Girl Dads and Wife Guys: Care, Custody, and Control vs. Agency and Ownership
I Was Once a Girl Dad, Wife Guy, and Feminist
When serving in the United States Marine Corps (1996-2007), I met a female Marine (i.e., woman) who was physically separated from her male Marine husband (i.e., man). Together, they had a daughter (i.e., girl) who was six-months-old at the time when I first met her.
After finalizing her divorce, the woman proposed to me and I accepted her hand in marriage (2002). Thus, her daughter became my stepdaughter. Although our marriage eventually dissolved (2006), I was once a girl dad and wife guy.
Describing the term girl dad, often used pejoratively, one source states that it’s “similar to a malewife [a man who can play the part of the wife and is noticeably feminine], in which a man takes up traditionally women’s roles.” For example, I took my stepdaughter on shopping sprees.
Also typically used pejoratively, one source describes the term wife guy as “a phenomenon of men online who post devotedly about their wives, often to a suspicious degree, as though they were doing so for some means of personal gain.” For instance, I praised my wife in public.
Years after my divorce, I attended graduate school for counseling (2009-2011), identifying with the principles of feminism, which the American Psychological Association (APA) defines as “any of a number of perspectives that take as their subject matter the problems and perspectives of women or the nature of biological and social phenomena related to gender.”
In common parlance, feminism is merely belief in and advocacy of the political, economic, and social equality of the sexes, expressed especially through organized activity on behalf of women’s rights and interests. Noteworthy, I stated in The False Dilemma of Anti-Fascism:
In a blogpost entitled Feminism, I discussed how it came to be that I once identified as a feminist. Regarding this matter, I said of an interaction with my former coworker and friend (“Penelope”):
One day, Penelope heard me use the term “feminazi” and she questioned whether or not I was anti-feminist. I wasn’t. A self-declared feminist, Penelope pulled up on her computer the Merriam-Webster definition of feminism and had me read it aloud.
Though modified since then, the description at that time was, “Belief in and advocacy of the political, economic, and social equality of the sexes.” Penelope added that, “Feminism is the radical notion that women are people.”
I was then asked by Penelope whether or not I supported her implied right to earn as much as her male counterparts, which I did. I was also asked whether or not I thought women were entitled to the same rights, privileges, and liberties as men, which I did.
Penelope then answered, “Well, that makes you a feminist.” Though I’d received a brief introduction to feminist theory in counseling, when undergoing my graduate studies, it wasn’t a topic of interest to me and I paid it little attention.
Penelope’s low bar for admission into a sociopolitical movement, and my apathy related to the theoretical and philosophical principles underlying the cause, gave way to my self-identification as a feminist. Still, I took issue with a term that highlighted one sex [i.e., male or female] or gender [i.e., girls, boys, women, and men] over another.
When undergoing graduate studies in social work (2012-2014), radical feminists with whom I attended school helped me to arrive at the conclusion that feminism was largely a me problem posing as a you problem, or what my dad used to call an iss-ME versus an iss-YOU (i.e., issue).
Allyship – Care, Custody, and Control: Personal Agency and Ownership
Now, as Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy (REBT) was formed by the late psychologist Albert Ellis, who reportedly developed the first cognitive behavior therapy (CBT) psychotherapeutic modality in 1955, this blog entry is part of an ongoing series regarding his book, Ask Albert Ellis?: Straight Answers and Sound Advice from America’s Best-Known Psychologist.
Arguably, both REBT and CBT reject disempowering perspectives of the individual (e.g., a me problem) when placed into the realm of the collective (e.g., a you problem). As an example, consider the controversial case of the 2024 Cornell University rape allegations.
As the questionable narrative currently stands, Jane Doe (i.e., a woman) was allegedly sexually assaulted and/or raped by male members of the Chi Phi fraternity chapter at Cornell University, pejoratively dubbed “the Cornell 7” (i.e., seven men). I favor due process, as I reserve judgment.
