Assault and Battery: Low Frustration Tolerance vs. High Frustration Tolerance
When working in the field of nuclear security, as a subcontracted member of the Federal Protective Forces while serving as a security police officer (SPO) at Pantex, on the outskirts of Amarillo, Texas, I witnessed the crime of assault and battery. For context, one source states:
Assault and battery is the combination of two violent crimes: assault (harm or the threat of harm) and battery (physical violence). This legal distinction exists only in jurisdictions that distinguish assault as threatened violence rather than actual violence.
A separate source adds, “In the terminology of law, an assault is the act of causing physical harm or unwanted physical contact to another person, or, in some legal definitions, the threat or attempt to do so. It is both a crime and a tort and, therefore, may result in criminal prosecution, civil liability, or both.”
Similarly, another source adds, “Battery is a criminal offense involving ‘unlawful intentional infliction of harmful or offensive physical contact with another person without consent’. It may be either simple or aggravated, and is distinct from assault, which is the act of creating reasonable fear or apprehension of such contact.”
Noteworthy, I worked at Pantex from 2004 to 2008. As this blog entry is drafted and posted in 2026, I’ve taken proper precautions to assure that the Texas statute of limitations for assault and battery have expired a relatively long time prior to telling the tale of SPOs X, Y, and Z.
Now, not unlike my time in the United States Marine Corps (1996-2007), I discovered that many male SPOs participated in “gay shit,” which one source describes as an “act or a comment by a person that has queer tendencies, but is not necessarily performed by a homosexual.”
Pertaining to this post, the male SPO locker room had a communal shower in which men cleaned themselves after conducting on-site physical fitness activities. After finishing a workout, I headed to the shower and observed SPO X, who was already in the process of washing himself.
From a distance, I heard SPOs Y and Z, who were members of the same platoon as SPO X, calling out something to the effect of, “Here we come, baby! You ready for some of this lovin’?” I won’t go into detail describing SPO X, because I’m not engaging in dry-snitching herein.
What I’ll say is that SPO X was an older cowboy who had little tolerance for gay shit. Pertaining to the description that applies to this post, the American Psychological Association (APA) defines tolerance as “permissible or allowable deviation from a specified value or standard.”
As SPOs Y and Z entered the shower area, they flanked SPO X on either side of his body. SPO Y goaded the showering cowboy by stating something like, “C’mon, big boy, give us that sweet ass!” SPO Z then verbalized intent to make physical contact with SPO X. That was assault.
SPO X loudly declared that the actions which were taking place weren’t consensual. “I’ve told you fellas, I ain’t with that gay shit,” SPO X announced. At that, both SPOs Y and Z made physical contact with the showering man, grabbing his buttocks while laughing loudly.
That was battery. What happened next was something I didn’t expect. Violence! SPO X quickly exited the shower area, apparently retrieving a leather cowboy belt from his locker, he reentered the communal shower, and he then furiously whipped SPOs Y and Z all over their bodies.
Some of the whelps which were wrathfully applied by the whipping event bled. That, too, was battery. Noteworthy, the APA defines frustration tolerance as “the ability of an individual to delay gratification or to preserve relative equanimity when encountering obstacles.”
All these years later, I now think of what SPO X may’ve believed during the assault and battery event. To address this matter, I now direct your attention to the album War Face (2013) by music producer Kyo Itachi and hip hop duo Dirt Platoon (lyricists Raf Almighty and Snook Da Crook).
The anthology contains the track “Point of Attack” by lyricists Dirt Platoon, Dro Pesci, Skanks, Shabaam Sahdeeq, and Milez Grimez, on which Skanks declares, “I done seen it all, ain’t nothin’ worse you can show me! The fuckin’ nerve of you phonies! That’s why I can’t stand you!”
The phrase “I can’t stand” regards the matter of frustration tolerance, particularly of the low variety. Now, I’ll provide a psychoeducational lesson on Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy (REBT), as I suspect that SPO X used the unhelpful belief, “I can’t stand gay shit!”
