What's Love Got to Do With It?

[DISCLAIMER]

*What’s Love Got to Do With It (1993) spoilers contained herein.

Photo credit, Property of Touchstone Pictures and Buena Vista Pictures Distribution, fair use

My now-deceased mom was a fan of the late Tina Turner (born Anna Mae Bullock). As such, my mother owned a vinyl record of Private Dancer (1984) and played the song “What’s Love Got to Do with It” loudly from a stereo when cleaning our home. The chorus states:

What’s love got to do, got to do with it?

What’s love, but a second-hand emotion?

What’s love got to do, got to do with it?

Who needs a heart when a heart can be broken?

For context, the American Psychological Association thusly defines love:

[A] complex emotion involving strong feelings of affection and tenderness for the love object, pleasurable sensations in their presence, devotion to their well-being, and sensitivity to their reactions to oneself.

Although love takes many forms, including concern for one’s fellow humans (brotherly love), parental love, erotic love, self-love, and identification with the totality of being (love of God), the triangular theory of love proposes three essential components: passion, intimacy, and commitment.

Social psychological research in this area has focused largely on passionate love, in which sexual desire and excitement predominate, and companionate love, in which passion is relatively weak and commitment is strong.

I didn’t comprehend why my divorced mom sang the song so passionately, as though she’d written it. When singing, was she envisioning the love my mom once had for my dad? My older sister explained to me that track was about heartbreak. Regarding this concept, one source states:

A broken heart (also known as heartbreak or heartache) is a metaphor for the intense emotional stress or pain one feels at experiencing great loss or deep longing.

It is often greatly associated with grief and mourning especially following the death of a loved one. The concept is cross-cultural, often cited with reference to unreciprocated or lost love.

Somewhere out there is a cassette tape of me quoting Tina Turner’s song “We Don’t Need Another Hero (Thunderdome)” (1985), from the soundtrack of the post-apocalyptic dystopian action film Mad Max Beyond Thunderdome (1985), as we were fans of Anna Mae in our home.

After being sent to live with my dad, then back with my mom, only to be transferred to residency within a children’s home, a family with whom I attended church services invited me to live with them during my high school years. I’d mostly forgotten about Tina Turner by that point.

Then, the film What’s Love Got to Do with It (1993) was released. If memory serves, that’s when I truly realized why Tina sang so soulfully on “What’s Love Got to Do With It”, as the movie depicted various forms of abuse that were allegedly committed by her husband Ike Turner.

Since then, I’ve heard people asking “what’s love got to do with it?” Herein, I’ll explore this matter from my view on care for mental, emotional, and behavioral health (collectively “mental health”). Yet, out of respect for Tina Turner, I’ll instead use other artists for examination.

On the collaborative studio album KoleXXXion (2012), by legendary hip hop producer DJ Premier and lyricist Bumpy Knuckles (also known as Freddie Foxxx), is the track “EyEnEvErPuTmY4cUsAwAy”. On the intro, the lyricist humorously states:

I always paid attention to how many cats I would rock with, and who I would work with on projects and everything, because, you know, what’s important is to stay focused on the growth of your brand. You know? Every emcee is a brand.

You know, whether you wanna admit it or not, you know, a lot of cats runnin’ around here screamin’ how they just love hip hop so much, and they rock for the love, and all that. Wish I could walk into Best Buy and say, “Yo, I been buyin’ from y’all for mad years, yo! And it would be my honor if y’all would let me rock wit’ one of them flats screens, right there! Word.

I presume that the inferred meaning to Bumpy Knuckles’s anecdote is “what’s love got to do with it?” Love may be desirable, though it cannot always manifest into tangible outcomes which are aligned with one’s interests and goals.

Of this fact, I’m reminded of the second studio album by lyricist Torae, Entitled (2016), which contains the song “What’s Love”, produced by Praise, and featuring lyricist Pharoahe Monch with a sample of “Ain’t Nothing Like The Real Thing” (1975) by the Dynamic Superiors.

Torae raps, “Gotta love the rush that you get when you feel inspired. Loving how the crowd’ll react[s] when you recite it. Gotta love it, even days when you despise it. I swear, ain’t nothing like it. But love can’t pay these bills, so please believe I’m here to get these mills [millions]!”