Nevertheless, I’m able to view this matter through the retrospective proverbial lens of my former identification as a girl dad, wife guy, and feminist. In particular, especially regarding both graduate studies programs which I attended, I was taught allyship, about which one source states:
Allyship is an English-language neologism used in contemporary social justice activism to describe efforts by groups of people to advance the interests of marginalized groups both in society at large and in particular social contexts, for example universities or workplaces.
The term and related behaviors are controversial, with critics alleging that allyship is an ideological, performative, and insincere notion that may ignore prior concepts of tolerance and solidarity.
Anecdotally, I’ve observed radical and non-radical feminists making claims which are irrational (not in accordance with both logic and reason) and antithetical (directly opposite or opposed) to the principles of feminism, as these matters regard Doe and the so-called Cornell 7.
Rather than be accused of straw-manning this matter, allow me to offer evidence pertaining to my subjective observation. In the civil litigation document filed on behalf of Doe, her legal counsel appears to claim, “At all relevant times, Plaintiff [i.e., Doe] was in the care, custody, and control of Defendant CORNELL when she was sexually abused by Defendants [i.e., Cornell 7].”
In this regard, care is painstaking or watchful attention; custody is immediate charge and control, as over a ward or a suspect, exercised by a person or an authority; and control is to exercise restraining or directing influence over, as in to have power over. These elements regard parents.
As an example, a mom or dad is tasked with the care, custody, and control of a little girl. From this perspective, I argue that it’s disempoweringly infantilizing to deny that an individual in the age of majority (i.e., an adult) isn’t tasked with one’s own care, custody, and control!
Now, when practicing REBT, I use personal responsibility and accountability (collectively “ownership”). For improved understanding, responsibility is defined as the quality or state of being responsible, such as a moral, legal, or mental accountability.
Here, “responsible” is defined as liable to be called to account as the primary cause, motive, or agent, and being able to answer for one’s conduct and obligations—something, such as the demands of conscience or custom, that obligates one to a course of action.
Also, “accountable” is defined as subject to giving an account—a statement explaining one’s conduct. Accountability is defined as the quality or state of being accountable, especially regarding an obligation or willingness to accept responsibility or to account for one’s actions.
When providing psychoeducational lessons on REBT, a psychotherapeutic modality which arguably requires that one preferably should take personal ownership in order to reduce self-distress or self-disturbance, I lean heavily on both responsibility and accountability.
This is because I maintain that people have personal agency (a person’s ability to control one’s own reactions to activating events which are beyond one’s own dominion, especially when one’s response is limited by someone or something else). This is a matter of self-empowerment.
When recently listening to an episode of the DarkHorse Podcast by biologists Bret Weinstein and Heather Heying, I heard discussion about Doe and the so-called Cornell 7. Specifically, outlining a me problem posing as a you problem, Heying stated:
Was she [Doe] not at any moment under her own care, custody, or control? Has she no agency? Has she no ability to take responsibility for anything that happened? And again if she had been actually assaulted, non-consensually, those are… that’s a different situation.
But that still doesn’t mean that the entire world is responsible for you and you are not responsible for you. The math doesn’t work out. The idea that Ingalls [member of the so-called Cornell 7], who I think, frankly, is the most despicable of the defendants here, he is the one with whom she actually had a prior sexual relationship, was romantically interested, was interested in that first threesome and the last one, which also included him.
And at the point that he almost passes out because he’s had too much drug and drink, she stops the sexual activity she’s involved in to go tend to him. Like, she actually likes this guy. She’s got terrible taste in men. But he’s supposed to have her care, custody, and control in his mind, and she isn’t supposed to have it in hers. […]
The idea here is that she was supposed to… to be in the care, custody, and control of all of these men, and the institution, and the frat house, and the university. This is not that they were controlling her. The idea, this is being… this is being brought up as what should have been happening.
