A Gangsta Condition, Cuh

[DISCLAIMER]

When providing psychoeducational lessons on Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy (REBT), I teach people about the ABC model of self-disturbance (how people upset themselves through use of irrational beliefs). Now, I’ll address a finer point of this psychotherapeutic model of wellness.

For context, REBT uses the ABC model to illustrate how when an undesirable Action occurs and you Believe an unhelpful narrative about the event, it’s your unfavorable assumption, not the occurrence itself, that causes an unpleasant Consequence. That negative outcome is disturbance.

In particular, there are four predominate irrational beliefs which people often use to disturb themselves: global evaluations, low frustration tolerance, awfulizing, and demandingness. When contemplating these unproductive Beliefs, think of the acronym GLAD.

It’s worth noting that the two forms of should, must, and ought-type demands with which people most often self-disturb are associated with use of absolutistic and conditional should beliefs. Generally speaking, these serve as rigid commands used toward oneself, others, and life.

An absolute must narrative is, “You absolutely must do as I say!” A conditional should narrative is, “Either you should do as I say, or you should be punished!” Noteworthy, in REBT literature, demandingness of this sort is said to function as a primary appraisal mechanism of disturbance.

Global evaluations (i.e., self-downing, other-downing, and life-downing), low frustration tolerance (also known as frustration intolerance), and awfulizing (e.g., terrible, horrible, etc.) function as secondary appraisal mechanisms. Together, GLAD will make you sad or mad, etc.

While still serving as prescriptive rather than descriptive, flexible use of recommendatory, preferential, ideal, empirical, moral and ethical, and legal ought beliefs won’t inevitably cause disturbance, as they may align with distress. Rigidity versus flexibility makes a difference.

Addressing how people upset themselves with unhelpful attitudes, the ABC model incorporates Disputation of unproductive philosophies of life in order to explore Effective new beliefs. Whereas rigid beliefs cause self-disturbance, flexible beliefs result in an un-disturbed condition.

Noteworthy, natural forms of distress are tolerable (i.e., mild anxiousness, sorrow, frustration, annoyance, disappointment, etc.). Even though unnatural forms of disturbance are also tolerable (e.g., enragement), my approach to REBT seeks the outcome which is more likely to be endured.

Now, I offer a finer point of understanding in regard to the ABC model. There are a number of flexible and inflexible terms related to demandingness which serve as derivatives to “should,” “must,” and “ought” types of self-disturbing philosophies regarding life.

For instance, “In order to understand what I’m saying, you have to pay attention,” “You better not allow your mind to wander,” “You need to listen,” and, “If you want to stop self-disturbing, then you gotta practice REBT.” Perhaps a real-world example may enrich your comprehension.

Before illustrating a demandingness derivative, it may be helpful to add that sometimes mental scripts are accompanied by inferences (the act of passing from one proposition, statement, or judgment considered as true to another whose truth is believed to follow from that of the former).

Notably, the ABC model notes how distorted inferences (misleading conclusions based on illogical and unreasonable beliefs) cause disturbance (i.e., stemming from irrational beliefs) and distress (i.e., stemming from rational beliefs). Now, I submit an example for your review.

Before I illustrate use of an inflexible conditional belief, some context is needed. Throughout my blog, I’ve made no secret of the fact that I once befriended members of the Crips and Sureños street gangs. Even still, I was friends with a number of people from the Bloods street gang.

I am not now, have never been, nor do I foresee myself ever being a validated gang member, known associate, and/or direct affiliate of any criminal organization. Also, I unequivocally denounce any allegation of Racketeer Influenced and Corrupt Organizations Act-related activity.

(Unique disclaimer aside…) Back when I was in high school, Bloods used the terms “dog,” “dawg,” and “dogg” regarding one another. As an example, a high school friend of mine was affiliated with the Pirus (a subset of the larger Bloods gang alliance) and I called him a “dogg.”

