I Started Thinking With My Mind, and Not My Dick: Which Head Controls You?
Water Underwear – Why so beeg?
As summertime is in full effect, I’m reminded of a conversation that I once had with friend X about bikinis (two-piece bathing suits worn by women, which do not cover the midriff). She laughed when I referred to these popular swimwear items as “water underwear.”
Somehow, people are supposed to abandon thoughts (the process of thinking, an idea, image, opinion, or other product of thinking, and attention or consideration given to something or someone) which are rational (in accordance with both logic and reason) regarding bikinis.
For instance, if a woman wears a bra and panties in public, she may be charged with criminal offenses, such as disorderly conduct, public indecency, or local municipal dress code ordinance violations in some jurisdictions. Yet, if she wears water underwear, there’s no issue.
I’m not complaining, because I happen to enjoy seeing water underwear! Although, I’m reminded of a Brasileira who once protested, “Why so beeg [i.e., big]?” when pointing to a television on which women in the United States were wearing bikinis.
The Brasileira maintained that water underwear preferably should be more akin to “fio dental” (i.e., dental floss) than what she considered “beeg” bikinis. Hey, I’m not here to judge her opinion! If women choose to wear bikinis, water underwear, or fio dental, I have no objection.
Which Head Controls You?
Summertime water underwear season also relates to a conversation I once had with friend Y. He said that when seeing scantily clad women (e.g., thong bikinis), he apparently was unable to maintain control (authority, power, or influence over events, behaviors, situations, or people).
As an example, friend Y—a married man, expressed the belief that when seeing women wearing water underwear, he simply had to initiate a conversation with them. If the seeds of his social labor bore fruit, then he may’ve been able to engage in extramarital sexual intercourse.
When contemplating this matter further, I’m reminded of the song “Right Back” by rapper and singer A Boogie wit da Hoodie, from the album Artist 2.0 (2020), on which he stated, “I started thinking with my mind, and not my dick.” I made a similar decision in 2015, abandoning sex.
As it regards this blogpost, the American Psychological Association succinctly defines the mind as “consciousness or awareness, particularly as specific to an individual.” As well, dick is a vulgar term for penis.
Colloquially, when challenging a man on which head controls him, the implication is that he may be using the head of his dick, rather than his actual head—the place presumed to be where one’s mind functions. Ergo, A Boogie wit da Hoodie started using the latter, not the former.
Personal Ownership
Regarding friend Y’s belief, he was using his dick when interacting with people he found attractive (e.g., women wearing water underwear), rather than using the processes of rational thinking. Thus, he appeared to have genuinely maintained that he was powerless over impulses.
When practicing Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy (REBT), I use personal responsibility and accountability (collectively “ownership”). For improved understanding, responsibility is defined as the quality or state of being responsible, such as a moral, legal, or mental accountability.
Here, “responsible” is defined as liable to be called to account as the primary cause, motive, or agent, and being able to answer for one’s conduct and obligations—something, such as the demands of conscience or custom, that obligates one to a course of action.
Also, “accountable” is defined as subject to giving an account—a statement explaining one’s conduct. Accountability is defined as the quality or state of being accountable, especially regarding an obligation or willingness to accept responsibility or to account for one’s actions.
When providing psychoeducational lessons on REBT, a psychotherapeutic modality which arguably requires that one preferably should take personal ownership in order to reduce self-distress or self-disturbance, I lean heavily on both responsibility and accountability.
This is because I maintain that people have personal agency (a person’s ability to control one’s own reactions to activating events which are beyond one’s own dominion, especially when one’s response is limited by someone or something else). This is a matter of self-empowerment.
The ABC Model
For the sake of argument, suppose that friend Y didn’t have a condition that impaired his impulses (e.g., traumatic brain injury). Also, let’s presume he believed that it was morally good not to commit infidelity, as he was distraught about his lust over water underwear-clad women.
REBT uses the ABC model to illustrate that when an undesirable Action occurs and you Believe an unhelpful narrative about the event, it’s your unfavorable assumption, not the occurrence itself, that causes an unpleasant Consequence. This is known as distress or disturbance.
