I Just Can't Take It

[DISCLAIMER]

When providing psychoeducational lessons on Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy (REBT), I teach people about the ABC model of self-disturbance (how people upset themselves through use of irrational beliefs). Now, I’ll address a finer point of this psychotherapeutic model of wellness.

For context, REBT uses the ABC model to illustrate how when an undesirable Action occurs and you Believe an unhelpful narrative about the event, it’s your unfavorable assumption, not the occurrence itself, that causes an unpleasant Consequence. That negative outcome is disturbance.

In particular, there are four predominate irrational beliefs which people often use to disturb themselves: global evaluations, low frustration tolerance (LFT), awfulizing, and demandingness. When contemplating these unproductive Beliefs, think of the acronym GLAD.

It’s worth noting that the two forms of should, must, and ought-type demands with which people most often self-disturb are associated with use of absolutistic and conditional should beliefs. Generally speaking, these serve as rigid commands used toward oneself, others, and life.

An absolute must narrative is, “You absolutely must do as I say!” A conditional should narrative is, “Either you should do as I say, or you should be punished!” Noteworthy, in REBT literature, demandingness of this sort is said to function as a primary appraisal mechanism of disturbance.

Global evaluations (i.e., self-downing, other-downing, and life-downing), low frustration tolerance (also known as frustration intolerance), and awfulizing (e.g., terrible, horrible, etc.) function as secondary appraisal mechanisms. Together, GLAD will make you sad or mad, etc.

While still serving as prescriptive rather than descriptive, flexible use of recommendatory, preferential, ideal, empirical, moral and ethical, and legal ought beliefs won’t inevitably cause disturbance, as they may align with distress. Rigidity versus flexibility makes a difference.

Addressing how people upset themselves with unhelpful attitudes, the ABC model incorporates Disputation of unproductive philosophies of life in order to explore Effective new beliefs. Whereas rigid beliefs cause self-disturbance, flexible beliefs result in an un-disturbed condition.

Noteworthy, natural forms of distress are tolerable (i.e., mild anxiousness, sorrow, frustration, annoyance, disappointment, etc.). Even though unnatural forms of disturbance are also tolerable (e.g., enragement), my approach to REBT seeks the outcome which is more likely to be endured.

Now, I offer a finer point of understanding in regard to the ABC model. There are a number of flexible and inflexible terms related to demandingness which serve as derivatives to “should,” “must,” and “ought” types of self-disturbing philosophies regarding life.

For instance, “In order to understand what I’m saying, you have to pay attention,” “You better not allow your mind to wander,” “You need to listen,” and, “If you want to stop self-disturbing, then you gotta practice REBT.” Perhaps a real-world example may enrich your comprehension.

Before illustrating a demandingness derivative, it may be helpful to add that sometimes mental scripts are accompanied by inferences (the act of passing from one proposition, statement, or judgment considered as true to another whose truth is believed to follow from that of the former).

Notably, the ABC model notes how distorted inferences (misleading conclusions based on illogical and unreasonable beliefs) cause disturbance (i.e., stemming from irrational beliefs) and distress (i.e., stemming from rational beliefs). Now, I submit an example for your review.

On his fifth studio album Lynch by Inch: Suicide Note (2003), lyricist Brotha Lynch Hung (“Lynch”) released the song “Tried to Shoot”. Discussing the sensitive topic of suicide while using an LFT narrative, Lynch stated:

Try’na make it through these hard times, tellin’ my problems

But who cares? Everybody I know got ‘em

I’m upstairs, starin’ out the window, drinkin’ O.E.

I know this bottle really love[s] me. I love you, too

You be helpin’ me through my problems, killin’ my fears

And you understand when I break down, you bring out the tears

And you give me heart, but I just can’t take it

Shit’s hella fucked up, bad luck, just can’t shake it

Halfway to the grave, halfway from birth

Try’na wonder what my life is worth

I think I’m cursed

I put the gun to my head, tried to shoot

I think I’m better off dead. Where’s my kids?

Make sure they ain’t around. Tell ‘em I love ‘em

Tell ‘em bend down on the ground, plug ya ears

What you hear ain’t nothin’ but a cartoon

A bad dream. Your daddy, he comin’ back soon

In another form, reborn, with some great expectations

I’mma miss you, too; believe it

Lynch’s LFT narrative is “I just can’t take it.” When convinced that he literally can’t tolerate another moment of his existence, the lyricist discusses the only option he views as feasible: suicide. Of this, I stated in Suicide and Suicide Attempts: Jumping Out the Window:

When serving as military police (MP) while stationed aboard Camp Kinser, a major logistics base for Marine Corps Forces on Okinawa, Japan from 1997 to 1999, I responded to an emergency call at the Kinser towers (on-base military family housing).