She was supposed to be in everyone’s care, custody, and control except for herself. She had no responsibility. She was not in her own care, custody, and control. She was supposedly in all of theirs. And they therefore betrayed her trust in them, because they did not take care, custody, and control of her in an appropriate way. […]
So, the men always stopped whenever she said no. And then they did something else, and she said yes. She consented. She assented. But she spent hours doing things that at the time, time… at the time, she was conscious and not coerced.
And now we’re seeing reports of her, you know, jumping up from the bed and flexing, doing bodybuilder poses. She doesn’t, she… she does say at one point that she agreed to more ketamine at some point, because she thought, ‘Well, maybe I’ll pass out. And then if they have sex with me, that would be rape.’
So, there’s something in her head about… about the situation is out of control. ‘I don’t know how to fix it, and I don’t know what I’m doing here.’ Which is all consistent with a confused young woman who walked into a situation with someone who she thought was into her. The only thing he’s into is being in her and, and having his frat brothers enjoy her as well. There’s no, there’s no relationship here at all. […]
I think this framing of the care, custody, and control that everyone else was supposed to have over the plaintiff Jane Doe, and she was not supposed to apparently have any of it over herself, would seem to reverse some of the expectations as well. Like she, she wasn’t taking responsibility. She didn’t have autonomy.
She doesn’t claim to have to have been seeking care, custody, or control for herself. She was expecting everyone else in her environs to do that for her. And that, too, would seem to change what a violation will feel like. If you’re walking around assuming that the entire world is taking care of you, you’re never responsible for your own actions.
Everything’s going fine until something happens that you decide you don’t like, or someone else tells you you don’t like, and you say, ‘Oh, well, then that was someone else’s responsibility to keep me from doing it,’ as opposed to, ‘Oh my God, that thing just happened to me and it was horrifying, and I need for that never to happen again. And how do I get through this, and how do I gain my sense of autonomy and agency back?’
I’ve provided a lengthy perspective by Heying—someone, as I understand, who also once identified as a feminist—as a method of steel-manning my own worldview of the Doe v. so-called Cornell 7 case. As presented, Doe ostensibly doesn’t have personal agency and ownership.
This is irrational and antithetical to the principles of feminism! A woman is in the care, custody, and control of herself… until or unless she disempoweringly isn’t? At what point do her agency, responsibility, and accountability dissolve? Is this a feminist perspective?
And if it fades so quickly, was it ever meaningfully present? In the apparent case of Doe and the so-called Cornell 7, if all parties were ostensibly impaired by the effects of substance use or substance abuse, then doesn’t that mean that agency and ownership for all parties is in question?
And if so, then why are girl dads, wife guys, and feminist-acting men like political commentator Tucker Carlson, who recently interviewed political commentator Megyn Kelly regarding the Doe v. so-called Cornell 7 case, not applying consistent standards towards both women and men?
REBT and Shame
Rather than white-knighting on behalf of girls and women, or infantilizing females by declaring that virtually everyone except for girls and women are charged with the care, custody, and control of females, I apply my empowering approach to REBT and CBT regarding this matter!
Now, REBT uses the ABC model to illustrate that when an undesirable Action occurs and you Believe an unhelpful narrative about the event, it’s your unfavorable assumption, not the event itself, that causes an unpleasant Consequence. This is known as distress or disturbance.
Noteworthy, with virtually any undesirable Action that occurs, it’s your unfavorable Beliefs which cause unpleasant distress or disturbance (Consequence). Given this framing of self-distress and self-disturbance, it’s worth noting that one REBT source states (page 71):
REBT conceptualizes [distress] as healthy even though it is intense. Other approaches to therapy have as their goal the reduction of the intensity of negative emotions. They take this position because they do not keenly differentiate between healthy negative emotions (distress) and unhealthy negative emotions (disturbance).
Now, REBT keenly distinguishes between healthy distress and unhealthy disturbance. Healthy distress stems from your rational beliefs about a negative activating event [Action], whilst disturbance stems from your irrational beliefs about the same event.