Noteworthy, with virtually any undesirable Action that occurs, it’s your unfavorable Beliefs which cause unpleasant distress or disturbance (Consequence). Given this framing of self-distress and self-disturbance, it’s worth noting that one REBT source states (page 71):
REBT conceptualizes [distress] as healthy even though it is intense. Other approaches to therapy have as their goal the reduction of the intensity of negative emotions. They take this position because they do not keenly differentiate between healthy negative emotions (distress) and unhealthy negative emotions (disturbance).
Now, REBT keenly distinguishes between healthy distress and unhealthy disturbance. Healthy distress stems from your rational beliefs about a negative activating event [Action], whilst disturbance stems from your irrational beliefs about the same event.
Complete elimination of distress is highly unlikely in an impermanent and uncertain world wherein people conceptually suffer, struggle, and battle with, or merely experience hardship. Still, individuals often make matters worse for themselves by disturbing about such instances.
In particular, there are four predominate irrational beliefs which people often use to distress or disturb themselves: global evaluations, low frustration tolerance, awfulizing, and demandingness. When contemplating these unproductive scripts, think of the acronym GLAD.
Worth noting, the two forms of should, must, and ought demands with which people most often distress or disturb are associated with use of absolutistic and conditional beliefs. Generally speaking, these scripts serve as inflexible commands used toward oneself, others, and life.
An absolute must narrative is, “You absolutely must do as I say!” A conditional should narrative is, “Either you should do as I say, or you should be punished!” Noteworthy, in REBT literature, demandingness of this sort is said to function as a primary appraisal mechanism of self-upset.
Global evaluations (i.e., self-downing, other-downing, and life-downing), low frustration tolerance (also known as frustration intolerance), and awfulizing (e.g., terrible, horrible, etc.) function as secondary appraisal mechanisms. Together, GLAD will make you sad or mad, etc.
While still functioning as prescriptive rather than descriptive, flexible use of recommendatory, preferential, ideal, empirical, moral and ethical, and legal ought beliefs won’t inevitably cause disturbance, as they may align with distress. Rigidity versus flexibility makes a difference.
Additionally, from a psychological standpoint, people distress or disturb themselves using a Belief-Consequence (B-C) connection. Of course, this isn’t to suggest that in the context of the naturalistic or physical world there is no Action-Consequence (A-C) connection.
From an A-C view, numerous extramarital affairs (Action) may result in a divorce (Consequence). However, from a B-C perspective, it isn’t as though friend Y couldn’t control which head motivated him to be unfaithful to his wife. He could’ve taken personal ownership!
For example, friend Y saw women in water underwear (Action), Believed, “It’d be wasteful not to holla at these women [G], ‘cause I couldn’t stand missing this opportunity [L], as that would be awful [A], so I must make my move [D],” and he then cheated on his wife (Consequence).
Addressing how people upset themselves with unhelpful attitudes, the ABC model incorporates Disputation of unproductive philosophies of life in order to explore Effective new beliefs. Whereas rigid beliefs cause self-disturbance, flexible beliefs result in an un-disturbed condition.
Rather than empoweringly using personal ownership – like A Boogie wit da Hoodie who started thinking with his mind, not his dick – friend Y disempoweringly thought with his lower head. That’s the base standard of nonhuman animals!
Suppose that rather than using an unproductive GLAD narrative, friend Y Effectively believed, “Although I really wanna fuck these women, especially those over there in fio dental, I preferably ought to remain faithful to my wife. After all, I’m a man, not a dog!”
I imagine that friend Y wouldn’t have been disturbed into cheating behavior, and subsequently disturbing even more with unhelpful Beliefs which caused a distraught Consequence, because he would’ve settled for distressed disappointment, and kept it moving. That’s quite manly!
Unconditional Acceptance
Noteworthy, REBT also uses unconditional acceptance (UA) to relieve self-induced suffering (e.g., unfulfilled lust). This is accomplished through use of unconditional self-acceptance (USA), unconditional other-acceptance (UOA), and unconditional life-acceptance (ULA).