First, I thank you for granting me one more hip hop reference. From the drama film Hustle & Flow (2005), released during my time at Pantex, came the Hustle & Flow soundtrack.
It contained the song “Whoop That Trick”, performed by actor Terrance Howard, as acted by his rapper character Djay, and the track was produced by rappers and music producers Al Kapone and Lil Jon. The lyrics state, “Whoop that trick! Get ‘em!” It’s a song about assault and battery.
Now, REBT uses the ABC model to illustrate that when an undesirable Action occurs and you Believe an unhelpful narrative about the event, it’s your unfavorable assumption, not the event itself, that causes an unpleasant Consequence. This is known as distress or disturbance.
Noteworthy, with virtually any undesirable Action that occurs, it’s your unfavorable Beliefs which cause unpleasant distress or disturbance (Consequence). Given this framing of self-distress and self-disturbance, it’s worth noting that one REBT source states (page 71):
REBT conceptualizes [distress] as healthy even though it is intense. Other approaches to therapy have as their goal the reduction of the intensity of negative emotions. They take this position because they do not keenly differentiate between healthy negative emotions (distress) and unhealthy negative emotions (disturbance).
Now, REBT keenly distinguishes between healthy distress and unhealthy disturbance. Healthy distress stems from your rational beliefs about a negative activating event [Action], whilst disturbance stems from your irrational beliefs about the same event.
Complete elimination of distress is highly unlikely in an impermanent and uncertain world, wherein people conceptually suffer, struggle, and battle with, or merely experience hardship. Still, individuals often make matters worse for themselves by disturbing about such instances.
In particular, there are four predominate irrational beliefs which people often use to distress or disturb themselves: global evaluations, low frustration tolerance (LFT), awfulizing, and demandingness. When contemplating these unproductive beliefs, think of the acronym GLAD.
Worth noting, the two forms of should, must, and ought demands with which people most often distress or disturb are associated with use of absolutistic and conditional beliefs. Generally speaking, these scripts serve as inflexible commands used toward oneself, others, and life.
An absolute must narrative is, “You absolutely must do as I say!” A conditional should narrative is, “Either you should do as I say, or you should be punished!” Noteworthy, in REBT literature, demandingness of this sort is said to function as a primary appraisal mechanism of self-upset.
Global evaluations (i.e., self-downing, other-downing, and life-downing), LFT (also known as frustration intolerance), and awfulizing (e.g., terrible, horrible, etc.) function as secondary appraisal mechanisms. Together, GLAD will make you sad or mad, etc.
While still functioning as prescriptive rather than descriptive, flexible use of recommendatory, preferential, ideal, empirical, moral and ethical, and legal ought beliefs won’t inevitably cause disturbance, as they may align with distress. Rigidity versus flexibility makes a difference.
Additionally, from a psychological standpoint, people distress or disturb themselves using a Belief-Consequence (B-C) connection. Of course, this isn’t to suggest that in the context of the naturalistic or physical world there is no Action-Consequence (A-C) connection.
From an A-C point of view, a leather belt struck the wet bodies of SPOs Y and Z (Action), as moderate injuries resulted (Consequence). Yet, from a B-C viewpoint, it was SPO X’s Beliefs which caused negative, though unhealthy rage, anger, and aggression (Consequence).
SPOs Y and Z assaulted and battered SPO X (Action), SPO X plausibly Believed, “SPOs Y and Z are worthless [G], and I can’t stand gay shit [L], as it’s awful [A], so I must whoop these tricks [D],” as he then caused his own negative, though unhealthy rage, anger, and aggression (Consequence).
Addressing how people upset themselves with unhelpful attitudes, the ABC model incorporates Disputation of unproductive philosophies of life in order to explore Effective new beliefs. Whereas rigid beliefs cause self-disturbance, flexible beliefs result in an un-disturbed condition.
Suppose that SPO X used a high frustration tolerance (HFT) Effective belief by instead maintaining, “While I don’t like gay shit or SPOs Y or Z, I can stand behavior and people I don’t like, so it isn’t as though I must whoop anyone. Instead, I’ll get the fuck outta this shower!”