Making a similar point as Freddie Foxxx, Torae outlines how desirable love may not be well-aligned with the lyricist’s interests (i.e., wants) and goals (i.e., the ends toward which effort is directed). So, although desirable, what’s love got to do with it? Love isn’t everything!

Still, throughout the years, I’ve worked with people who’ve agonized about lost love. Many of these individuals have treated love as though it was a legitimate need—like oxygen, food, or water, which I argue it isn’t. Worse still, these people have blamed others for their own misery.

When practicing Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy (REBT), I use personal responsibility and accountability (collectively “ownership”). For improved understanding, responsibility is defined as the quality or state of being responsible, such as a moral, legal, or mental accountability.

Here, “responsible” is defined as liable to be called to account as the primary cause, motive, or agent, and being able to answer for one’s conduct and obligations—something, such as the demands of conscience or custom, that obligates one to a course of action.

Also, “accountable” is defined as subject to giving an account—a statement explaining one’s conduct. Accountability is defined as the quality or state of being accountable, especially regarding an obligation or willingness to accept responsibility or to account for one’s actions.

When providing psychoeducational lessons on REBT, a psychotherapeutic modality which arguably requires that one preferably should take personal ownership in order to reduce self-distress or self-disturbance, I lean heavily on both responsibility and accountability.

This is because I maintain that people have personal agency (a person’s ability to control one’s own reactions to activating events which are beyond one’s own dominion, especially when one’s response is limited by someone or something else). This is a matter of self-empowerment.

REBT uses the ABC model to illustrate that when an undesirable Action occurs and you Believe an unhelpful narrative about the event, it’s your unfavorable assumption, not the occurrence itself, that causes an unpleasant Consequence. This is known as distress or disturbance.

Noteworthy, with virtually any undesirable Action that occurs, it’s your unfavorable Beliefs which cause unpleasant distress or disturbance (Consequence). Given this framing of self-distress and self-disturbance, it’s worth noting that one REBT source states (page 71):

REBT conceptualizes [distress] as healthy even though it is intense. Other approaches to therapy have as their goal the reduction of the intensity of negative emotions. They take this position because they do not keenly differentiate between healthy negative emotions (distress) and unhealthy negative emotions (disturbance).

Now, REBT keenly distinguishes between healthy distress and unhealthy disturbance. Healthy distress stems from your rational beliefs about a negative activating event [Action], whilst disturbance stems from your irrational beliefs about the same event.

Complete elimination of distress is highly unlikely in an impermanent and uncertain world wherein people conceptually suffer, struggle, and battle with, or merely experience hardship. Still, individuals often make matters worse for themselves by disturbing about such instances.

In particular, there are four predominate irrational beliefs which people often use to distress or disturb themselves: global evaluations, low frustration tolerance, awfulizing, and demandingness. When contemplating these unproductive scripts, think of the acronym GLAD.

Worth noting, the two forms of should, must, and ought demands with which people most often distress or disturb are associated with use of absolutistic and conditional beliefs. Generally speaking, these scripts serve as inflexible commands used toward oneself, others, and life.

An absolute must narrative is, “You absolutely must do as I say!” A conditional should narrative is, “Either you should do as I say, or you should be punished!” Noteworthy, in REBT literature, demandingness of this sort is said to function as a primary appraisal mechanism of self-upset.

Global evaluations (i.e., self-downing, other-downing, and life-downing), low frustration tolerance (also known as frustration intolerance), and awfulizing (e.g., terrible, horrible, etc.) function as secondary appraisal mechanisms. Together, GLAD will make you sad or mad, etc.

While still functioning as prescriptive rather than descriptive, flexible use of recommendatory, preferential, ideal, empirical, moral and ethical, and legal ought beliefs won’t inevitably cause disturbance, as they may align with distress. Rigidity versus flexibility makes a difference.

Additionally, from a psychological standpoint, people distress or disturb themselves using a Belief-Consequence (B-C) connection. Of course, this isn’t to suggest that in the context of the naturalistic or physical world there is no Action-Consequence (A-C) connection.