With my approach to REBT, I incorporate author Stephen Covey’s concepts regarding the circles of control, influence, and concern, as well as an area of no concern. UA maps onto the circle of control (USA), circle of influence (UOA), and circle of concern and area of no concern (ULA).
The circle of control encompasses only oneself, the circle of influence encapsulates elements which may be subject to one’s sway, the circle of concern engrosses most matters one can imagine, and the area of no concern relates to all content which isn’t yet imagined.
Regarding his circle of control and USA, friend Y could’ve admitted that the processes of his mind maintained more control than did his dick. Concerning his circle of influence and UOA, he could’ve acknowledged that water underwear didn’t influence him, though his beliefs did.
Pertaining to his circle of concern and ULA, friend Y could’ve recognized that there’s a finite amount of time one has in life, so living like a man or like a dog was worth considering. As for his area of no concern, an imaginary realm, there’s no such place that actually exists.
Conclusion
Water underwear season is in full swing! Still, as stated by A Boogie wit da Hoodie, “I started thinking with my mind, and not my dick” many years ago, so the head that controls me isn’t covered up by my underwear. Essentially, I’m a man, not a dog, so I control what to believe!
How about you? Do you unproductively believe that when seeing women who are scantily clad, you absolutely must try to engage in sex with them? If so, then I ask which head controls you? Moreover, are you prepared to experience the negative consequences of thinking with your dick?
If you’re looking for a provider who tries to work to help you understand how thinking impacts physical, mental, emotional, and behavioral elements of your life, I invite you to reach out today by using the contact widget on my website.
As the world’s foremost hip hop-influenced REBT psychotherapist, I’m pleased to try to help people with an assortment of issues from anger (hostility, rage, and aggression) to relational issues, adjustment matters, trauma experience, justice involvement, attention-deficit hyperactivity disorder, anxiety and depression, and other mood or personality-related matters.
At Hollings Therapy, LLC, serving all of Texas, I aim to treat clients with dignity and respect while offering a multi-lensed approach to the practice of psychotherapy and life coaching. My mission includes: Prioritizing the cognitive and emotive needs of clients, an overall reduction in client suffering, and supporting sustainable growth for the clients I serve. Rather than simply trying to help you to feel better, I want to try to help you get better!
Deric Hollings, LPC, LCSW
Photo credit, Designed by Magnific, fair use
References:
A Boogie wit da Hoodie. (2020, February 13). A Boogie wit da Hoodie - Right Back [Official audio] [Video]. YouTube. Retrieved from https://youtu.be/tJW0ZchDSns?si=Knz0i992F5ARWybe
APA Dictionary of Psychology. (2018, April 19). Control. American Psychological Association. Retrieved from https://dictionary.apa.org/control
APA Dictionary of Psychology. (2018, April 19). Mind. American Psychological Association. Retrieved from https://dictionary.apa.org/mind
APA Dictionary of Psychology. (2018, April 19). Thought. American Psychological Association. Retrieved from https://dictionary.apa.org/thought
David, D. (2014, January). The empirical status of rational emotive behavior therapy (REBT) theory & practice. Albert Ellis Institute. Retrieved from https://citeseerx.ist.psu.edu/document?repid=rep1&type=pdf&doi=26813393d7370232253cf964c38a4a03d98b0b97
Dryden, W. and Neenan, M. (2006). Rational emotive behaviour therapy: 100 key points and techniques. Routledge. Retrieved from https://img1.wsimg.com/blobby/go/4b0e2552-2a18-4998-b44f-3a993148f7ac/downloads/REBT%202.pdf?ver=1627365797554
Hollings, D. (2025, March 2). A demanded thing is a necessary one. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/a-demanded-thing-is-a-necessary-one
Hollings, D. (2026, June 16). A fountain of goodness: Subjective and objective views. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/a-fountain-of-goodness-subjective-and-objective-views
Hollings, D. (2025, February 21). A rational place. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/a-rational-place
Hollings, D. (2024, July 9). Absolutistic should beliefs. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/absolutistic-should-beliefs
Hollings, D. (2023, March 7). Accepting what is. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/accepting-what-is
Hollings, D. (2026, February 8). Adaptive and maladaptive emotions and behavior. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/adaptive-and-maladaptive-emotions-and-behavior
Hollings, D. (2025, October 19). Adhering to invisible scripts. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/adhering-to-invisible-scripts
Hollings, D. (2023, October 21). Appeal to authority. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/appeal-to-authority
Hollings, D. (2025, September 13). Are your actions ruled by reason? Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/are-your-actions-ruled-by-reason
