Expletives: I Just Do Shit Differently Than Motherfuckers Do

[DISCLAIMER]

When practicing Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy (REBT), I often use irreverent communication (a style of interaction that deliberately disregards normativity standards or expected politeness, incorporating humor, sarcasm, frankness, and atypical observations).

This includes expletives (exclamatory words or phrases, especially those which are obscene or profane), also referred to as cusswords, profanity, swear words, and obscenities. For example, the term “motherfucker” regards a person who is formidable, contemptible, or offensive.

Usually used as a generalized term of abuse, motherfucker can also serve as an expression of endearment (e.g., I appreciate those motherfuckers who’ve made it this far in the blogpost), or as a substitute word for a person or people (e.g., I suspect most motherfuckers won’t read this).

Similarly, in common parlance, the term “shit” regards bodily waste discharged through the anus. Still, shit also relates to trivial and usually boastful or inaccurate talk (e.g., I’m talking shit), or a worthless, offensive, or detestable person or thing (e.g., this post is shit), and so forth.

Perhaps somewhat confusingly, shit also concerns someone or something that is excellent and exemplary (e.g., I’m the shit), as well as vaguely alluding to a person, place, or thing (e.g., I do shit differently). Thus, when using expletives with REBT, I maintain that context matters.

For instance, consider the album Return to the Golden Era (2013) by lyricist Awon and producer Phoniks. It contained a song “Forever Ill” that featured lyricists Dephlow and Tiff the Gift (“Tiff”). Ending her verse, the latter states, “I just do shit differently than motherfuckers do.”

Noteworthy, one meaning of the term “just” is having a basis in or conforming to fact or reason (e.g., I have just reason to write this blogpost). Likewise, just may serve as a synonym for the terms perhaps, possibly, quite, very, only, or simply (e.g., you just might learn something).

When providing psychoeducational lessons on REBT, I invite people to consider that use of the term just may regard justification (the act or an instance of justifying—proving or showing to be just, right, or reasonable), as in, “I just do shit differently than motherfuckers do.”

As an example, if one were to ask Tiff why she doesn’t typically rap about the nonsense espoused by many female rappers, such as K Wet (also referred to as K.Wettt), by using her sexuality in place of relevant lyricism, I imagine that Tiff would justify her own actions.

Using expletives on “Forever Ill”, she clearly used justification by stating, “I just do shit differently than motherfuckers do.” I appreciate this perspective. Therefore, using a hypothetical scenario, I suspect that Tiff employs elements related to one of the main tools used in REBT.

Specifically, REBT utilizes unconditional acceptance (UA) to relieve self-induced suffering. This is accomplished through use of unconditional self-acceptance (USA), unconditional other-acceptance (UOA), and unconditional life-acceptance (ULA).

With my approach to REBT, I incorporate author Stephen Covey’s concepts regarding the circles of control, influence, and concern, as well as an area of no concern. UA maps onto the circle of control (USA), circle of influence (UOA), and circle of concern and area of no concern (ULA).

The circle of control encompasses only oneself, the circle of influence encapsulates elements which may be subject to one’s sway, the circle of concern engrosses most matters one can imagine, and the area of no concern relates to all content which isn’t yet imagined.

Regarding Tiff’s circle of control and USA, she likely realizes that even though female rappers who use sexuality in place of relevant lyricism may receive more attention and money, Tiff can control only how she reacts to the system of hip hop that favors nonsense over quality lyrics.

Concerning Tiff’s circle of influence and UOA, she possibly recognizes that rappers such as K Wet may not be able to be influenced by lyricists who promote thoughtful lyrical content, as the allure of fame and fortune is important to some people, so Tiff can use her influence elsewhere.

Pertaining to Tiff’s circle of concern and ULA, she perhaps grasps that in this impermanent and uncertain life, which will inevitably place both lyricists and rappers in similar outcomes, Tiff may focus on that which she can control and influence, instead of focusing on hyper-sexuality.

As for the area of no concern, an imaginary realm in which thicc-ass female emcees aren’t favored over women with extraordinary talent on the microphone, Tiff likely comprehends that this dimension is nothing like that imagined one, so there’s no use in fantasizing about it.

Ultimately, Tiff just does shit differently than motherfuckers do, and I’m glad that she does! Now, I invite you to fucking do the same! Oh, and if you don’t appreciate use of expletives, then that’s okay. You can practice UA in this regard, motherfucka!

If you’re looking for a provider who tries to work to help understand how thinking impacts physical, mental, emotional, and behavioral elements of your life—helping you to sharpen your critical thinking skills, I invite you to reach out today by using the contact widget on my website.

As the world’s foremost hip hop-influenced REBT psychotherapist, I’m pleased to try to help people with an assortment of issues from anger (hostility, rage, and aggression) to relational issues, adjustment matters, trauma experience, justice involvement, attention-deficit hyperactivity disorder, anxiety and depression, and other mood or personality-related matters.

At Hollings Therapy, LLC, serving all of Texas, I aim to treat clients with dignity and respect while offering a multi-lensed approach to the practice of psychotherapy and life coaching. My mission includes: Prioritizing the cognitive and emotive needs of clients, an overall reduction in client suffering, and supporting sustainable growth for the clients I serve. Rather than simply trying to help you to feel better, I want to try to help you get better!

Deric Hollings, LPC, LCSW

Photo credit, fair use

References:

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