From an A-C view, the person in whom you’re romantically interested leaves you (Action) and as a result you’re alone (Consequence). It isn’t this A-C experience which causes a miserable outcome. Rather, your B-C view about lost love does that. What’s love got to do with it anyway?

Your romantic partner leaves you (Action), you Believe, “I’m worthless [G], and I can’t stand being rejected [L], because it’s awful being alone [A], as I must receive love from other people [D],” and then this unaccommodating self-narrative causes unpleasant misery (Consequence).

Addressing how people upset themselves with unhelpful attitudes, the ABC model incorporates Disputation of unproductive philosophies of life in order to explore Effective new beliefs. Whereas rigid beliefs cause self-disturbance, flexible beliefs result in an un-disturbed condition.

In REBT, negative though healthy distress (e.g., disappointment) is viewed as preferable to negative but unhealthy disturbance (e.g., misery), with comprehension that both outcomes are still negative. After all, who would be joyous when one’s intimate partner decided to leave?

You could flexibly and Effectively conclude, “My worth isn’t predicated on who does or doesn’t love me, as I can actually stand it when people leave. Truly, it’s undesirable, though not awful when this happens. Still, what’s love got to do with it all when I don’t need love in order to live?”

Now, it’s worth further noting that REBT uses unconditional acceptance (UA) to relieve self-induced suffering. This is accomplished through use of unconditional self-acceptance (USA), unconditional other-acceptance (UOA), and unconditional life-acceptance (ULA).

With my approach to REBT, I incorporate author Stephen Covey’s concepts regarding the circles of control, influence, and concern, as well as an area of no concern. UA maps onto the circle of control (USA), circle of influence (UOA), and circle of concern and area of no concern (ULA).

The circle of control encompasses only oneself, the circle of influence encapsulates elements which may be subject to one’s sway, the circle of concern engrosses most matters one can imagine, and the area of no concern relates to all content which isn’t yet imagined.

Concerning your circle of control and USA, you could admit that you control only your reaction to unreciprocated love. As well, given your circle of influence and UOA, you could acknowledge that other people are free to keep their love from you, if they so choose.

Additionally, regarding your circle of concern and ULA, you could recognize that in your impermanent and uncertain existence love isn’t guaranteed to anyone, nor is it a legitimate necessity in order to remain alive. Although this is a controversial perspective, it’s also true.

Okay, so your husband (allegedly) abused you. What’s love got to do with it? What’s love, but a second-hand emotion? It isn’t as though you can walk into Best Buy and purchase a television with love. Similarly, love doesn’t pay your bills. Moreover, lack of love doesn’t cause misery.

Taking personal ownership of your own outcomes—even if negative and healthy is as preferable a result as you will endure—may be more beneficial to your mental health than self-deception about how the loss of love is somehow worthy of pointing fingers at others for how you feel.

To quote my younger self from the ‘80s, who said on a cassette tape to my older sister, “We don’t need another hero!” Rather, perhaps what citizens of the world could make do with is daily practice of REBT. Besides, what’s love got to do with it when you instead have REBT?

Also, rest easy, Anna Mae! May you never encounter cake again. One.

If you’re looking for a provider who tries to work to help you understand how thinking impacts physical, mental, emotional, and behavioral elements of your life, I invite you to reach out today by using the contact widget on my website.

As the world’s foremost hip hop-influenced REBT psychotherapist, I’m pleased to try to help people with an assortment of issues from anger (hostility, rage, and aggression) to relational issues, adjustment matters, trauma experience, justice involvement, attention-deficit hyperactivity disorder, anxiety and depression, and other mood or personality-related matters.

At Hollings Therapy, LLC, serving all of Texas, I aim to treat clients with dignity and respect while offering a multi-lensed approach to the practice of psychotherapy and life coaching. My mission includes: Prioritizing the cognitive and emotive needs of clients, an overall reduction in client suffering, and supporting sustainable growth for the clients I serve. Rather than simply trying to help you to feel better, I want to try to help you get better!

