of control and USA, I acknowledge that I control only my reaction to the fact that males tend to have shorter life expectancy rates than females. However, I don’t rigidly control my own life expectancy outcome, as I likely won’t live forever in human form.

Concerning my circle of influence and UOA, I recognize that I may be able to influence other people to acknowledge that they also control only their reactions to an inevitable end to the life cycle. Yet, they don’t necessarily have to pay any attention to what I say in this regard.

Pertaining to my circle of concern and ULA, I admit that life is impermanent and uncertain, as every living being will inescapably die. Although I genuinely hope that you’ll outlive me, I’m also aware that I may regrettably live longer than you. (One truly hopes this won’t be the case.)

As for the area of no concern, it’s not even worth discussing. After all, as stated by Nacknuggets, “eighty years here, we live and die, it’s like a blink of an eye,” so why waste what relatively little time is left in this fleeting existence discussing nonsense regarding hypothetical outcomes?

Recently, when talking about this topic with client X—who’s been practicing REBT, and doing so with flatteringly significant outcomes—I used gallows humor when discussing my unavoidable death. “I hope not to be here when AI [artificial intelligence] takes over,” I said.

Client X gasped and replied, “But that may be within the next decade!” Without missing a beat, I responded, “Oh, I know. I’m ready!” Client X looked puzzled. I then replied, “I’ve had a good run!” Alas, the discussion afforded client X an opportunity to further practice UA.

Now, I invite you to do as client X does—practice acceptance, without unhelpful conditions, regarding that fact that everyone you’ve ever known, currently know (to include your psychotherapist), and ever will know is going to die. This could happen in a “blink of an eye.”

If you’re looking for a provider who tries to work to help understand how thinking impacts physical, mental, emotional, and behavioral elements of your life—helping you to sharpen your critical thinking skills, I invite you to reach out today by using the contact widget on my website.

As the world’s foremost hip hop-influenced REBT psychotherapist, I’m pleased to try to help people with an assortment of issues from anger (hostility, rage, and aggression) to relational issues, adjustment matters, trauma experience, justice involvement, attention-deficit hyperactivity disorder, anxiety and depression, and other mood or personality-related matters.

At Hollings Therapy, LLC, serving all of Texas, I aim to treat clients with dignity and respect while offering a multi-lensed approach to the practice of psychotherapy and life coaching. My mission includes: Prioritizing the cognitive and emotive needs of clients, an overall reduction in client suffering, and supporting sustainable growth for the clients I serve. Rather than simply trying to help you to feel better, I want to try to help you get better!

Deric Hollings, LPC, LCSW

Photo credit, fair use

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