Hollings, D. (2024, November 15). Assumptions. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/assumptions
Hollings, D. (2024, August 7). Awfulizing. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/awfulizing
Hollings, D. (2026, March 12). Black-and-white thinking: If you don’t condemn it, you condone it. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/black-and-white-thinking-if-you-don-t-condemn-it-you-condone-it
Hollings, D. (2025, November 17). Bloodbending: A moral and ethical dilemma regarding control. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/bloodbending-a-moral-and-ethical-dilemma-regarding-control
Hollings, D. (2025, October 23). Bringing together sound teaching with sound conduct. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/bringing-together-sound-teaching-with-sound-conduct
Hollings, D. (2022, May 17). Circle of concern. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/circle-of-concern
Hollings, D. (2024, July 11). Concern and no concern. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/concern-and-no-concern
Hollings, D. (2024, July 9). Conditional should beliefs. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/conditional-should-beliefs
Hollings, D. (2026, February 12). Consciousness: Reach your soul. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/consciousness-reach-your-soul
Hollings, D. (2023, April 22). Control. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/control
Hollings, D. (2025, October 3). Control and influence: A soft center and coated in a candy shell. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/control-and-influence-a-soft-center-and-coated-in-a-candy-shell
Hollings, D. (2025, September 6). Control what you can. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/control-what-you-can
Hollings, D. (2024, October 27). Correlation does not imply causation. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/correlation-does-not-imply-causation
Hollings, D. (2022, October 31). Demandingness. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/demandingness
Hollings, D. (2022, October 5). Description vs. prescription. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/description-vs-prescription
Hollings, D. (2022, March 15). Disclaimer. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/disclaimer
Hollings, D. (2025, March 12). Distress vs. disturbance. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/distress-vs-disturbance
Hollings, D. (2024, July 10). Empirical should beliefs. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/empirical-should-beliefs
Hollings, D. (2024, December 30). Empowerment. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/empowerment
Hollings, D. (2025, December 5). Evaluations and appraisals: Men are gross, trash, and pigs. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/evaluations-and-appraisals-men-are-gross-trash-and-pigs
Hollings, D. (2023, September 8). Fair use. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/fair-use
Hollings, D. (2024, May 17). Feeling better vs. getting better. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/feeling-better-vs-getting-better-1
Hollings, D. (2026, February 13). Five, four, three… beliefs. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/five-four-three-beliefs
Hollings, D. (2023, October 12). Get better. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/get-better
Hollings, D. (2023, September 13). Global evaluations. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/global-evaluations
Hollings, D. (2024, April 13). Goals. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/goals
Hollings, D. (2026, July 12). Grievance: Complaining and explaining. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/grievance-complaining-and-explaining
Hollings, D. (2026, July 20). Had to. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/had-to
Hollings, D. (2024, August 9). Healthy concern. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/healthy-concern
Hollings, D. (n.d.). Hollings Therapy, LLC [Official website]. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/
Hollings, D. (2024, July 10). Ideal should beliefs. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/ideal-should-beliefs
Hollings, D. (2024, May 24). Imagery. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/imagery
Hollings, D. (2024, October 21). Impermanence and uncertainty. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/impermanence-and-uncertainty
Hollings, D. (2025, September 21). Impugning motive: Swallowing a toad. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/impugning-motive-swallowing-a-toad
Hollings, D. (2026, April 26). Impulse. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/impulse
Hollings, D. (2024, February 14). Insufferable vs. undesirable. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/insufferable-vs-undesirable
Hollings, D. (2026, July 6). It’s not an opinion, it’s a fact: Am I taking crazy pills? Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/it-s-not-an-opinion-it-s-a-fact-am-i-taking-crazy-pills
Hollings, D. (2025, April 23). Judgment. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/judgment
Hollings, D. (2025, October 13). Knowledge, wisdom, understanding. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/knowledge-wisdom-understanding