Deric Hollings, LPC, LCSW

References:

APA Dictionary of Psychology. (2018, April 19). Abuse. American Psychological Association. Retrieved from https://dictionary.apa.org/abuse

APA Dictionary of Psychology. (2018, April 19). Compassionate love. American Psychological Association. Retrieved from https://dictionary.apa.org/companionate-love

APA Dictionary of Psychology. (2018, April 19). Grief. American Psychological Association. Retrieved from https://dictionary.apa.org/grief

APA Dictionary of Psychology. (2023, November 15). Love. American Psychological Association. Retrieved from https://dictionary.apa.org/love

APA Dictionary of Psychology. (2018, April 19). Mourning. American Psychological Association. Retrieved from https://dictionary.apa.org/mourning

APA Dictionary of Psychology. (2018, April 19). Passionate love. American Psychological Association. Retrieved from https://dictionary.apa.org/passionate-love

APA Dictionary of Psychology. (2018, April 19). Triangular theory of love. American Psychological Association. Retrieved from https://dictionary.apa.org/triangular-theory-of-love

Bro. (2007, February 16). Cat. Urban Dictionary. Retrieved from https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=cat&page=3

David, D. (2014, January). The empirical status of rational emotive behavior therapy (REBT) theory & practice. Albert Ellis Institute. Retrieved from https://citeseerx.ist.psu.edu/document?repid=rep1&type=pdf&doi=26813393d7370232253cf964c38a4a03d98b0b97

DJ Premier. (2022, July 29). EyEnEvErPuTmY4cUsAwAy [Video]. YouTube. Retrieved from https://youtu.be/ZRwU6lM_Soc?si=Vpf40uHo9Y3zY7S0

Dryden, W. and Neenan, M. (2006). Rational emotive behaviour therapy: 100 key points and techniques. Routledge. Retrieved from https://img1.wsimg.com/blobby/go/4b0e2552-2a18-4998-b44f-3a993148f7ac/downloads/REBT%202.pdf?ver=1627365797554

Dynamic Superiors – Topic, The. (2018, July 13). Ain’t Nothing Like The Real Thing [Video]. YouTube. Retrieved from https://youtu.be/8E9sKtm0440?si=K2MDr8h1kyHCvMtR

Hollings, D. (2026, April 20). A cause for concern doesn’t cause concern. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/a-cause-for-concern-doesn-t-cause-concern

Hollings, D. (2025, March 2). A demanded thing is a necessary one. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/a-demanded-thing-is-a-necessary-one

Hollings, D. (2025, January 16). A letting go kind of love. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/a-letting-go-kind-of-love

Hollings, D. (2024, July 9). Absolutistic should beliefs. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/absolutistic-should-beliefs

Hollings, D. (2023, March 7). Accepting what is. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/accepting-what-is

Hollings, D. (2025, October 19). Adhering to invisible scripts. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/adhering-to-invisible-scripts

Hollings, D. (2024, May 8). Alone. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/alone

Hollings, D. (2026, February 14). Anxiety: Stress don’t affect us, that’s just a part of what living is. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/anxiety-stress-don-t-affect-us-that-s-just-a-part-of-what-living-is

Hollings, D. (2025, September 13). Are your actions ruled by reason? Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/are-your-actions-ruled-by-reason

Hollings, D. (2024, November 15). Assumptions. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/assumptions

Hollings, D. (2024, August 7). Awfulizing. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/awfulizing

Hollings, D. (2025, November 17). Bloodbending: A moral and ethical dilemma regarding control. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/bloodbending-a-moral-and-ethical-dilemma-regarding-control

Hollings, D. (2025, October 23). Bringing together sound teaching with sound conduct. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/bringing-together-sound-teaching-with-sound-conduct

Hollings, D. (2024, June 13). Change feels strange. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/change-feels-strange

Hollings, D. (2022, May 17). Circle of concern. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/circle-of-concern

Hollings, D. (2024, July 11). Concern and no concern. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/concern-and-no-concern

Hollings, D. (2024, July 9). Conditional should beliefs. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/conditional-should-beliefs

Hollings, D. (2026, February 12). Consciousness: Reach your soul. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/consciousness-reach-your-soul

Hollings, D. (2023, April 22). Control. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/control

Hollings, D. (2025, September 6). Control what you can. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/control-what-you-can

Hollings, D. (2024, October 27). Correlation does not imply causation. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/correlation-does-not-imply-causation