Complete elimination of distress is highly unlikely in an impermanent and uncertain world, wherein people conceptually suffer, struggle, and battle with, or merely experience hardship. Still, individuals often make matters worse for themselves by disturbing about such instances.
In particular, there are four predominate irrational beliefs which people often use to distress or disturb themselves: global evaluations, low frustration tolerance, awfulizing, and demandingness. When contemplating these unproductive scripts, think of the acronym GLAD.
Worth noting, the two forms of should, must, and ought demands with which people most often distress or disturb are associated with use of absolutistic and conditional beliefs. Generally speaking, these scripts serve as inflexible commands used toward oneself, others, and life.
An absolute must narrative is, “You absolutely must do as I say!” A conditional should narrative is, “Either you should do as I say, or you should be punished!” Noteworthy, in REBT literature, demandingness of this sort is said to function as a primary appraisal mechanism of self-upset.
Global evaluations (i.e., self-downing, other-downing, and life-downing), low frustration tolerance (also known as frustration intolerance), and awfulizing (e.g., terrible, horrible, etc.) function as secondary appraisal mechanisms. Together, GLAD will make you sad or mad, etc.
While still functioning as prescriptive rather than descriptive, flexible use of recommendatory, preferential, ideal, empirical, moral and ethical, and legal ought beliefs won’t inevitably cause disturbance, as they may align with distress. Rigidity versus flexibility makes a difference.
Additionally, from a psychological standpoint, people distress or disturb themselves using a Belief-Consequence (B-C) connection. Of course, this isn’t to suggest that in the context of the naturalistic or physical world there is no Action-Consequence (A-C) connection.
From an A-C view, hypothetical woman X and men Y use substances during a gang bang (Action), thus calling into question the agency and ownership of all their ability to consent to sex (Consequence). Still, it’s the B-C connection that results in woman X’s associated shame.
For context, the APA defines shame as “a highly unpleasant self-conscious emotion arising from the sense of there being something dishonorable, immodest, or indecorous in one’s own conduct or circumstances.” In this example, woman X endures negative, but unhealthy shame.
Thus, woman X regrets her substance-fueled gang bang (Action) by Believing, “I’m worthless for having defiled myself [G], and I can’t tolerate this [L], as it’s awful to be seen as a ho [A], so I shouldn’t have participated in a gang bang [D],” and she then endures shame (Consequence).
Addressing how people upset themselves with unhelpful attitudes, the ABC model incorporates Disputation of unproductive philosophies of life in order to explore Effective new beliefs. Whereas rigid beliefs cause self-disturbance, flexible beliefs result in an un-disturbed condition.
Additionally, REBT uses unconditional acceptance (UA) to relieve self-induced suffering, such as shame. This is accomplished through use of unconditional self-acceptance (USA), unconditional other-acceptance (UOA), and unconditional life-acceptance (ULA).
With my approach to REBT, I incorporate author Stephen Covey’s concepts regarding the circles of control, influence, and concern, as well as an area of no concern. UA maps onto the circle of control (USA), circle of influence (UOA), and circle of concern and area of no concern (ULA).
The circle of control encompasses only oneself, the circle of influence encapsulates elements which may be subject to one’s sway, the circle of concern engrosses most matters one can imagine, and the area of no concern relates to all content which isn’t yet imagined.
Regarding her circle of control and USA, woman X may acknowledge that she’s merely a fallible human being. Concerning her circle of influence and UOA, woman X can admit that others may label her a ho; yet, she isn’t her behavior, and thus isn’t what others call her.
Relating to her circle of concern and ULA, woman X can recognize that the past is passed—it’s inalterable. Pertaining to her area of no concern, woman X may realize that an imaginary world in which one rides a cock carousel free of social consequences isn’t the world in which she lives.
