The Stamp of a Man

[DISCLAIMER]

In a post entitled Problem Solving in Regard to Anger: How to Eat an Elephant, I stated, “I was taught to provide for and protect girls and women.” Both male and female caregivers relayed this lesson to me, as the stamp of a man regarded the standards and principles up to which I’d live.

Recently, I listened to the song “Fraudulent Cloth”, for the umpteenth time, from the eighth studio album The Thief and the Fallen (2015) by hip hop group Jedi Mind Tricks (lyricists Vinnie Paz and Jus Allah [not featured], and producer Stoupe the Enemy of Mankind).

“Fraudulent Cloth” features soulful vocals by Eamon, as the song essentially defines other tenets of manhood that I was taught in my youth. Herein, I’ll fulfill the “provide for” aspect regarding the stamp of a man. Noteworthy, one source states of the track:

Fraudulent Cloth by Jedi Mind Tricks is a raw, confrontational track that dissects the toxicity of one-sided relationships and the emotional toll of being taken advantage of. The speaker confronts a friend who has exploited their generosity, revealing a deep sense of betrayal and exhaustion.

When considering this track, I realize that the psychoeducational lesson I derive from it, as framed through the proverbial lens of Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy (REBT), doesn’t apply to everyone. For example, there seems to be many men who weren’t raised as I was.

Therefore, the notion of providing for and protecting girls and women may be a foreign concept. Nevertheless, I invite you to assess whether or not the following lyrics of “Fraudulent Cloth” may benefit you, even if you were raised with the stamp of a man that was different than mine:

Our friendship seemed to be based on what I could do for you, homie

The sad fact is I’m the type of person that would take two for you, homie

You ever give so much till a muh’fucker can’t give no more?

Give so much of his soul that he feel he can’t live no more?

What you want from me? You want blood from me, want another dub from me, money?

You wanna drain me of every single motherfucking drop of love from me, money?

I can feel the eyes staring at me, even when it’s dark, even when it’s cold

I can feel Allah staring at me, even though I’m marked, even though I’m old

Y’all are just some “gimme” muh’fuckers, “take more off Vinnie” muh’fuckers

Never giving back, don’t know how to act, just a bunch of shitty muh’fuckers

Gradually, night goes on. Gradually, life goes on

It’s tearing me apart, never really thought that I’d have to right this wrong

I don’t think I’m anti-love, I just think I’m anti-y’all

I just think I’m anti-every-muh’fucker-tryna-plan-my-fall

I was never planning to be great, something that began as a mistake

But me being me, mama always told me I should always share what’s on the plate

Rather than breaking down lyrics through use of REBT concepts, as I typically do, I’ve decided to invite readers of this blogpost to review the hyperlinks regarding portions of the lyrics pertaining to REBT blog entries I’ve already posted, fulfilling a “provide for” tenet of manhood:

And just waking up is enough of a struggle, I don’t wanna deal with the darkness

Have a motherfucker laid up by himself, tryna heal from the conflict

Ever have someone close to you tell you that you really can’t, when you can?

I wouldn't know nothing ‘bout that bullshit, and that’s the stamp of a man

And the same one who blamed me, the same one who defamed me

Can’t make his own cash, can’t wipe his own ass, like a baby

Everything is past, or it’s light; everything is passion and hate

Everything is everything, and I don’t think I need to keep a track of the date

Everybody take what I offer, everybody play like a pauper

The same ones with they hands out be the same ones that hate when I prosper

Tryna be a gentleman of sorts, tryna be a better man, of course

Tryna set a living, understand that I’ma always be a veteran of loss

What’s the physiology of love? What’s the physiology of pain?

What’s the physiology of every single person that will probably get to reign?

I don’t like when liberty is wrong, I don’t like when misery is gone

I can tell all y’all one thing: all y’all gon’ miss me when I’m gone

A portion of the stamp of a man that I was taught as a child is contained in Vinnie Paz’s lyrics. Herein, I’ve provided links for a more in-depth exploration. What I haven’t included in this post is any of the content from Eamon on “Fraudulent Cloth”.

This is because I invite the reader to listen to his voice, as nothing I could type herein would match the power of his vocals. Nonetheless, as I suspect you won’t actually listen to the track, I also doubt that you’ll read information contained in the aforementioned hyperlinks.

Thus, this blogpost will serve well those who are self-motivated. As for everyone else, those who care little about the stamp of a man (or woman, for that matter), the photo for this blog entry may accurately portray your interest in knowledge, wisdom, and understanding: a beautiful end to it.

If you’re looking for a provider who tries to work to help you understand how thinking impacts physical, mental, emotional, and behavioral elements of your life, I invite you to reach out today by using the contact widget on my website.

As the world’s foremost hip hop-influenced REBT psychotherapist, I’m pleased to try to help people with an assortment of issues from anger (hostility, rage, and aggression) to relational issues, adjustment matters, trauma experience, justice involvement, attention-deficit hyperactivity disorder, anxiety and depression, and other mood or personality-related matters.

At Hollings Therapy, LLC, serving all of Texas, I aim to treat clients with dignity and respect while offering a multi-lensed approach to the practice of psychotherapy and life coaching. My mission includes: Prioritizing the cognitive and emotive needs of clients, an overall reduction in client suffering, and supporting sustainable growth for the clients I serve. Rather than simply trying to help you to feel better, I want to try to help you get better!

Deric Hollings, LPC, LCSW

Photo credit, fair use

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