With this Effective new belief, SPO X likely would’ve caused his own negative, but healthy anger and aggression, including behavior by which he maneuvered his way out of the communal shower area and contacted the proper authorities or labor union representative (Consequence).
Regarding assault and battery, LFT versus HFT is a matter of reasoned choice. Whether or not you and I would’ve caused our own negative, but healthy – or negative, though unhealthy – outcomes is entirely up to us. Thus, I tolerated a lot of gay shit in the Marines and at Pantex!
After a while, the tolerable annoyance of men frequently engaging in sexual harassment was something that I anticipated and sometimes healthily self-distressed about rather than unhealthily self-disturbed in relation to. “Of course,” I flexibly told myself, “more gay shit!”
Granted, someone who’s unfamiliar with REBT may read this blogpost and unproductively conclude that I’m advocating the occurrence of assault and battery. Contrarily, I’m advocating that people use personal responsibility and accountability (collectively “ownership”).
I advocate taking control of what one can, exerting influence where one can, and then using personal ownership of how one reacts when realizing how little control and influence one actually has in life. This perspective aligns with the REBT tool of unconditional acceptance.
SPOs Y and Z were going to conduct whatever Action they set out to do, as SPO X had no control or influence over their behavior. Nevertheless, SPO X did have control of how he reacted, as he could’ve influenced his own Consequence by use of an Effective new belief.
Unfortunately, gay shit will inevitably happen! Some people use unhealthy LFT Beliefs and self-disturb about it. Others use healthy HFT Effective beliefs and altogether bypass self-distress, instead choosing to opt for healthy use of humor (e.g., the above-featured meme).
Even my use of the term “gay shit” may now serve as an Action for someone. If that person is you, then what will you do? Will you use unhealthy LFT Beliefs and self-disturb, healthy HFT Effective beliefs and self-distress, or healthy HFT Effective beliefs and simply laugh?
If you’re looking for a provider who tries to work to help understand how thinking impacts physical, mental, emotional, and behavioral elements of your life—helping you to sharpen your critical thinking skills, I invite you to reach out today by using the contact widget on my website.
As the world’s foremost hip hop-influenced REBT psychotherapist, I’m pleased to try to help people with an assortment of issues from anger (hostility, rage, and aggression) to relational issues, adjustment matters, trauma experience, justice involvement, attention-deficit hyperactivity disorder, anxiety and depression, and other mood or personality-related matters.
At Hollings Therapy, LLC, serving all of Texas, I aim to treat clients with dignity and respect while offering a multi-lensed approach to the practice of psychotherapy and life coaching. My mission includes: Prioritizing the cognitive and emotive needs of clients, an overall reduction in client suffering, and supporting sustainable growth for the clients I serve. Rather than simply trying to help you to feel better, I want to try to help you get better!
Deric Hollings, LPC, LCSW
References:
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Hollings, D. (2025, February 28). To try is my goal. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/to-try-is-my-goal
Hollings, D. (2025, April 18). Tolerable FAD. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/tolerable-fad
Hollings, D. (2025, January 9). Traditional ABC model. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/traditional-abc-model
Hollings, D. (2024, October 20). Unconditional acceptance redux. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/unconditional-acceptance-redux
Hollings, D. (2024, March 18). Unhealthy vs. healthy negative emotions. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/unhealthy-vs-healthy-negative-emotions
Hollings, D. (2024, October 26). Unhelpful expectations. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/unhelpful-expectations
Hollings, D. (2023, May 12). Use of humor. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/use-of-humor
Hollings, D. (2024, November 24). Values. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/values
Hollings, D. (2026, November 1). Viewpoint: If You Can’t See My Point of View, Then What’s the Point of You? Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/viewpoint-if-you-can-t-see-my-point-of-view-then-what-s-the-point-of-you
Hollings, D. (2026, August 19). Wisdom and acting justly are one and the same. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/wisdom-and-acting-justly-are-one-and-the-same
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