Hollings, D. (2025, June 17). Daily practice. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/daily-practice

Hollings, D. (2022, October 31). Demandingness. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/demandingness

Hollings, D. (2022, October 5). Description vs. prescription. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/description-vs-prescription

Hollings, D. (2024, October 21). Desire. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/desire

Hollings, D. (2022, March 15). Disclaimer. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/disclaimer

Hollings, D. (2025, March 12). Distress vs. disturbance. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/distress-vs-disturbance

Hollings, D. (2024, July 10). Empirical should beliefs. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/empirical-should-beliefs

Hollings, D. (2024, December 30). Empowerment. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/empowerment

Hollings, D. (2025, December 5). Evaluations and appraisals: Men are gross, trash, and pigs. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/evaluations-and-appraisals-men-are-gross-trash-and-pigs

Hollings, D. (2025, December 13). Explanation and justification. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/explanation-and-justification

Hollings, D. (2023, September 8). Fair use. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/fair-use

Hollings, D. (2024, May 17). Feeling better vs. getting better. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/feeling-better-vs-getting-better-1

Hollings, D. (2026, February 13). Five, four, three… beliefs. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/five-four-three-beliefs

Hollings, D. (2024, February 13). Focus on the target problem. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/focus-on-the-target-problem

Hollings, D. (2023, October 12). Get better. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/get-better

Hollings, D. (2023, September 13). Global evaluations. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/global-evaluations

Hollings, D. (2024, April 13). Goals. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/goals

Hollings, D. (2025, November 9). Gotta change the world. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/gotta-change-the-world

Hollings, D. (2026, April 1). Gotta figure this shit out. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/gotta-figure-this-shit-out

Hollings, D. (2024, August 9). Healthy concern. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/healthy-concern

Hollings, D. (2024, February 24). High frustration tolerance. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/high-frustration-tolerance

Hollings, D. (n.d.). Hollings Therapy, LLC [Official website]. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/

Hollings, D. (2024, July 10). Ideal should beliefs. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/ideal-should-beliefs

Hollings, D. (2024, October 21). Impermanence and uncertainty. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/impermanence-and-uncertainty

Hollings, D. (2025, September 21). Impugning motive: Swallowing a toad. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/impugning-motive-swallowing-a-toad

Hollings, D. (2024, May 10). Inferred meaning. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/inferred-meaning

Hollings, D. (2024, February 14). Insufferable vs. undesirable. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/insufferable-vs-undesirable

Hollings, D. (2026, February 8). Is It Desire, or Is It Love? Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/is-it-desire-or-is-it-love

Hollings, D. (2024, January 2). Interests and goals. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/interests-and-goals

Hollings, D. (2026, March 11). Just the facts. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/just-the-facts

Hollings, D. (2025, October 13). Knowledge, wisdom, understanding. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/knowledge-wisdom-understanding

Hollings, D. (2024, July 10). Legal should beliefs. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/legal-should-beliefs

Hollings, D. (2023, September 19). Life coaching. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/life-coaching

Hollings, D. (2025, January 8). Life-downing. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/life-downing

Hollings, D. (2022, December 2). Low frustration tolerance. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/low-frustration-tolerance

Hollings, D. (2024, March 4). Mental, emotional, and behavioral health. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/mental-emotional-and-behavioral-health

Hollings, D. (2025, November 16). Mental health, mental illness, and mental disorder. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/mental-health-mental-illness-and-mental-disorder

Hollings, D. (2025, April 16). Mentally corrupt decisions. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/mentally-corrupt-decisions

Hollings, D. (2026, March 7). Mind, body, and soul. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/mind-body-soul

Hollings, D. (2024, July 10). Moral and ethical should beliefs. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/moral-and-ethical-should-beliefs

Hollings, D. (2024, September 27). My attitude. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/my-attitude

Hollings, D. (2025, August 2). My philosophy. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/my-philosophy

Hollings, D. (2023, September 3). On feelings. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/on-feelings

Hollings, D. (2025, July 13). On passion. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/on-passion

Hollings, D. (2023, April 24). On truth. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/on-truth

Hollings, D. (2025, June 17). One. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/__one

Hollings, D. (2025, January 7). Other-downing. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/other-downing

