The Day After: Death Is the Radical Equalizer, as We All End Up the Same Way

[DISCLAIMER]

Not long after having graduated from Amarillo High School, Atlanta, Georgia hip hop group the Goodie Mob (comprised of lyricists Big Gipp, Khujo, CeeLo Green, and T-Mo)—members of the Atlanta music collective Dungeon Family—released their debut album Soul Food (1995).

The anthology was released not long after Dungeon Family duo Outkast (comprised of lyricists Big Boi and André 3000) won an award for New Group of the Year at the 1995 Source Awards. For those who don’t know, don’t care, forgot, or otherwise, that was a pivotal moment for rap.

Per one source, “The negative reaction from the crowd was immediate, sharp, and continuous booing.” Nevertheless, with Goodie Mob standing behind him, one of my top-five-dead-or-alive lyricists, André 3000, took to the stage and boldly declared:

But it’s like this, though. I’m tired of folks, know’msayin’, closedminded folks, know’msayin’. It’s like, we got a demo tape, and don’t nobody wanna hear it. But it’s like ‘dis, the South got somethin’ to say! Thas’ all I got to say!

I’d never been more proud of southern hip hop than at that precise moment! Thereafter, I eagerly anticipated the purchase of Soul Food. Once I bought it, my friend “1/2 Ton”, and I cruised throughout Bomb City, blaring tracks from the album, as the South indeed had something to say!

One song that provided content for thoughtful listening and discussion between 1/2 Ton and I was “The Day After”, featuring vocals by Roni Griffin, which was a track about the inevitability of death. Lyrics of the chorus state:

I’m so happy we made it

I knew one day we would

All these years of strugglin’

Were never understood

Now, my eyes are open, and I can clearly see

We didn’t die for nothin’, ‘cause we’re finally free

I’m so happy

Rather than a song of lamentation regarding the inescapability of death and all that one supposedly loses when life unavoidably ends, “The Day After” is a celebratory track from the perspective of the day after one’s passing. In essence, it’s about freedom from life in this form.

Resonating most with me, as I subscribed to Christian beliefs at the time, was CeeLo’s statement, “I know of a place not too far away that maybe you and I can both go someday. But I gotta make sure, ‘cause I ain’t tryin’ to stay here! Don’t y’all realize that the end is so near?”

Till this day, “I ain’t tryin’ to stay here,” irrespective of the fact that I remain religiously agnostic. Therefore, until my ride shows up (i.e., death), I’m learning how to die, so that I may lead an abundant life with what little time I have left. In this way, a book now comes to mind.

As Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy (REBT) is informed by Stoic philosophy, this blog entry is part of an ongoing series regarding a book entitled The Daily Stoic: 366 Meditations on Wisdom, Perseverance, and the Art of Living by Ryan Holiday and Stephen Hanselman.

The authors quote ancient Stoic and Roman Emperor Marcus Aurelius, who stated, “Both Alexander the Great and his mule-keeper were both brought to the same place by death—they were either received into the all-generative reason, or scattered among the atoms” (page 380).

I have no way of knowing what will occur the day after I die. Perhaps, and preferably, it will be nothingness and without a different iteration of life. Being “scattered among the atoms” would be ideal for me. No matter what, I’m going to die! About this, the authors state (page 380):

In a world that is in many ways becoming more and more unequal, there aren’t many truly equalitarian experiences left. When Benjamin Franklin observed that “in this world nothing can be said to be certain, except death and taxes,” he couldn’t have known how good some people would get at avoiding their taxes. But death? That’s still the one thing that everyone experiences.

I appreciate that authors of The Daily Stoic spoke truth about reality in the cited text. Not only are all fallible human beings not equal, not everyone abides by established rules. This is merely a matter of truth, as is the fact that you’ll one day die! Now, the authors continue (page 380):

We all face the same end. Whether you conquer the known world or shine the shoes of the people who do, at the end death will be a radical equalizer—a lesson in abject humility.  Shakespeare had Hamlet trace out the logic in stark terms for both Alexander and Julius Caesar:

“Imperious Caesar, dead and turn’d to clay,

Might stop a hole to keep the wind away:

O, that that earth, which kept the world in awe,

Should patch a wall to expel the winter flaw!”

As we cruised around Bomb City, listening to “The Day After”, 1/2 Ton and I discussed our unpreventable deaths. Even at our relatively young ages, we comprehended that death was a radical equalizer for all living beings.

For context, death is merely a permanent cessation of all vital functions, radical means very different from the usual or traditional, and an equalizer is a source that ties the game or balances the score. Of this matter, authors of The Daily Stoic conclude (page 380):

The next time you feel yourself getting high and mighty—or conversely, feeling low and inferior—just remember, we all end up the same way. In death, no one is better, no one is worse. All our stories have the same finale.

What do you imagine will occur the day after you die? Do you even consider that death is the radical equalizer, as we all end up the same way? If not, then I invite you to contemplate your inexorable death, because – whether or not you want it to be true – death is in your future!

Oh and, the South still has something to say! I have respect for André 3000, as the moment in time when he stood up on behalf of southern hip hop heads and advocated our perspective, he inadvertently contributed to my knowledge, wisdom, and understanding of life and death. 

If you’re looking for a provider who tries to work to help understand how thinking impacts physical, mental, emotional, and behavioral elements of your life—helping you to sharpen your critical thinking skills, I invite you to reach out today by using the contact widget on my website.

As the world’s foremost hip hop-influenced REBT psychotherapist, I’m pleased to try to help people with an assortment of issues from anger (hostility, rage, and aggression) to relational issues, adjustment matters, trauma experience, justice involvement, attention-deficit hyperactivity disorder, anxiety and depression, and other mood or personality-related matters.

At Hollings Therapy, LLC, serving all of Texas, I aim to treat clients with dignity and respect while offering a multi-lensed approach to the practice of psychotherapy and life coaching. My mission includes: Prioritizing the cognitive and emotive needs of clients, an overall reduction in client suffering, and supporting sustainable growth for the clients I serve. Rather than simply trying to help you to feel better, I want to try to help you get better!

Deric Hollings, LPC, LCSW

Photo credit, fair use

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