Hollings, D. (2024, July 10). Legal should beliefs. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/legal-should-beliefs
Hollings, D. (2023, September 19). Life coaching. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/life-coaching
Hollings, D. (2025, January 8). Life-downing. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/life-downing
Hollings, D. (2026, May 17). Listening to reason through argument: Is the rhetoric of whataboutism persuasive? Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/listening-to-reason-through-argument-is-the-rhetoric-of-whataboutism-persuasive
Hollings, D. (2023, January 8). Logic and reason. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/logic-and-reason
Hollings, D. (2022, December 2). Low frustration tolerance. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/low-frustration-tolerance
Hollings, D. (2025, April 16). Mentally corrupt decisions. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/mentally-corrupt-decisions
Hollings, D. (2024, July 10). Moral and ethical should beliefs. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/moral-and-ethical-should-beliefs
Hollings, D. (2023, October 2). Morals and ethics. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/morals-and-ethics
Hollings, D. (2024, September 27). My attitude. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/my-attitude
Hollings, D. (2025, August 2). My philosophy. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/my-philosophy
Hollings, D. (2026, July 9). Nonconscious: Just because you can’t detect the belief doesn’t mean that it isn’t present. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/nonconscious-just-because-you-can-t-detect-the-belief-doesn-t-mean-that-it-isn-t-present
Hollings, D. (2025, January 7). Other-downing. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/other-downing
Hollings, D. (2025, November 17). Pay attention to what’s in front of you. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/pay-attention-to-what-s-in-front-of-you
Hollings, D. (2024, July 20). Perspective shift. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/perspective-shift
Hollings, D. (2024, February 24). Personal agency. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/personal-agency
Hollings, D. (2022, November 7). Personal ownership. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/personal-ownership
Hollings, D. (2025, September 9). Personal responsibility and accountability. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/personal-responsibility-and-accountability
Hollings, D. (2025, September 19). Power. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/power
Hollings, D. (2024, July 10). Preferential should beliefs. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/preferential-should-beliefs
Hollings, D. (2024, January 1). Psychoeducation. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/psychoeducation
Hollings, D. (2023, September 15). Psychotherapeutic modalities. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/psychotherapeutic-modalities
Hollings, D. (2024, May 5). Psychotherapist. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/psychotherapist
Hollings, D. (2022, March 24). Rational emotive behavior therapy (REBT). Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/rational-emotive-behavior-therapy-rebt
Hollings, D. (2025, August 13). Rational versus irrational thoughts and beliefs. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/rational-versus-irrational-thoughts-and-beliefs
Hollings, D. (2024, January 1). Rational vs. irrational. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/rational-vs-irrational
Hollings, D. (2024, July 18). REBT flexibility. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/rebt-flexibility
Hollings, D. (2024, July 10). Recommendatory should beliefs. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/recommendatory-should-beliefs
Hollings, D. (2023, February 17). Revisiting the circle of control. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/revisiting-the-circle-of-control
Hollings, D. (2024, January 4). Rigid vs. rigorous. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/rigid-vs-rigorous
Hollings, D. (2025, October 9). Self-awareness, self-examination, and self-determination. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/self-awareness-self-examination-and-self-determination
Hollings, D. (2026, July 7). Self-distress and distress tolerance. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/self-distress-and-distress-tolerance
Hollings, D. (2022, November 1). Self-disturbance. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/self-disturbance
Hollings, D. (2025, January 6). Self-downing. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/self-downing
Hollings, D. (2026, April 28). Self-motivation: Trying to motivate the unmotivated. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/self-motivation-trying-to-motivate-the-unmotivated
Hollings, D. (2026, April 21). Self-upset. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/self-upset
Hollings, D. (2022, October 7). Should, must, and ought. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/should-must-and-ought