The crisis call related to an attempted suicide in-progress. […] The call to which I responded followed the completed suicide of the service member’s Okinawan spouse within that same year. […]

I recalled the aftereffects regarding the death of the male Marine’s wife. She’d jumped out the window of their seventh story residence at the Kinser towers. The impact of her body striking the ground left an indention in the dirt and grass, as she apparently died on impact. […]

As I stood in front of the large widow at which the man stared, he said to me, “Move out of my way,” to which I immediately replied, “Not on my watch!” Because of the [Action-Consequence (A-C)] connection, my body obstructing his charge to the window kept the service member from dying that night.

Whether jumping out a window or placing a gun to one’s own head, it isn’t an A-C connection that causes suicide attempts and completions. Rather, this is a matter of the Belief-Consequence (B-C) connection. Quite literally, it can serve as a deadly mental script.

In “Tried to Shoot”, Lynch uses an LFT script that retains a distorted inference of demandingness. When telling himself “I just can’t take it,” he unhelpfully infers that life must not be as difficult as it so obviously is (i.e., try’na make it through these hard times).

When using rigid prescriptions such as this, many people unproductively conclude that the only resolution to their problems is to jump out a window, shoot themselves in the head, and otherwise. However, there are other methods of addressing one’s own difficult issues.

Namely, use of disputation regarding irrational beliefs is an option. Noteworthy, I maintain that suicide isn’t always an irrational decision. Nevertheless, use of the ABC model affords an individual like Lynch the ability to consider another option other than use of LFT narratives.

If you’re looking for a provider who tries to work to help you understand how thinking impacts physical, mental, emotional, and behavioral elements of your life, I invite you to reach out today by using the contact widget on my website.

As the world’s foremost hip hop-influenced REBT psychotherapist, I’m pleased to try to help people with an assortment of issues from anger (hostility, rage, and aggression) to relational issues, adjustment matters, trauma experience, justice involvement, attention-deficit hyperactivity disorder, anxiety and depression, and other mood or personality-related matters.

At Hollings Therapy, LLC, serving all of Texas, I aim to treat clients with dignity and respect while offering a multi-lensed approach to the practice of psychotherapy and life coaching. My mission includes: Prioritizing the cognitive and emotive needs of clients, an overall reduction in client suffering, and supporting sustainable growth for the clients I serve. Rather than simply trying to help you to feel better, I want to try to help you get better!

Deric Hollings, LPC, LCSW

Photo credit, fair use

References:

Brothalynchhung. (2022, May 26). Tried to Shoot [Video]. YouTube. Retrieved from https://youtu.be/hwXUZ-kSVxc?si=Xgo46GvK0t3OcRXq

David, D. (2014, January). The empirical status of rational emotive behavior therapy (REBT) theory & practice. Albert Ellis Institute. Retrieved from https://citeseerx.ist.psu.edu/document?repid=rep1&type=pdf&doi=26813393d7370232253cf964c38a4a03d98b0b97

Genius. (n.d.). Tried to Shoot [Image]. Retrieved from https://genius.com/Brotha-lynch-hung-tried-to-shoot-lyrics

Gonzalez, S. (n.d.). On-base housing, Camp Kinser: Kinser towers. Okinawa Hai. Retrieved from https://okinawahai.com/kinser-towers/

Hollings, D. (2024, August 23). A rational case against self-disturbance. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/a-rational-case-against-self-disturbance

Hollings, D. (2024, July 9). Absolutistic should beliefs. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/absolutistic-should-beliefs

Hollings, D. (2025, October 19). Adhering to invisible scripts. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/adhering-to-invisible-scripts

Hollings, D. (2024, November 15). Assumptions. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/assumptions

Hollings, D. (2024, August 7). Awfulizing. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/awfulizing

Hollings, D. (2023, July 2). Can’t go out sad. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/can-t-go-out-sad

Hollings, D. (2024, July 9). Conditional should beliefs. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/conditional-should-beliefs

Hollings, D. (2024, October 27). Correlation does not imply causation. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/correlation-does-not-imply-causation

Hollings, D. (2023, June 26). Ctrl+alt+del. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/ctrl-alt-del

Hollings, D. (2022, October 31). Demandingness. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/demandingness

Hollings, D. (2022, October 5). Description vs. prescription. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/description-vs-prescription

Hollings, D. (2022, March 15). Disclaimer. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/disclaimer

Hollings, D. (2024, March 28). Distorted inferences. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/distorted-inferences

Hollings, D. (2025, March 12). Distress vs. disturbance. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/distress-vs-disturbance

Hollings, D. (2024, July 10). Empirical should beliefs. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/empirical-should-beliefs

Hollings, D. (2025, September 7). Everybody’s gotta learn sometime. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/everybody-s-gotta-learn-sometime

Hollings, D. (2023, September 8). Fair use. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/fair-use

Hollings, D. (2022, November 13). Fear. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/fear

Hollings, D. (2024, May 17). Feeling better vs. getting better. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/feeling-better-vs-getting-better-1

Hollings, D. (2025, March 5). Five major characteristics of four major irrational beliefs. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/five-major-characteristics-of-four-major-irrational-beliefs

Hollings, D. (2024, April 2). Four major irrational beliefs. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/four-major-irrational-beliefs