Although girl dads, wife guys, and feminists may advocate infantilized care, custody, and control of women (writ large), as opposed to personal agency and ownership, I prefer the ABC model and UA. In similar fashion, although he was arguably a feminist, Ellis stated (page 21):
Let’s suppose you think it’s terrible to be rejected by somebody you really are attracted to, and therefore you’re shy and powerless to do something about it. When you start working on that belief cognitively, but very strongly, you tell yourself that it’s inconvenient and sad and unfortunate if a person you really like doesn’t like you, but it should be the way it is and it’s not terrible, because terrible means it’s almost more than bad. Yes, it may be very, very bad to you, but it shouldn’t be so bad that it’s terrible and you can’t stand it or be happy at all.
What to do? Very forcefully many times contradict that belief. You have to force yourself into action in order to really get rid of a belief. Take the risk, do what I call “shame-attacking” exercises – foolishly say things or do things in front of that person – and see that you don’t feel ashamed; you just feel sorry and regretful, and take the risk of being rejected, get rejected many times, and see that the world doesn’t come to an end.
Rather than assuming the view of powerlessness – perhaps reclassifying a gang bang as gang rape when the object of one’s desire doesn’t return one’s affection following hyper-promiscuous behavior – one can take personal agency and ownership for one’s own outcomes in life!
Even as girl dads, wife guys, and feminists treat you like a child, you can choose not to be infantilized by admitting your own responsibility and accountability concerning care, custody, and control. After all, you’re a self-determined and autonomous individual who has agency!
Therefore, you don’t have to allow a me problem to become a you problem. That’s a lie of feminism—that you can have it all, until you experience unpleasant consequences, at which point you can cling to narratives of victimhood. Own your shit!
If you’re looking for a provider who tries to work to help understand how thinking impacts physical, mental, emotional, and behavioral elements of your life—helping you to sharpen your critical thinking skills, I invite you to reach out today by using the contact widget on my website.
As a psychotherapist, I’m pleased to try to help people with an assortment of issues ranging from anger (hostility, rage, and aggression) to relational issues, adjustment matters, trauma experience, justice involvement, attention-deficit hyperactivity disorder, anxiety and depression, and other mood or personality-related matters.
At Hollings Therapy, LLC, serving all of Texas, I aim to treat clients with dignity and respect while offering a multi-lensed approach to the practice of psychotherapy and life coaching. My mission includes: Prioritizing the cognitive and emotive needs of clients, an overall reduction in client suffering, and supporting sustainable growth for the clients I serve. Rather than simply trying to help you to feel better, I want to try to help you get better!
Deric Hollings, LPC, LCSW
Photo credit, Designed by Magnific, fair use
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Hollings, D. (2025, December 5). Evaluations and appraisals: Men are gross, trash, and pigs. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/evaluations-and-appraisals-men-are-gross-trash-and-pigs
Hollings, D. (2026, June 4). Expectations: I’ve been sorting through a lot of shit that’s in my head now. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/expectations-i-ve-been-sorting-through-a-lot-of-shit-that-s-in-my-head-now
Hollings, D. (2025, May 15). External things can’t fix internal issues. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/external-things-can-t-fix-internal-issues
Hollings, D. (2023, September 8). Fair use. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/fair-use
Hollings, D. (2024, May 11). Fallible human being. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/fallible-human-being
Hollings, D. (2024, May 17). Feeling better vs. getting better. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/feeling-better-vs-getting-better-1
Hollings, D. (2023, February 9). Feminism. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/feminism
Hollings, D. (2026, February 13). Five, four, three… beliefs. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/five-four-three-beliefs
Hollings, D. (2023, October 12). Get better. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/get-better
Hollings, D. (2023, September 13). Global evaluations. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/global-evaluations
Hollings, D. (2024, April 13). Goals. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/goals
Hollings, D. (2024, August 27). Guilt and shame are choices. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/guilt-and-shame-are-choices
Hollings, D. (2025, September 7). Have to. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/have-to
Hollings, D. (2024, August 9). Healthy concern. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/healthy-concern