Hollings, D. (2024, February 27). Suffering, struggling, and battling vs. experiencing. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/suffering-struggling-and-battling-vs-experiencing
Hollings, D. (2025, August 6). Take an inventory of your obligations. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/take-an-inventory-of-your-obligations
Hollings, D. (2024, March 19). TBI. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/__tbi
Hollings, D. (2022, December 23). The A-C connection. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/the-a-c-connection
Hollings, D. (2025, December 21). The awful, very bad, horrible, terrible, no good, unacceptable elements of life. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/the-awful-very-bad-horrible-terrible-no-good-unacceptable-elements-of-life
Hollings, D. (2022, December 25). The B-C connection. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/the-b-c-connection
Hollings, D. (2025, October 22). The construct. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/the-construct
Hollings, D. (2022, November 2). The critical A. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/the-critical-a
Hollings, D. (2025, January 2). The distinction between law and justice. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/the-distinction-between-law-and-justice
Hollings, D. (2026, February 21). The preferences versus expectations paradigm: Love is not enough, though virtue is. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/the-preferences-versus-expectations-paradigm-love-is-not-enough-though-virtue-is
Hollings, D. (2026, May 15). The speed of thoughts and beliefs: Flipping the bird. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/the-speed-of-thoughts-and-beliefs-flipping-the-bird
Hollings, D. (2026, April 23). The three traditionally identified components of the mind: Affect, cognition, and conation. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/the-three-traditionally-identified-components-of-the-mind-affect-cognition-and-conation
Hollings, D. (2025, April 15). This cake smells unpleasant. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/this-cake-smells-unpleasant
Hollings, D. (2023, February 16). Tna. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/__tna
Hollings, D. (2025, February 28). To try is my goal. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/to-try-is-my-goal
Hollings, D. (2025, April 18). Tolerable FAD. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/tolerable-fad
Hollings, D. (2025, January 9). Traditional ABC model. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/traditional-abc-model
Hollings, D. (2026, March 14). Trolley problem: Distress or disturbance. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/trolley-problem-distress-or-disturbance
Hollings, D. (2024, October 20). Unconditional acceptance redux. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/unconditional-acceptance-redux
Hollings, D. (2023, March 11). Unconditional life-acceptance. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/unconditional-life-acceptance
Hollings, D. (2023, February 25). Unconditional other-acceptance. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/unconditional-other-acceptance
Hollings, D. (2023, March 1). Unconditional self-acceptance. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/unconditional-self-acceptance
Hollings, D. (2024, March 18). Unhealthy vs. healthy negative emotions. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/unhealthy-vs-healthy-negative-emotions
Hollings, D. (2024, October 26). Unhelpful expectations. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/unhelpful-expectations
Hollings, D. (2025, September 28). War crimes: A rational course of action. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/war-crimes-a-rational-course-of-action
Hollings, D. (2024, August 20). We all make our choices. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/we-all-make-our-choices
Hollings, D. (2026, July 5). Yeah gotta keep it moving: Move around! Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/yeah-gotta-keep-it-moving-move-around
Hollings, D. (2026, March 8). You are not your beliefs or ideas. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/you-are-not-your-beliefs-or-ideas
Hollings, D. (2026, March 26). You’ll have suffered twice. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/you-ll-have-suffered-twice
Hollings, D. (2026, August 23). You’re supposed to be alive. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/you-re-supposed-to-be-alive
Marymarkevich. (n.d.). Young woman laying on sand beach under palm tree leaf [Image]. Magnific. Retrieved from https://www.magnific.com/free-photo/young-woman-laying-sand-beach-palm-tree-leaf_10369151.htm#fromView=detail&position=0&uuid=9202415f-d827-4d5a-a327-6ca147187f71&track=ais_hybrid&from_element=cross_selling__photo
Wikipedia. (n.d.). A Boogie wit da Hoodie. Retrieved from https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/A_Boogie_wit_da_Hoodie
Wikipedia. (n.d.). Artist 2.0. Retrieved from https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Artist_2.0
Wikipedia. (n.d.). Stephen Covey. Retrieved from https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Stephen_Covey
Wiktionary. (n.d.). Brasileira. Retrieved from https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/brasileira