Hollings, D. (2023, October 12). Get better. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/get-better

Hollings, D. (2023, September 13). Global evaluations. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/global-evaluations

Hollings, D. (2025, September 7). Have to. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/have-to

Hollings, D. (2023, July 13). Holes in the proposal. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/holes-in-the-proposal

Hollings, D. (n.d.). Hollings Therapy, LLC [Official website]. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/

Hollings, D. (2024, July 10). Ideal should beliefs. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/ideal-should-beliefs

Hollings, D. (2024, April 27). Ideal-world vs. real-world. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/ideal-world-vs-real-world

Hollings, D. (2024, May 10). Inferred meaning. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/inferred-meaning

Hollings, D. (2022, August 31). Iss-me vs. iss-you. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/iss-me-vs-iss-you

Hollings, D. (2025, June 13). It isn’t manly to be enraged. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/it-isn-t-manly-to-be-enraged

Hollings, D. (2025, April 23). Judgment. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/judgment

Hollings, D. (2025, October 13). Knowledge, wisdom, understanding. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/knowledge-wisdom-understanding

Hollings, D. (2024, July 10). Legal should beliefs. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/legal-should-beliefs

Hollings, D. (2023, September 19). Life coaching. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/life-coaching

Hollings, D. (2025, January 8). Life-downing. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/life-downing

Hollings, D. (2023, January 8). Logic and reason. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/logic-and-reason

Hollings, D. (2025, November 8). Logical consequence: Does it consequentially follow? Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/logical-consequence-does-it-consequentially-follow

Hollings, D. (2022, December 2). Low frustration tolerance. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/low-frustration-tolerance

Hollings, D. (2024, July 10). Moral and ethical should beliefs. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/moral-and-ethical-should-beliefs

Hollings, D. (2024, September 27). My attitude. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/my-attitude

Hollings, D. (2025, August 2). My philosophy. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/my-philosophy

Hollings, D. (2025, September 8). Need to know. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/need-to-know

Hollings, D. (2024, November 3). Neurotic anxiety and fear. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/neurotic-anxiety-and-fear

Hollings, D. (2024, April 22). On disputing. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/on-disputing

Hollings, D. (2023, April 24). On truth. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/on-truth

Hollings, D. (2025, January 7). Other-downing. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/other-downing

Hollings, D. (2025, April 25). Preferences vs. expectations. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/preferences-vs-expectations

Hollings, D. (2024, July 10). Preferential should beliefs. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/preferential-should-beliefs

Hollings, D. (2023, November 23). Problems. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/problems

Hollings, D. (2024, January 1). Psychoeducation. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/psychoeducation

Hollings, D. (2023, September 15). Psychotherapeutic modalities. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/psychotherapeutic-modalities

Hollings, D. (2024, May 5). Psychotherapist. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/psychotherapist

Hollings, D. (2022, March 24). Rational emotive behavior therapy (REBT). Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/rational-emotive-behavior-therapy-rebt

Hollings, D. (2024, July 18). REBT flexibility. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/rebt-flexibility

Hollings, D. (2024, July 10). Recommendatory should beliefs. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/recommendatory-should-beliefs

Hollings, D. (2024, January 4). Rigid vs. rigorous. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/rigid-vs-rigorous

Hollings, D. (2022, November 1). Self-disturbance. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/self-disturbance

Hollings, D. (2025, January 6). Self-downing. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/self-downing

Hollings, D. (2025, August 3). Self-esteem and self-worth. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/self-esteem-and-self-worth

Hollings, D. (2022, October 7). Should, must, and ought. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/should-must-and-ought

Hollings, D. (2025, October 27). Suicide and suicide attempts: Jumping out the window. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/suicide-and-suicide-attempts-jumping-out-the-window

Hollings, D. (2022, December 23). The A-C connection. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/the-a-c-connection

Hollings, D. (2022, December 25). The B-C connection. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/the-b-c-connection

Hollings, D. (2023, February 16). Tna. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/__tna

Hollings, D. (2025, February 28). To try is my goal. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/to-try-is-my-goal

Hollings, D. (2025, April 18). Tolerable FAD. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/tolerable-fad

Hollings, D. (2024, June 14). Tolerance. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/tolerance

Hollings, D. (2025, January 9). Traditional ABC model. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/traditional-abc-model

Hollings, D. (2024, September 29). Well, well, well. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/well-well-well

Hollings, D. (2025, September 7). You better! Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/you-better

TeknoTurd. (2004, May 27). Hella. Urban Dictionary. Retrieved from https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=hella

Wikipedia. (n.d.). Brotha Lynch Hung. Retrieved from https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Brotha_Lynch_Hung

Wikipedia. (n.d.). Camp Kinser. Retrieved from https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Camp_Kinser

Wikipedia. (n.d.). Curse. Retrieved from https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Curse

Wikipedia. (n.d.). Lynch by Inch: Suicide Note. Retrieved from https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lynch_by_Inch:_Suicide_Note

Wikipedia. (n.d.). Olde English 800. Retrieved from https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Olde_English_800