Hollings, D. (2026, June 6). High and dry: Steering a proverbial ship around unhelpful assumptions. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/high-and-dry-steering-a-proverbial-ship-around-unhelpful-assumptions
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Hollings, D. (2026, March 16). Hopeful anticipation vs. disturbing expectation. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/hopeful-anticipation-vs-disturbing-expectation
Hollings, D. (2025, April 4). I’m unaware of a quick fix. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/i-m-unaware-of-a-quick-fix
Hollings, D. (2026, May 4). I’ma air out my problemz. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/i-ma-air-out-my-problemz
Hollings, D. (2024, July 10). Ideal should beliefs. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/ideal-should-beliefs
Hollings, D. (2024, January 22). IDK. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/__idk
Hollings, D. (2026, September 27). Imagination: Rational emotive imagery. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/imagination-rational-emotive-imagery
Hollings, D. (2024, October 21). Impermanence and uncertainty. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/impermanence-and-uncertainty
Hollings, D. (2025, September 21). Impugning motive: Swallowing a toad. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/impugning-motive-swallowing-a-toad
Hollings, D. (2024, February 14). Insufferable vs. undesirable. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/insufferable-vs-undesirable
Hollings, D. (2026, February 8). Is It Desire, or Is It Love? Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/is-it-desire-or-is-it-love
Hollings, D. (2026, March 21). Is there no standard anymore? Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/is-there-no-standard-anymore
Hollings, D. (2026, March 20). Is your hood terrible? Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/is-your-hood-terrible
Hollings, D. (2022, August 31). Iss-me vs. iss-you. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/iss-me-vs-iss-you
Hollings, D. (2026, March 14). It’s just easy come and easy go: Tolerance and acceptance. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/it-s-just-easy-come-and-easy-go-tolerance-and-acceptance
Hollings, D. (2026, July 10). It’s not the thing itself that troubles you, but only your judgment of it. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/it-s-not-the-thing-itself-that-troubles-you-but-only-your-judgment-of-it
Hollings, D. (2026, April 3). Kno one: A negative evaluation – People aren’t their behavior. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/kno-one-a-negative-evaluation-people-aren-t-their-behavior
Hollings, D. (2025, October 13). Knowledge, wisdom, understanding. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/knowledge-wisdom-understanding
Hollings, D. (2022, November 10). Labeling. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/labeling
Hollings, D. (2024, July 10). Legal should beliefs. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/legal-should-beliefs
Hollings, D. (2023, September 19). Life coaching. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/life-coaching
Hollings, D. (2025, January 8). Life-downing. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/life-downing
Hollings, D. (2022, December 9). Like it, love it, accept it. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/like-it-love-it-accept-it
Hollings, D. (2026, May 17). Listening to reason through argument: Is the rhetoric of whataboutism persuasive? Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/listening-to-reason-through-argument-is-the-rhetoric-of-whataboutism-persuasive
Hollings, D. (2023, January 8). Logic and reason. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/logic-and-reason
Hollings, D. (2022, December 2). Low frustration tolerance. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/low-frustration-tolerance
Hollings, D. (2022, June 23). Meaningful purpose. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/meaningful-purpose
Hollings, D. (2025, April 16). Mentally corrupt decisions. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/mentally-corrupt-decisions
Hollings, D. (2024, July 10). Moral and ethical should beliefs. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/moral-and-ethical-should-beliefs
Hollings, D. (2024, September 27). My attitude. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/my-attitude
Hollings, D. (2025, August 2). My philosophy. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/my-philosophy
Hollings, D. (2026, July 9). Nonconscious: Just because you can’t detect the belief doesn’t mean that it isn’t present. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/nonconscious-just-because-you-can-t-detect-the-belief-doesn-t-mean-that-it-isn-t-present
Hollings, D. (2025, September 26). Observing eye and perceiving eye. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/observing-eye-and-perceiving-eye
Hollings, D. (2026, September 18). On feelings… again. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/on-feelings-again
Hollings, D. (2025, January 7). Other-downing. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/other-downing
Hollings, D. (2026, April 19). Outcome: Victim mentality and playing the victim. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/outcome-victim-mentality-and-playing-the-victim