Using antiphrasis (the rhetorical device of saying the opposite of what is actually meant in such a way that it is obvious what the true intention is), a close family member of my nicknamed me “B-Dogg,” knowing that I was predominately friends with Crips. I tolerated her teasing well.

In any event, I was surprised by the name of hip hop duo Tha Dogg Pound, composed of West Coast rappers Kurupt and Daz Dillinger, because both rappers were alleged to have been Crips. Alas, who was a high school teenager in Texas to call out West Coast gangstas on terminology?

For clarity, a “gangsta” is a member of an inner-city street gang. Yet, gangstas aren’t merely people who self-assign this term. I was never a gangsta, gangster, gangbanger, or any other derivative thereof. This is a matter worth stating, as “gangsta” is now used as a fashionable term.

Photo credit, property of Sony Pictures Releasing, fair use

Regarding the current blogpost, in 2001—years after I graduated high school, Tha Dogg Pound released their first compilation album, Death Row Presents... Tha Dogg Pound 2002 (simply known as “2002”). On the anthology was the song “Crip Wit Us”. Of note, the hook states:

All my niggas, won’t you Crip with me

All my bitches, won’t you Crip with me

If you ain’t Crippin’, you my enemy

Everybody, won’t you Crip with me

Even though I’d moved on from befriending gang members in Bomb City when the track was released, I recall Crip Walking to the track while in the Marine Corps. This was done to tease a fellow military police (MP) colleague who was allegedly allied with the Bloods.

To add slightly more fuel to the proverbial fire, I called him “cuz” when dancing to the track. In my youth, Crips (and those who befriended them) referred to one another as “cuz,” “cuh,” and “cuttie,” much as Bloods (and associates) were called “dogs.” My MP friend wasn’t amused.

Relevant to the current post, on “Crip Wit Us”, Daz outlines a rigid condition when demanding “if you ain’t Crippin’, you my enemy.” Regarding conditional beliefs, one REBT source states:

[T]he person specifies the conditions that have to be met for an outcome to be achieved (e.g. ‘If I study hard, I should pass my exams’). There is, of course, an element of prediction about this ‘should’, but its defining characteristic is in the specification of the conditions that have to be met for something else to occur.

Thus, conditional should beliefs are often inflexible, irrational, and self-defeating assumptions which are worth challenging, because they cause self-disturbance when one’s conditions aren’t met. This is particularly relevant when considering the REBT tool of unconditional acceptance.

On “Crip Wit Us”, Daz’s if-then condition essentially expresses that if one isn’t a member of the Crips street gang, then one is deemed an enemy (one that is antagonistic to another). Thus, the distorted inference is that one should only be a Crip. One REBT source states about such beliefs:

This ‘should’ denotes that in order for one condition to exist another primary condition must be met. Examples include ‘I should eat healthily in order to become slimmer’ and ‘I must pass the interview in order to be accepted onto the course.’

Ultimately, some conditional shoulds are rational (e.g., I should drink water in order to live) while others are irrational (e.g., you should be a Crip, or else you’re an enemy). Now that you know the difference, I invite you to pay closer attention to the conditions you use, cuh.

If you’re looking for a provider who tries to work to help you understand how thinking impacts physical, mental, emotional, and behavioral elements of your life, I invite you to reach out today by using the contact widget on my website.

As the world’s foremost hip hop-influenced REBT psychotherapist, I’m pleased to try to help people with an assortment of issues from anger (hostility, rage, and aggression) to relational issues, adjustment matters, trauma experience, justice involvement, attention-deficit hyperactivity disorder, anxiety and depression, and other mood or personality-related matters.

At Hollings Therapy, LLC, serving all of Texas, I aim to treat clients with dignity and respect while offering a multi-lensed approach to the practice of psychotherapy and life coaching. My mission includes: Prioritizing the cognitive and emotive needs of clients, an overall reduction in client suffering, and supporting sustainable growth for the clients I serve. Rather than simply trying to help you to feel better, I want to try to help you get better!

Deric Hollings, LPC, LCSW

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