Hollings, D. (2025, March 5). Pain. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/pain

Hollings, D. (2024, February 24). Personal agency. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/personal-agency

Hollings, D. (2022, November 7). Personal ownership. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/personal-ownership

Hollings, D. (2025, September 9). Personal responsibility and accountability. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/personal-responsibility-and-accountability

Hollings, D. (2025, April 25). Preferences vs. expectations. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/preferences-vs-expectations

Hollings, D. (2024, July 10). Preferential should beliefs. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/preferential-should-beliefs

Hollings, D. (2024, January 1). Psychoeducation. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/psychoeducation

Hollings, D. (2023, September 15). Psychotherapeutic modalities. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/psychotherapeutic-modalities

Hollings, D. (2024, May 5). Psychotherapist. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/psychotherapist

Hollings, D. (2022, March 24). Rational emotive behavior therapy (REBT). Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/rational-emotive-behavior-therapy-rebt

Hollings, D. (2025, August 13). Rational versus irrational thoughts and beliefs. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/rational-versus-irrational-thoughts-and-beliefs

Hollings, D. (2024, January 1). Rational vs. irrational. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/rational-vs-irrational

Hollings, D. (2024, March 14). REBT and emotions. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/rebt-and-emotions

Hollings, D. (2024, July 18). REBT flexibility. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/rebt-flexibility

Hollings, D. (2024, July 10). Recommendatory should beliefs. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/recommendatory-should-beliefs

Hollings, D. (2023, February 17). Revisiting the circle of control. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/revisiting-the-circle-of-control

Hollings, D. (2024, January 4). Rigid vs. rigorous. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/rigid-vs-rigorous

Hollings, D. (2025, January 15). Satisfaction. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/satisfaction

Hollings, D. (2022, November 1). Self-disturbance. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/self-disturbance

Hollings, D. (2025, January 6). Self-downing. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/self-downing

Hollings, D. (2024, November 3). Self-love and self-respect. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/self-love-and-self-respect

Hollings, D. (2026, April 21). Self-upset. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/self-upset

Hollings, D. (2024, April 21). Sensation. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/sensation

Hollings, D. (2026, April 13). Shackled and miserable. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/shackled-and-miserable

Hollings, D. (2022, October 7). Should, must, and ought. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/should-must-and-ought

Hollings, D. (2025, January 10). Who is the one to blame? Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/who-is-the-one-to-blame

Styne, (2003, February 22). Word. Urban Dictionary. Retrieved from https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=word

Hollings, D. (2024, February 27). Suffering, struggling, and battling vs. experiencing. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/suffering-struggling-and-battling-vs-experiencing

Hollings, D. (2025, August 6). Take an inventory of your obligations. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/take-an-inventory-of-your-obligations

Hollings, D. (2022, December 23). The A-C connection. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/the-a-c-connection

Hollings, D. (2025, December 21). The awful, very bad, horrible, terrible, no good, unacceptable elements of life. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/the-awful-very-bad-horrible-terrible-no-good-unacceptable-elements-of-life

Hollings, D. (2022, December 25). The B-C connection. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/the-b-c-connection

Hollings, D. (2022, November 2). The critical A. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/the-critical-a

Hollings, D. (2025, January 2). The distinction between law and justice. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/the-distinction-between-law-and-justice

Hollings, D. (2026, February 21). The preferences versus expectations paradigm: Love is not enough, though virtue is. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/the-preferences-versus-expectations-paradigm-love-is-not-enough-though-virtue-is

Hollings, D. (2022, November 22). The thief of joy. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/the-thief-of-joy

Hollings, D. (2025, April 15). This cake smells unpleasant. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/this-cake-smells-unpleasant

Hollings, D. (2023, February 16). Tna. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/__tna

Hollings, D. (2025, February 28). To try is my goal. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/to-try-is-my-goal

Hollings, D. (2025, April 18). Tolerable FAD. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/tolerable-fad

Hollings, D. (2025, January 9). Traditional ABC model. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/traditional-abc-model

Hollings, D. (2026, March 14). Trolley problem: Distress or disturbance. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/trolley-problem-distress-or-disturbance