Hollings, D. (2025, April 9). Perception, action, and will. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/perception-action-and-will
Hollings, D. (2024, February 24). Personal agency. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/personal-agency
Hollings, D. (2022, November 7). Personal ownership. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/personal-ownership
Hollings, D. (2025, September 9). Personal responsibility and accountability. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/personal-responsibility-and-accountability
Hollings, D. (2024, July 20). Perspective shift. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/perspective-shift
Hollings, D. (2025, September 19). Power. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/power
Hollings, D. (2024, July 10). Preferential should beliefs. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/preferential-should-beliefs
Hollings, D. (2024, January 1). Psychoeducation. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/psychoeducation
Hollings, D. (2023, September 15). Psychotherapeutic modalities. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/psychotherapeutic-modalities
Hollings, D. (2024, May 5). Psychotherapist. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/psychotherapist
Hollings, D. (2022, March 24). Rational emotive behavior therapy (REBT). Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/rational-emotive-behavior-therapy-rebt
Hollings, D. (2025, August 13). Rational versus irrational thoughts and beliefs. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/rational-versus-irrational-thoughts-and-beliefs
Hollings, D. (2024, January 1). Rational vs. irrational. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/rational-vs-irrational
Hollings, D. (2024, July 18). REBT flexibility. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/rebt-flexibility
Hollings, D. (2024, July 10). Recommendatory should beliefs. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/recommendatory-should-beliefs
Hollings, D. (2026, October 8). Retroactive revocation of consent: Regret isn’t tantamount to sexual assault and rape. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/retroactive-revocation-of-consent-regret-isn-t-tantamount-to-sexual-assault-and-rape
Hollings, D. (2023, February 17). Revisiting the circle of control. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/revisiting-the-circle-of-control
Hollings, D. (2024, January 4). Rigid vs. rigorous. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/rigid-vs-rigorous
Hollings, D. (2024, May 26). Self-determination and autonomy. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/self-determination-and-autonomy
Hollings, D. (2026, July 7). Self-distress and distress tolerance. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/self-distress-and-distress-tolerance
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Hollings, D. (2023, September 18). Sociopolitical pills. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/sociopolitical-pills
Hollings, D. (2025, December 24). Some people advocate walking. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/some-people-advocate-walking
Hollings, D. (2026, August 1). Spider-Man: Brand New Day - subversion and consent. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/spider-man-brand-new-day-subversion-and-consent
Hollings, D. (2026, May 31). Standards and principles. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/standards-and-principles
Hollings, D. (2025, December 28). Step up, step back: An infantilizing practice. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/step-up-step-back-an-infantilizing-practice
Hollings, D. (2023, October 16). Straw man. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/straw-man
Hollings, D. (2024, February 27). Suffering, struggling, and battling vs. experiencing. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/suffering-struggling-and-battling-vs-experiencing
Hollings, D. (2025, August 6). Take an inventory of your obligations. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/take-an-inventory-of-your-obligations
Hollings, D. (2022, December 23). The A-C connection. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/the-a-c-connection
Hollings, D. (2025, December 21). The awful, very bad, horrible, terrible, no good, unacceptable elements of life. Hollings Therapy, LLC. Retrieved from https://www.hollingstherapy.com/post/the-awful-very-bad-horrible-terrible-no-good-unacceptable-elements-of-life
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Wikipedia. (n.d.). Social justice. Retrieved from https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Social_justice
Wikipedia. (n.d.). Solidarity. Retrieved from https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Solidarity
Wikipedia. (n.d.). Stephen Covey. Retrieved from https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Stephen_Covey
Wikipedia. (n.d.). Tucker Carlson. Retrieved from https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tucker_Carlson
Wikipedia. (n.d.). United States Marine Corps. Retrieved from https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/United_States_Marine_Corps