Hollings, D. (2024, October 20). Unconditional acceptance redux. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/unconditional-acceptance-redux

Hollings, D. (2023, March 11). Unconditional life-acceptance. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/unconditional-life-acceptance

Hollings, D. (2023, February 25). Unconditional other-acceptance. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/unconditional-other-acceptance

Hollings, D. (2023, March 1). Unconditional self-acceptance. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/unconditional-self-acceptance

Hollings, D. (2024, March 18). Unhealthy vs. healthy negative emotions. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/unhealthy-vs-healthy-negative-emotions

Hollings, D. (2024, October 26). Unhelpful expectations. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/unhelpful-expectations

Hollings, D. (2023, May 3). Want vs. need. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/want-vs-need

Hollings, D. (2025, September 28). War crimes: A rational course of action. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/war-crimes-a-rational-course-of-action

Hollings, D. (2024, September 29). Well, well, well. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/well-well-well

Hollings, D. (2026, March 26). You’ll have suffered twice. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/you-ll-have-suffered-twice

IMP Awards. (n.d.). What’s Love Got to Do With It (1993) [Image]. Internet Movie Poster Awards. Retrieved from http://www.impawards.com/1993/whats_love_got_to_do_with_it.html

Jones, G. (2019, May 14). Torae & Praise: All praises due. Rapreviews.com. Retrieved from https://www.rapreviews.com/2019/05/torae-praise-all-praises-due/

Merin. (2002, October 9). Rock. Urban Dictionary. Retrieved from https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=rock&page=2

SVex. (2005, January 17). Mad. Urban Dictionary. Retrieved from https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=mad

Tina Turner. (2009, March 13). Tina Turner – What’s Love Got to Do With It (Official video) [HD] [Video]. YouTube. Retrieved from https://youtu.be/oGpFcHTxjZs?si=4stj_sRUCnBRsrV2

Tina Turner. (2017, February 18). We Don’t Need Another Hero (Thunderdome) [Video]. YouTube. Retrieved from https://youtu.be/JgFZr2U7U4o?si=ipumpIxKIbUuyUla

Torae. (2013, February 27). Torae feat. Pharoahe Monch “What’s Love” (prod by Praise) [Video]. YouTube. Retrieved from https://youtu.be/yZORGJ7A0DE?si=yqsiG0TaxADwHuYd

Wikipedia. (n.d.). Best Buy. Retrieved from https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Best_Buy

Wikipedia. (n.d.). Broken heart. Retrieved from https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Broken_heart

Wikipedia. (n.d.). Cassette tape. Retrieved from https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cassette_tape

Wikipedia. (n.d.). DJ Premier. Retrieved from https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/DJ_Premier

Wikipedia. (n.d.). Dynamic Superiors. Retrieved from https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dynamic_Superiors

Wikipedia. (n.d.). Entitled (album). Retrieved from https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Entitled_(album)

Wikipedia. (n.d.). Freddie Foxxx. Retrieved from https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Freddie_Foxxx

Wikipedia. (n.d.). Ike Turner. Retrieved from https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ike_Turner

Wikipedia. (n.d.). Kolexxxion. Retrieved from https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kolexxxion

Wikipedia. (n.d.). Mad Max Beyond Thunderdome. Retrieved from https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mad_Max_Beyond_Thunderdome

Wikipedia. (n.d.). Master of ceremonies. Retrieved from https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Master_of_ceremonies

Wikipedia. (n.d.). Pharoahe Monch. Retrieved from https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pharoahe_Monch

Wikipedia. (n.d.). Phonograph record. Retrieved from https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Phonograph_record

Wikipedia. (n.d.). Private Dancer. Retrieved from https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Private_Dancer

Wikipedia. (n.d.). Stephen Covey. Retrieved from https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Stephen_Covey

Wikipedia. (n.d.). Tina Turner. Retrieved from https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tina_Turner

Wikipedia. (n.d.). Torae. Retrieved from https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Torae

Wikipedia. (n.d.). Unrequited love. Retrieved from https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Unrequited_love

Wikipedia. (n.d.). What’s Love Got to Do with It (1993 film). Retrieved from https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/What%27s_Love_Got_to_Do_with_It_(1993_film)